Me: It wasn't good for the Titanic.
Hard core park ore
Their names were In and Out. They lived in a hollow tree stump with their mother. Sometimes they liked to play inside, and sometimes outside.
One day, In was outside, and Out was inside. Mamma skunk asked Out to go find his brother. So Out went out, to bring In in. A short while later they both came inside. Mamma asked Out how he managed to find his brother so fast.
He smiled and said: "Instinct"
Dense with dents.
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How dense the population is.
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How dense the population is.
But light bends around her.
My work uses punny names for all its example scenarios. Things like Dustin Dubree, Dora Jarr, Duane Pipes, etc.
One of them is David Jochim and no one in my class of 7 can figure this out.
So it’s either not a pun, or we’re dense.
What is the stupidest thing in the universe?
A black hole, because it's so dense!
The glass had two different colored layers.
Me: " Hey check out the tea I"m steeping"
Dad: "It must have different dense-i-teas"
Stressed exactly like you think it sounds.
It makes sense when you think about it
(Say it out loud if you're confused)
Milk, because it's pasteurized before you see it
That was when I realized he was her favorite twin, not me.
"Okay, so this is the screwdriver, this is the wrench, and this, well, you know the drill."
It’s a heavy problem
If you ever end up having to entertain kids around kindergarten age (5 or 6 years old) here are some jokes you can use.
Write the letter Y on a board or piece of paper. Ask, "Can you tell me what this letter is?" and they'll say "Y", to which you respond, "Because I want to know how smart you are."
After a bit of back and forth you can look exasperated that they don't get it (when of course it is you who don't get it), then say, "Okay here's an easy one, can you tell me what this word is?" Write down the word NO and of course the kids will say "NO" and you can say, "You don't know what this word is?" or "You know what it is but you won't tell me?" Kids usually think it's hilarious that an adult can be this dense.
For kids who can spell words, you can use ones like "duck" and then when they say it you can duck as if something is coming at you.
They’re very dense
Stop being so dense.
He must be too dense.
he'd be Charles Dense.
Was driving next to a dense forest on the highway, when I spotted a family of deer. Naturally, I slowed down and when I passed them I said, "Hi deer!"then I turned to the ladyfriend and said "Hi dear!"
Got an eye roll and a smile.
I quickly replied with "you know that was fawny" which got me punched in the arm.
For instance, metal-heads are pretty damn dense.
Too dense to listen though.
It was in a dense forest, and the instructor was waiting for me when I arrived. I pulled out my compass, but he laughed and shook his head. "That won't work here, you know," he said, pointing at my compass. "What do you mean?" I asked, "This is an orienteering course, isn't it?" "Ja, it is an orienteering course, but you can a compass not use." I was very puzzled at this point, and I questioned, "Why?" "There are too many Poles."
That was one dense motherfucker.
Me: There's a dense fog rolling into Cleveland from the lake.
Dad: That's eErie.
pause
followed by laughter on both ends
Talking about books.
Her: "Have you heard of the Annals of the HeeChee? Terrible books I read as a kid. Aliens who live in a black hole."
Me: "Sounds dense."
Her: "It wasn't too bad, it was--oh."
Yesterday was Opening Day (baseball) at Target Field (Minnesota). The first 10,000 or so fans received a free blue zip-up hoodie with "Twins" emblazoned on the front. It's a damn fine hoodie.
It's also packed on the stadium concourse. 40,123 attendees that day. As my husband and I are making our way through a dense crowd along the right field concourse, an older gentleman stops me in my tracks with this big grin and says, "Wow, that's a great sweatshirt! Where'd you get it?"
He was holding one in his hand.
His other hand was holding that of his wife, who was rolling her eyes pretty hard. I imagine that was neither the first nor last time he'd made that joke yesterday.
- How dense the population is
- How dense the population is
- A dense population
- A population being dense
- How dense the local population is
- How dense the local population is
- How dense the population is
- How dense the population is
