The wife looked concerned when my son showed an interest in electricals at the age of 5.
He asked about the neutral wire.
I said "don't worry, its just a phase."
My boyfriend told me as I walked in “hey don’t be alarmed but the toilet is smoking”. Concerned, I walked into the bathroom and found this:
The farmer was very concerned when his cows got into his marijuana crop.
As far as baby chickens are concerned...
Torque appropriated circumstances call for -in kind- repeat applied force when concerned with most of yer dried and salted pork products and jovial responses.
I’m concerned about next year...
I heard it’ll be 2020 too!
A man came in my tech repair shop complaining his nail had damaged his windows laptop and was concerned it wouldn't work anymore
I told him not to worry- he's only scratched the surface
I'm concerned about getting trumped in this election.
I’m concerned after catching my son drinking brake fluid.
He says he can stop whenever he wants.
The baker was concerned...
that her bread dough was not rising properly. But that was the yeast of her worries.
My friend was concerned his children weren't getting very far...
...which is why we built the larger trebuchet.
During her first pregnancy my wife was concerned with how much labor was going to hurt.
I told her don't worry about it, he came out of me first and it felt fine.
I had concerned friends message me
A wizard dad became concerned that whenever his son went to the bathroom, he wasn't giving himself privacy.
One day, the dad went to use the bathroom, thinking it was unused. There was a loud crash and he sighed, staring down at the scattered mess on the floor.
"Please, son," he said, "will you quit leaving the door a jar?"
Why weren't Mexicans too concerned about Trump's border wall?
They knew that they would eventually get over it.
Before I became a dad, I was truly concerned that I wouldn't know how to be a good father
Thankfully, turns out it's in my blood. I come from a long line of Fathers.
I'm a turnip, turned down. Concerned, but I don't carrot all. I am what I yam. What am I?
It's ok to be concerned about this virus.
I mean even the Sun has 'corona-sphere'
I'm concerned people aren't staying in and taking the whole stay at home order seriously
Car dealerships have more cars in their lots than ever!
My buddy was concerned about his chicken crossing the road.
I said his concerns are poultry.
Really excited to be going to this rock concert, I'd love to crowdsurf but I'm slightly concerned
I might get a bit carried away.
The doctor looked at me with a concerned look on his face and rasped, "Sir, I'm afraid your DNA is backwards."
Why was the new butt plug concerned about the used butt plug?
Because it had seen some shit.
There was an accident in the Paleontology section of a Natural History Museum where multiple dinosaur skeletons collapsed and were broken beyond repair. The directors of the museum were concerned that visitors wouldn't visit that section anymore ...
but visitors still showed up to view the
Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.
I totally understand those concerned moms talking about video games.
I mean, that epic music really is disturbing! So many sax and violins!
Doctor! Doctor! I'm really concerned about this mole on my shoulder!
Doctor: I'm a Dermatologist, not a veterinarian.
My daughter and I were playing on the beach today when I picked up her small bucket and stared at it for a long time. Puzzled, she asked, "Daddy, what're you doing!!?" Sounding concerned, I said, "Your bucket is sick!"
Surprised, she asked, "How do you know?"
I replied, "Well, it's a little pail!"
My boss has been on my case for my unusual use of punctuation, but as far as I'm concerned, it's my asterisk.
The caretaker walked into a class room and all of the kids ran out screaming. Concerned, he asked the teacher if the kids were alright. She replied...
I dropped a can of olives and my wife was concerned, so I replied...
"Don't worry, I didn't spill olive them."
Concerned about boyfriend's dad-joke abilities. Is he a secret dad?
Boyfriend and I went to Portillo's (Italian Beef sandwich place in Chicago) and ordered sammies.
While we were eating, I started a story with the phrase, "so, I kind of have a beef with..."
He pauses, looks down at my now-empty sandwich wrapper and responds with,
"well, you had a beef..."
Also, I've stopped asking him to call my phone when I misplace it because I'm tired of the "what do you want me to call it?" response.
Boy and I have been together for...8 months or so, dad-jokes only got super frequent recently - men of /r/dadjokes - is this a condition that occurs after several months of dating? Please help.
:)
What did the concerned friend say to the anxious guitarist?
My eye doctor is concerned because I keep walking headlong into objects...
He thinks it's a matter of life and depth.
Salt Lake City is concerned that too many teens are rebelling by going "Goth"
I was starting to get concerned that my pony was having trouble neighing
Then I realized it’s probably because he’s just a little hoarse
A patient was initially doubtful of the success rate and concerned about her upcoming heart transplant, but after some reassuring...
She had a change of heart.
Who is concerned with international public health?
Why is the English common law so concerned with property rights?
Because the English gentry insisted on proper tea rites every afternoon.
Being concerned for my promiscuous friend, I introduced her to my priest.
But it’s like my dad always said, “You can lead a whore to Father, but you can’t make her think.”
I'm concerned about grave marker and tombstone sales
It just seems like a dying industry...
We were concerned we wouldn't be able to close the flu during dinner
My wife looks over at the fire and says, "It's just embers now"
"Emberasing"
Wife, to my daughter: "Daddy wants a divorce!"
These days, doctors are not too concerned about bird flu outbreaks.
I'm concerned about this sub.
The only jokes all year are about new years.
I've been walking around in 20F weather in shorts. People are concerned about hypothermia...
...but honestly, I've been pretty chill about it.
My dad slipped on a patch of ice today. Being the concerned son, I ask 'dad, are you alright??'
To which he replies 'no son, I'm half left'
I'm concerned about my friend's declining memory.
Friend (after eating a cookie): Man, I can't remember the last time I had a homemade sugar cookie.
Me: Really? It was just a few seconds ago!
(massive groans)
My dad is concerned with being politically correct.
Dad: You can't call them ghosts anymore, they're Apparition-Americans!
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