I got a girlfriend by pretending that I play football. My friends don't think it's going to last but I don't worry.
She thinks that I'm a keeper.
A woman suddenly in labor shouts, shouldn’t! wouldn’t! couldn’t! didn’t! can’t! The doctor says "don't worry."
“Those are just contractions.”
How do you tell the difference between a boy ant and a girl ant? (SFW don't worry)
Put them in water. If one floats, it's (a) boyant.
I got in a car wreck and lost my left arm, but don’t worry...
I’m all right.
buh-dum-tsss
Father talks to his 5-year-old son: “No, Petie, you don’t have to worry. There is no monster sleeping under your bed.
It sleeps every day in the bed next to me.
*calls mum * son : I'm in hospital but don't worry everything is fine
Mum : you're the daym doctor and this wasn't funny the first time
NASA put a watch around a potted plant and sent it on a rocket to the sun. I said to my Daughter, "don't worry, it will be ok.."
"a watched pot never boils"
Don’t worry if you’re tall or skinny or rich or poor. And the end of the day...
Don't worry about catching COVID from the gifts that Santa delivers
They will all be Santatized
Don't worry I can find the door myself
My friend asks if it is okay to park without paying. I told him, “don’t worry.”
My son cried when he lost his first girlfriend. I told him don't worry its not the end of the world
Feeling overwhelmed? Don't worry!
My friend sent me this (don’t worry I didn’t block her)
Doctor: your brain fell out during the accident but don't worry I put it back in
Me: thanks for reminding me
Don't worry, I'm fine after the sex operation
Don't worry if you didn't get to enjoy 4/20
You might be worried about overeating while you’re quarantined, but it’s better than risking the spread of disease. So don’t worry...
It will be worth the weight.
Don't worry about your smartphone or computer spying on you...
Your vacuum has been gathering dirt on you for years
This is an ill eagle image. (Don't worry, he's much better now.)
Don't worry the situation is under control
If you regret your vote in 2016, don't worry about it
My sister talking about Christmas: “I don’t worry about Christmas, I got it all under wraps”
My dad said the other day, when I was feeling low, 'don't worry it could be worse, you could be in a hole full of water'
Don't worry the spider is smaller than you
Well yeah, and so is a grenade
Don't worry, I've got a congealed wepon permit.
Man: Ugh, I’ve had really bad gas lately. Doctor: Don’t worry...
My buddy is getting his left arm amputated tomorrow. Don't worry, he'll be all right.
Don't worry, I have everything under control.
If you buy real, block Parmesan you don't have to worry about tossing it in your bag
Oh seems like I've got a flat tire, don't worry I've got a spare in the back
Opens up to reveal two bowling pins
I got hit in the head today with a Diet Coke. Don’t worry. I’m not hurt....
Don't worry , this is just a troll post
All the dads who are just trying out a new beard and think they don't look good with it, do not worry
Don’t worry about your lactose intolerance...
...it’s of second dairy importance to your other problems.
Lucky for us, we don’t have to worry about anti-vaxxers brainwashing their children.
If you get a haircut you don't like, don't worry about it.
Soon enough it'll grow on you.
Did you hear about the guy who's whole left side is cut off? Yeah don't worry he is all right now.
I was talking about the dangers of the web with my son. He says, “Don’t worry dad, I know all about the dark web!”
I then asked him, “Well how do you get there? I’ve tried turning off the lights and everything.”
Don't worry about that pachyderm...
It's irrelephant, anyway.
I asked my friend to help me with a math problem. He said: “Don’t worry, this is a piece of cake!”...
... I said: “No, it’s a math problem.”
There was a court case on public nudity but don't worry
I got hit in the head with a can of Diet Coke today. Don’t worry, I’m not hurt.
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