Extreme Pun Combo

Don't wanna be Obama self. I'm just China to make you happy. Yes, my pun Israel. Norway I'm lying, Syria stuff. You guys Ghana have to Czech these puns. Okay, I think I will Finnish now. I think Alaska guy to help me out because I’m Havana hard time. You have no India how long it took me to make these puns, but I hope they'll help Sweden your day because I Canada think of one anymore. Oman, I think Iran out of ideas Irish I can think of Samoa. I think my Bahrain can’t think of one anymore but Taiwan this to continue. I want Tibet that there are better things to do now. I Belize it’s time to put an end to these puns because I’m Oslo getting Bordeaux this. African hate these puns I want Togo because I Amsterdam tired. I’m Sudan with puns now.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SpareDestruction
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2014
🚨︎ report
John Bon Jovi has started an extremely strict fruit only diet...

He's living on a pear.

πŸ‘︎ 146
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10
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If a friend left you 12 bottles of wine on your doorstep, would you be extremely....

Grapeful.

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
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My trademark for extremely small grains of rice was rejected

Not sure why. I call it "Minute Rice" and it only takes about an hour to cook.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/maximusheadroom
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08
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Its extremely rare for a defibrillator not to work.

But when it happens no one’s shocked.

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RayInRed
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04
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This sub's extremely inactive...

There hasn't been any posts this year!

(Reposted at 12:01 AM 1.1.21 after a duel with autocorrect)

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VegetarianReaper
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
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My extremely low effort drawn out pun. What’s it trying to say?
πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/C3Slayer
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
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EXTREMELY proud of my 5 year old son for this uninentional one:

Son: Dad...we need a net.

Me: Why?

Son: To catch our flight.

πŸ‘︎ 179
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mynickname86
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
My twins give me chills, dehydration, fatigue, fever, loss of appetite, and extreme diarrhea.

Their names are Sam and Ella.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anddditburns
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
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There's a new extreme sport - "BBQ Skydiving".

The steaks have never been higher.

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
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I'm sorry, but I'm extremely proud of this one, and nobody in the chat found it funny =(
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ennis88
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2020
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What’s the difference between bird flu and swine flu?

One requires tweetment and the other requires oinkment.

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/danuser8
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
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Did you know: in boxing, it’s extremely important to have perfect form when going against a new fighter...

because the fist impression is everything.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BredSolid
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2020
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A little extreme don't you think?
πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Geng_r
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2020
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JFK was an extremely intelligent man

His brain was so big that it covered his entire car.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KonoAnonDa
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
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You never want to challenge an extreme dieter to a footrace...

Cuz they fast!

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
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Polar bears are known be extremely moody and sometimes even mate with their own gender.

Thus truly making them bipolar

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ssigea
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
🚨︎ report
A toilet, a urinal and a very drunk sink are all at the front of a club, fighting and arguing with the bouncer to allow them and their extremely intoxicated friend inside.

Repeatedly shouting β€œLet that sink in!”

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ciceromilton
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2020
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My girlfriend asked me what my favorite extreme hobby was, I replied camping...

...Because it’s in tents.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chicoquadcore
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2020
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My wife is extremely upset that I've been drinking brake fluid

She shouldnt be mad, I can stop any time I want

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2020
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Extremely unique puns - even the shirt is a pun youtu.be/dSoPYdphtzk
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
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My date was really excited when I invited her over for cocktails, but she left extremely disappointed.

She didn’t want to hear stories about my rooster.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
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Why is six afraid of seven

Because seven eight nine ( extremely bad joke I leant in kindergarten btw)

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zellerzium
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14
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If you wear cowboy clothes are you ranch dressing?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
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I have this pet rodent with extremely large feet.

I call him Ratatouille

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πŸ‘€︎ u/forrestree
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
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Just returned from my extreme camping trip.

It was in tents!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mndaver24
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2020
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What do you call a 60-year old flying in a jet- fighter?

A sonic boomer.

πŸ‘︎ 591
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zuwiboiii
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
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What did the doctor say when everybody left his office extremely slowly?

"I'm losing my patience!"

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KingPinTony
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2020
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When I was young, I was extremely bright.

Because of this, my dad called me "sun."

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SilentTempestLord
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
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The question was: "How do people with extremely long fake nails properly wipe their butts after pooping? Saw someone struggling to type on their phone today with those bad boys"
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LogangYeddu
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2020
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In an alternate universe, instead of asking for whatever he touches to be gold, Midas just asked for his jokes to be made extremely hilarious.

Everything was comedy gold.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CrammerTheGamer
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
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I saw a guy walk into a store and buy 5 smoke machines, so I called the cops.

He must be in some extreme mist group.

πŸ‘︎ 130
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
🚨︎ report
People who spam gas grenades in shooters are extremely toxic.
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/darkkiller1234
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2020
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I love extreme camping

It's in tents

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DanFntastic
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2019
🚨︎ report
A sketchy looking guy rented six smoke machines from my shop, so I called the cops.

He must be part of some extreme mist group.

πŸ‘︎ 606
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
🚨︎ report
In the future...

In 1,000 years, snails will evolve into being an advanced civilization. They will develop their own advanced technologies. In an effort to increase their mobility, they will equip their shells to be modular vehicles called Snail Cars, S-Car for short. Since snails do not have upper extremities, controlling the cars will be voice activated. The initiation command would be, "S-Car, GO!" πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dan_the_Man0904
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
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When we got married, I was extremely poor, but my wife stood by me during those times.

She had to. We only had one chair.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
🚨︎ report
The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve.

It was an Apple, but with extremely limited memory. Just one byte. And then everything crashed.

Edits: Thanks for all the awards!

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/deant_b01
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2020
🚨︎ report
A french farmer who owned an olive plantation had a huge fire

He was extremely sad, he had lost his all his huile d'olive.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bacononwaffles
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
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What do you call a trian with extreme paranoia?

Off the rails

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bippidybopboop
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Made it while watching BvS. Idk why people hate it, it's a good movie
πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LazertheRedditer
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
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How do you make a salad more extreme?

You add extra RADDDDishes πŸ€™

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tjzona
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Race horse Pat

There was a race horse named Pat, who was one of the greatest race horses to ever live. He set records that were near impossible to beat. After a long time of racing, he retired to an old stable with some old friends. They were very happy that he retired there to stay with him, and congratulated him on all of his records that he set.

Once Pat retired, he started keeping track of all the up and coming horses that were winning a lot. There was a race horse named Charlie that was doing really great and winning all his races. Pat saw this horse and watched him race. Charlie started to break all of Pat’s records and Pat was a little upset with this.

After a while, Charlie decided to retire after an extremely successful career in racing. By chance, Charlie decided to retire at the same stable that Pat retired in. When Charlie entered the stable, everyone went up to him to congratulate him on his records and wins. Pat went up to Charlie and said, β€œHey Charlie congratulations on all of your wins! You broke a lot of my records and I was very impressed.” Charlie responds, β€œgo away old man, I’m better than you ever were.” Pat was blown away by his response. He galloped away from Charlie with defeat.

After a while of thinking, Pat decides to challenge Charlie to a race. Charlie agreed to it and wanted to race right away. He said β€œWe will race to the tree over there and turn around and come back and whoever gets there first will be the winner.” Pat was still healthy but he needed a few weeks to get his legs back into shape for the race. Charlie gives Pat 2 weeks to get ready.

After 2 weeks pass, they are ready to race. β€œHey Pat, before we race I want to warn you that I win my races by passing them by the end. So don’t get all cocky and think you are going to win.” Charlie says. Pat thanks him for the warning and they start getting set to race.

The gun sounds and they are off to race. Pat starts out in front, and nears the finish. Out of know where, Charlie zooms ahead of Pat and wins the race.

Pat was very disappointed in his loss, but congratulated Charlie anyways. A dog comes up to them and says, β€œWow, that was a fantastic race! Neither of you should be upset with that. You both were so great!” Charlie looks to Pat and Pat looks to Charlie. They are astonished. Charlie says, β€œSay that again! Say it again!” The dog says a little confused, β€œWell I just said that you both were so great out there.” Pat says, β€œCharlie! It’s a talking dog!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SnappyOrange69
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Even though he had an extreme fear of heights, why did the butcher resolve to climb all the way up the ladder?

The steaks were too high.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VNPimpinella
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2019
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Start of a rocky relationship
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/eyeyamstewpig
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2019
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What were Donald Trump’s COVID-19 test results?

Extremely positive. The most positive, in fact. Everybody’s talking about it. It’s yuuuge. Nobody’s seen anything like it. Sleepy joe never would’ve been able to pull this off.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/taylor5479
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2020
🚨︎ report

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