Obtuse Puns

It was over 90 degrees

But math puns make me number.

They’re pointless.

It's acute story...

It always thought it was right, but it was really quite obtuse.

Because being stuck with the land of the Angles is obtuse

I don’t know what his angle is.

I told her to stand in the corner because it's 90 degrees

1. Why was the fraction apprehensive about marrying the decimal? Because he would have to convert.

2. Why do plants hate math? It gives them square roots.

3. Why did the student get upset when his teacher called him average? It was a mean thing to say!

4. Why was the math book depressed? It had a lot of problems.

5. Why is the obtuse triangle always so frustrated? Because it is never right.

6. Why can you never trust a math teacher holding graphing paper? He must be plotting something.

7. Why was the equal sign so humble? Because she knew she wasn’t greater than or less than anyone else.

8. What do you call the number 7 and the number 3 when they go out on a date? The odd couple

9. What do you call a number that can’t stay in one place? A Roamin’ numeral.

10. Did you hear the one about the statistician? Probably.

11. What do you call dudes who love math? Algebros.

12. I’ll do algebra, I’ll do trig. I’ll even do statistics. But graphing is where I draw the line!

13. Why should you never talk to Pi? Because she’ll go on and on and on forever.

14. Why are parallel lines so tragic if they have so much in common? It’s a shame they’ll never meet.

15. Are monsters good at math? Not unless you Count Dracula.

16. What’s the best way to flirt with a math teacher? Use acute angle.

17. Did you hear about the mathematician who is afraid of negative numbers? They’d stop at nothing to avoid them.

18. How do you stay warm in any room? Just huddle in the corner, where it’s always 90 degrees.

19. Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven eight ("ate") nine!

20. Why DID seven eat nine? Because you’re supposed to eat 3 squared meals a day!

21. Why does nobody talk to circles? Because there is no point.

He was a right angler.

Because it wanted to get in shape.

They are just trying to be edgy.

When it's a rect angle

I wanted to post a photo of a triangle on r/aww because it contained acute angle.

Looks like I finally did something right.

So I said “Go sit in the corner, it’s 90 degrees over there.”

There their, they’re there

Quick backstory, my Dad was rushed to the hospital last night with an acute pericardial effusion. Of course, we didn't know the cause at the time, so when the Doc came into my Dads room in the ER to tell him what's going on and what they were going to do, emergency surgery, this is how the conversation went...

Doc: Mr FloatyMcBoatFace's Dad, You have fluid building up around your heart, an Acute Pericardial Effusion, and we have to go to surgery right away to get that fluid out of there.

My Dad: Well, good thing it isn't an Obtuse Pericardial Effusion...

The entire family groaned. The Dr and Nurse couldn't help but laugh after a few seconds of what I assume was shock.

Anyway, he seems to be doing fine, he's still in the hospital under observation though.

I think they have an obtuse personality

Me (Mr. Nerdy Smooth): You know you're less than 90 degrees?

Popular Girl: Because I'm acute?

It was at that moment I knew I had to marry her. We'll be married 11 years next month. :)

Today I told my father that I was cold. His response was to go stand in a corner. For the life of me I couldn't figure out why he said such.

His response:

Corners are 90 degrees!

They always do a complete 180.

The people I met were quite obtuse, and their punishments for sins are too acute.

But they might be right.

But that's just obtuse.

Me: "I can do it!" Wife: "We need a professional." Me:"But those roofers are always working some kind of angle, the work is protracted, and the cost is steep!" Wife:"Don't be obtuse."

She won.

I got home after failing an algebra exam and I told my dad "I'm gonna get acute depression if I see a proof one more time."

He said to me "You would get obtuse depression if you were doing the math we did in my days."

Just when I thought my day couldn't get any worse.

Interviewee: "I have a an obtuse persona,"

Boss: "Oh, how so?"

Interviewee: "My back hunches forward, so I can't stand up straight"

I instantly "unprofessionally"chuckle

Angel: "Behold! I exceed ninety degrees!"

Isaiah: "Uh... what?"

And the angel gave no explanation and vanished.

Isaiah muttered: "What an obtuse angel."

Her: "What's wrong with weird?" Me: "He's not a cute weird......he's obtuse weird. SEE WHAT I DID THERE? SEE?" Her: "I don't catch your angle."

I love her.

Because it was more than 90°

You use acute angle. However, I'm probably just being obtuse.