I love puns, butt this is getting outta control
πŸ‘︎ 106
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πŸ‘€︎ u/communist_scumbag
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Remote control
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Molbbo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Scientists developed a male birth control gel but it only targets the X/Y chromosome

Theyre calling it "Son-Block"

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kriskidd21
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I got myself a universal remote control

And man, it changes everything.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LMF5000
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2020
🚨︎ report
My doctor said I should drink alcohol in moderation. I don't think I can control my drinking...

... but it's worth a shot!

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thirteen_20
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Can new shock absorbers make a car easier to control?

Of course - it goes without swaying!”

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crazyfortaco
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I can't find the control for my TV.

It must be in a remote location.

πŸ‘︎ 108
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shininglice
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2020
🚨︎ report
They Are Coming For Our Puns (Guns) - Say NO to Pun Control. beartariatimes.com/2020/1…
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BannanaCabana
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I hooked up a spooky mind control device to a windowblind making machine

Just thinking about it makes me shutter

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/darkstarman
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call strict quality control of threads?

Screwtiny

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/octalgon
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Epitome of self control
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LogangYeddu
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Control
πŸ‘︎ 182
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πŸ‘€︎ u/xxanthis
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control, I thought to myself,

this changes everything

πŸ‘︎ 72
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πŸ‘€︎ u/well_I_swan
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did Karen press Shift-Control-Escape on her PC?

She wanted to see the Task Manager.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cyberentomology
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2020
🚨︎ report
There's a rather unknown Greek myth that involved Zeus farting so loudly that it caused powerful lightning storms all over Greece. Panic and chaos ensued, and there was widespread looting as fires raged out on control.

Thus began the Zeus Toot Riots.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hollowbody57
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2020
🚨︎ report
How do you use a remote control to calm down a robot dog?

Press the paws button.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MGreenMN
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2020
🚨︎ report
The puns at this Chinese place are out of control
πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/puppylove1000
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I tried out some riot control equipment today...

But it made a mace

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/oofsoof
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2020
🚨︎ report
The first time I bought a universal remote control...

...I thought to myself "This changes everything."

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MacItaly
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
🚨︎ report
On a keyboard, nothing is under control.

(unless there's a touchpad)

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2020
🚨︎ report
In the Disney animated picture, Ratatouille, Remy controls Linguini actions by pulling his hair, giving him a perfect palette. The little chef’s squeak is the only other voice Linguini ever really hears at home.

I guess you could say Remy is Linguini’s voice of season

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2020
🚨︎ report
How did China get the virus under control?

They used Han sanitizer.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/codemon
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the new topical birth control medicine?

They’re calling it Sonblock.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chibiachika
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
🚨︎ report
I keep hearing Mission Control check in with Dragon Crew, asking "How do you read, over."

And I just KNOW if I were up there I would be physically unable to keep myself from responding "Dragon to Mission Control, I read with my eyes, over." I wonder how many times before they airlock me.

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/H_G_Bells
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2020
🚨︎ report
Saw a tv listed for $10. Only problem was the volume control was stuck..

Couldn’t turn that down

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PrisonMike1111
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Birth control should be the actual name used for delivery
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/poven100
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
🚨︎ report
"Hey honey did you hear they came out with a male birth control cream?"

It's being marketed as Son-block.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SerbianTarHeel
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
🚨︎ report
They have a new birth control pill for men that's the size of a small pebble.

You put it in your shoe and it makes you limp.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notagoodspelller
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2020
🚨︎ report
A man just made me an offer to buy speakers with no volume controls.

I couldn't turn it down.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Situation under control
πŸ‘︎ 78
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TyRoland06
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2019
🚨︎ report
What is the creamiest control?

Control+V. Because it's a paste!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nirinaron
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I have this weird talent where I can control sheep just by listening to them.

I herd it with my own ears.

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2020
🚨︎ report
My addiction to Helium is out of control, but...

No one is taking my cries for help seriously.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheBigSubpoena
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Dad was too cheap to buy weed killer, so he made us kids jump on weeds to control them. He always told me:

Only you can stamp out domestic violets.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GotMyOrangeCrush
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I’ve lost control
πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DemonMastr166
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I feel like I have no control over my body

[deleted]

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KoronaSenpai
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2020
🚨︎ report
I meant to just give my keyboard a quick dusting... And then I lost control.
πŸ‘︎ 57
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shanewd40
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Everything is under control bois
πŸ‘︎ 356
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Phi2005
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2019
🚨︎ report
I have control now!
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SoulLeviathan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2019
🚨︎ report
He lost control
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CavingGrape
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Don't worry the situation is under control
πŸ‘︎ 52
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RandomJackson90
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Fan control in the asrock bios -_-
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mi_sh_aaaa
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Redditor was cleaning keyboard, but then lost control
πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tho3maxi
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2019
🚨︎ report
If the stork is the bird of birth, what's the bird of birth control?

A swallow.

πŸ‘︎ 873
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nikkobe
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2019
🚨︎ report
I've lost control
πŸ‘︎ 105
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πŸ‘€︎ u/biggus-_-dickus
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2019
🚨︎ report
I want to create a birth control pill that you take just before sex. The pill could even be mint flavored.

I’ll call them pre dick a-mints

πŸ‘︎ 81
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πŸ‘€︎ u/linknt01
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2019
🚨︎ report
I can't find the control for my TV.

It must be in a remote location.

πŸ‘︎ 170
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alex13104
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2020
🚨︎ report
I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control.

I thought to myself "Well, this changes everything"

πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2020
🚨︎ report

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