My son and I were waiting at a train crossing. He tells me "that train looks bigger than I remember"
So I say, "It's been training"
A chicken crossing the road...
I absolutely hate crossing t's
Dotting i's is okay since it's just a dot, but t's are where I draw the line.
What did Bones say to Captain Kirk at the river crossing?
Dam it, Jim
(Be gentle it’s my cake day)
I couldn't decide on which side of the road I wanted to use my loom. On the northbound side the southbound side looked better. And upon crossing to the southbound side, the northbound side looked better. The cops soon arrested me for operating under the influence.
They said I was weaving all over the road.
Every time i drive over a railroad crossing I say there's been a train through here recently do you know how I can tell?
Railroad crossing without any cars. Spell that without any R’s
My wife volunteers as a school crossing guard.
I tell everyone she’s into human trafficking.
Did you hear about the bag of sugar that was caught illegally crossing the road for the second time that day?
I heard someone played Animal Crossing: New Horizons for so long on end they conked out with the console still in their hands.
Looks like someone fell asleep at the Switch.
So I saw a group of people crossing the street tonight carrying ski stuff the one guy in the front of the group was tasked with carrying the ski poles...
So I guess you can say that they put him in pole position
I got hit by a rickshaw while crossing the road today
What do you call three Mexicans crossing the border?
I’ve decided to get Animal Crossing
It crossed my mind that I need to broaden my horizons
My buddy was concerned about his chicken crossing the road.
I said his concerns are poultry.
Moses had a really big part in crossing the Red Sea
I saw a guy trying to cross a really busy street. Trying to be helpful, I said, “You know, there is a zebra crossing 50ft ahead.”
He said, “I hope he’s having a better luck than I am.”
Every time we go over a railroad crossing, I tell my kids...
“Hey, a train just went by!"
“How do you know daddy?”
“Because its tracks are still here!”
Which jedi was famous for crossing streets?
Drives by railroad crossing: a train came through here not to long ago. It’s tracks are still here
A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails.
When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. It all happened so fast.”
What do you get when crossing an agnostic, dyslexic, and insomniac?
A person who stays awake all night pondering if there really is a dog.
When crossing the road to the music store
How do you call a spanish guy crossing your property?
Trespassito
^((i am so sorry, alexa play despacito))
It’s important to look both ways before crossing the street, but don’t be like your late uncle Carl...
... make sure you are looking left and right, NOT up and down.
Why did the lion cross the road? Because he saw a zebra-crossing...
What do you get when crossing an Elephant and a Rhino?
Family of tomatoes is crossing the street
Dad tomato, mom tomato and son tomato. Son tomato is going too slow so his dad slaps him and says ketchup.
Just called the police on the schools crossing guard
As we were passing over a railroad crossing my dad gave me this one.
Him: A train just came through there, you know how I could tell?
Me: How?
Him: I could see its tracks.
Every time we pass a railroad crossing...
"OH WOW THIS IS SPECTACULAR. A train must have been here recently, you can still see its tracks!!"
Dad and son crossing street together
Me and my kid crossing the street.
Kid: "There was a gummy bear in the crosswalk, wonder how that happened."
Me: "I don't know, but that bear is sure stuck there."
Bow
Crossing the street with my padre
We get to the crosswalk and the signal says "Wait."
My dad says 215 pounds and walks across.
What do you call a chicken crossing the road?
My wife volunteers as a crossing guard, but gets really mad at me when I tell everyone about it.
I say, “She’s into human trafficking.”
Railroad Crossing
Railroad crossing, look out for cars.
Can you spell that without any "R"s?
Every time we go past a railroad crossing, I always tell my kids, "Hey, a train just went by!" They grudgingly ask, “How do you know daddy?”
“Because its tracks are still here!”
Railroad crossing without any cars, can you spell that without any "r"s?
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