I absolutely hate crossing t's
Dotting i's is okay since it's just a dot, but t's are where I draw the line.
I couldn't decide on which side of the road I wanted to use my loom. On the northbound side the southbound side looked better. And upon crossing to the southbound side, the northbound side looked better. The cops soon arrested me for operating under the influence.
They said I was weaving all over the road.
What did Bones say to Captain Kirk at the river crossing?
Dam it, Jim
(Be gentle it’s my cake day)
Did you hear about the bag of sugar that was caught illegally crossing the road for the second time that day?
Railroad crossing without any cars. Spell that without any R’s
My wife volunteers as a crossing guard, but gets really mad at me when I tell everyone about it.
I say, “She’s into human trafficking.”
I heard someone played Animal Crossing: New Horizons for so long on end they conked out with the console still in their hands.
Looks like someone fell asleep at the Switch.
I got hit by a rickshaw while crossing the road today
So I saw a group of people crossing the street tonight carrying ski stuff the one guy in the front of the group was tasked with carrying the ski poles...
So I guess you can say that they put him in pole position
What do you call three Mexicans crossing the border?
I’ve decided to get Animal Crossing
It crossed my mind that I need to broaden my horizons
My buddy was concerned about his chicken crossing the road.
I said his concerns are poultry.
Moses had a really big part in crossing the Red Sea
I saw a guy trying to cross a really busy street. Trying to be helpful, I said, “You know, there is a zebra crossing 50ft ahead.”
He said, “I hope he’s having a better luck than I am.”
What reward to you get for running out of money in animal crossing?
Every time we go over a railroad crossing, I tell my kids...
“Hey, a train just went by!"
“How do you know daddy?”
“Because its tracks are still here!”
Which jedi was famous for crossing streets?
Drives by railroad crossing: a train came through here not to long ago. It’s tracks are still here
A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails.
When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. It all happened so fast.”
When crossing the road to the music store
It’s important to look both ways before crossing the street, but don’t be like your late uncle Carl...
... make sure you are looking left and right, NOT up and down.
What do you get when crossing an agnostic, dyslexic, and insomniac?
A person who stays awake all night pondering if there really is a dog.
How do you call a spanish guy crossing your property?
Trespassito
^((i am so sorry, alexa play despacito))
What do you get when crossing an Elephant and a Rhino?
Why did the lion cross the road? Because he saw a zebra-crossing...
So my dad and I pull up to a railroad crossing...
Dad: "You don't have to stop, the train already went."
Me: "How do you know that, dad?"
Dad: "It left its tracks."
Family of tomatoes is crossing the street
Dad tomato, mom tomato and son tomato. Son tomato is going too slow so his dad slaps him and says ketchup.
As we were passing over a railroad crossing my dad gave me this one.
Him: A train just came through there, you know how I could tell?
Me: How?
Him: I could see its tracks.
What stopped the chicken from crossing the road?
Just called the police on the schools crossing guard
What did the lollipop lady say to the zebra crossing?
'You're stripping me of a job.'
Every time we pass a railroad crossing...
"OH WOW THIS IS SPECTACULAR. A train must have been here recently, you can still see its tracks!!"
Dad and son crossing street together
Me and my kid crossing the street.
Kid: "There was a gummy bear in the crosswalk, wonder how that happened."
Me: "I don't know, but that bear is sure stuck there."
Bow
Crossing the street with my padre
We get to the crosswalk and the signal says "Wait."
My dad says 215 pounds and walks across.
Crossing Star Wars and Men's clothing, a rare breed of dad joke
Me: The new Star Wars villain's name is Kylo Ren
Dad: Yes his father is Ralph Lo Ren
A turtle was crossing the road...
...in front of our shuttle bus yesterday, on our way to a Civil War re-enactment. "He's trying to get away from the battle before it begins", said our driver.
Without missing a beat, I quipped "Yeah, he must have heard there was going to be a shelling."
Half-hearted groans were had, and my wife wanted to disappear. Success!
We have a 'Cambria St' near our house. Everything we drive toward it before crossing I remind those in the car...
That we're in our Pre Cambrian era.
Groans ensue!
When we're crossing the street.
"I am always 'Jay' walking." - Jay, my dad.
My wife volunteers as a school crossing guard.
I tell everyone she’s into human trafficking.
Railroad Crossing
Railroad crossing, look out for cars.
Can you spell that without any "R"s?
Every time we go past a railroad crossing, I always tell my kids, "Hey, a train just went by!" They grudgingly ask, “How do you know daddy?”
“Because its tracks are still here!”
Railroad crossing without any cars, can you spell that without any "r"s?
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