Did you hear about the guy who went on a fruit diet? In just 2 days, he became completely obnoxious
Evidently, it is enough to make a Mango crazy
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︎ Apr 16 2021
Did you hear about the man who abandoned his diet, for an ice cream cone?
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︎ Apr 15 2021
After careful consideration, Iβve decided to go on an entirely vegetarian based diet.
I will now only eat animals that are herbivores.
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︎ Apr 01 2021
My girlfriend's walked out on me, saying she's sick to death of my healthy, but boring diet.
Never mind though, plenty more fish in the freezer.
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︎ Mar 11 2021
My friend Joe recently went on the Dolly Parton diet...
It made Joe lean, Joe lean, Joe lean, Joe lean!
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︎ Jan 12 2021
Iβm on a whiskey diet.
Iβve lost three days already.
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︎ Mar 14 2021
So I started that Ketogenic diet and my bowel movements have improved drastically!
So this is just a βquality shit postβ
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︎ Mar 05 2021
My wife says I'm on a seafood diet....
When I see food, I eat it!
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︎ Mar 19 2021
John Bon Jovi has started an extremely strict fruit only diet...
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︎ Jan 10 2021
What is the best diet for a golfer?
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︎ Feb 12 2021
Last week I tried an all banana diet.
I didnβt find it very appealing.
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︎ Jan 19 2021
I have a condition that prevents me from going on a diet....
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︎ Feb 12 2021
I've started my new diet. It's called the Saudi Arabian cannibal diet...
You just have a Sheikh for breakfast.
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︎ Jan 31 2021
My wife complains that I'm getting fat. So this winter I decided to diet.
It's called inter"mitten" fasting to keep my hands of food
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︎ Feb 13 2021
What did the bodybuilder ask the other bodybuilder when wanting details about his diet?
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︎ Dec 25 2020
Donβt knock it until you diet
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︎ Oct 10 2020
My wife is on a tropical fruit diet, the house is full of stuff
It is enough to make a mango crazy
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︎ Dec 07 2020
I changed my diet...
...the cookies now stand left of my keyboard.
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︎ Dec 07 2020
Mahatma Gandhi walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him ..
A super calloused fragile mystic hexed with halitosis (edited, thanks kind friends for the correction!)
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︎ Jun 22 2020
Maintaining a healthy diet...
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︎ Dec 06 2020
Diet Diary, Day one : Have just removed all the fattening food from the House..
..and it was so delicious.
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︎ Sep 19 2020
Well, I've been on a diet for a whole week now...
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︎ Oct 27 2020
What is a redhead's favorite diet?
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︎ Nov 02 2020
Why canβt Swiss cheese be part of a fat-free diet?
Itβs made with hole milk.
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︎ Dec 21 2019
Carbs are great for your diet
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︎ Jul 12 2020
I thought about going on an all almond diet
But that would be just nuts
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︎ Aug 21 2020
Have you heard of this diet?
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︎ Jun 14 2020
I wanted to go on a diet,
But thereβs too much on my plate.
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︎ Aug 30 2020
I told my friend his βhundred eggs in five daysβ diet made me deathly ill.
He told me that was an eggsaturation.
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︎ Jul 31 2020
My uncle drink dialed me the other night and told me he was going on an exclusively almond diet.
I said, "That's just nuts."
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︎ Aug 06 2020
Most Men Don't Have Enough Fiber In Their Diet. Crazy Isn't It?
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︎ Jul 16 2020
I was going to start an all cashew diet
But then I realized thatβs just nuts...
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︎ Dec 04 2019
I'm on the Minecraft diet.
Three square meals a day.
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︎ Jul 17 2020
The other day, I told my son a joke about his pet iguanaβs diet.
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︎ Mar 08 2020
I went on a gluten free diet because I was experiencing constant headaches.
And it actually worked. Clearly my-grains were the issue here.
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︎ Apr 07 2020
My Doctor has me on a diet to help epilepic attacks...
Mainly spasmati rice and seizure salads...
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︎ Jul 07 2020
My friend Joe recently went on the Dolly Parton diet...
It really made Joe lean, Joe lean, Joe lean, Joe leannnnnnn.... πΆ
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︎ Dec 23 2020
My friend Joe went on the Dolly Parton diet.
It really made Joe lean, Joe lean, Joe lean...
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︎ Dec 11 2020
My friend Joe went on the Dolly Parton diet.
It really made Joe Lean, Joe Lean, Joe Lean, Joe Lean
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︎ Dec 20 2020
I'm on a seafood diet
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︎ Oct 24 2020
My girlfriend started an all fruit diet yesterday, the house is FULL of the stuff.
ItsΒ enoughΒ toΒ makeΒ aΒ mangoΒ crazy!
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︎ Aug 05 2020
Mahatma Ghandi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an incredible set of callouses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail. Plus, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.
This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
Edit: I do now realize I misspelled Gandhi. I cannot edit the title, just know that I see it and am sorry.
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︎ Jul 08 2019
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
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︎ Apr 17 2020
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.
This made him, A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
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︎ Mar 23 2020
I thought about going on an all-almond diet
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︎ Sep 15 2020
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.
This made him, A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
Edit: Wow! Didn't expect this big reaction!
Thanks for the silver!
Edit 2: And gold!? Thanks again! :)
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︎ Feb 06 2019
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