While my kids were colouring with markers I fell asleep on the couch. The little buggers thought it would be funny to draw all over my face to make me look like "the devil". I woke up and went to the grocery store to do our weekly shopping & didn't realise what had happened until I got home.
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︎ Apr 01 2020
I accidentally drank a little food colouring last night. I ended up dying inside.
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︎ Feb 05 2019
MRW I see someone give a person with Parkinsonβs a colouring book.
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︎ Oct 29 2018
Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food colouring.
The doctor says I'm okay, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.
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︎ Nov 03 2017
Paul McCartney has decided to admit he's getting older and stop colouring his hair and has been spotted with his new grey mop top
Before he got dye with a little help from his friends
Now it can't dye me love
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︎ Jan 25 2019
Some colourful puns
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︎ Jun 27 2019
Help needed for a colour pun
I'm currently developing a game for my studies based on the old windows Game Pipe Dream (or Pipe Mania). It is two player and competitive where each player works for one of two rival companies. The game has a steampunk theme and each company is represented by a different colour. Green is Greenpunk Industries. I need your help, pun masters of reddit, in coming up with a pun for the Blue company.
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︎ Nov 10 2014
I wasn't expecting to be diagnosed as colour blind.
It really came out of the purple.
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︎ Feb 02 2021
According to ancient Japanese lore, your aura takes a particular colour when you die.
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︎ Feb 05 2021
What is the colour of wind?
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︎ Jan 19 2021
I've just bought my wife a new coat, that's all the colours of the Spectrum.
Black, with grey rubber buttons.
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︎ Jan 28 2021
I bought a chameleon and it wouldn't change colour....
The vet said it had a reptile dysfunction.
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︎ Jan 22 2021
What's a cat's favourite colour?
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︎ Dec 07 2020
Did you hear about the guy who makes comics out of tiny colourful plastic discs?
He is a sequintial artist.
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︎ Dec 17 2020
My least favourite colour is purple
I hate it more than blue and red combined
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︎ Oct 09 2020
My friends were talking about what different colours grass they preferred.
I told them they were being gracist.
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︎ Dec 11 2020
If a speck of colour on your clothes is called a stain,
Is paintball a form of Enterstainment?
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︎ Jul 27 2020
In the store I saw some brightly coloured greeting cards that said, "I will always love only you "
They sold them in packs of 12.
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︎ Nov 09 2020
Just some jokes about colours
Whatβs orange and sounds like a parrot?
Whatβs brown and sounds like a bell?
Whatβs green and smells like red paint?
Whats red and bad for your teeth
I was diagnosed with colour blindness today,
- I tell you, that came right out of the purple.
Colours making a phone call...
Green green, green green....Yellow!
What colour is the wind
Whatβs grey and canβt fly
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︎ Sep 16 2020
Whatβs an angry dads favourite colour?
YELLow
yeah this is a shitty joke sorry
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︎ Sep 20 2020
Need Hella Puns
https://preview.redd.it/wa3s3ozxftc61.png?width=4500&format=png&auto=webp&s=04f10d36e95914e4d39ec2312ce5176a062911b1
Who thinks they're punny?! πβ β I sketched this Hellraiser holding a cactus and thought it'd make a cute Valentine's Day card. I'm in the process of colouring it and I want YOU to help me caption it.β
I've asked the question on IG (@ashrobertsondesign) but didn't get a lot of feedback so I'm reaching out here. Gimme your best prick, point, hell, etc. related puns n make it about love π₯
I'll choose a favourite from the comments and turn it into a FREE Valentine's Day card printable.
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︎ Jan 22 2021
Some colourful language right here
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︎ Aug 24 2020
You know that theory about no two people see colours exactly the same way...
Surely it's a pigment of their imagination ?
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︎ Jul 07 2020
Why couldnβt the colour blind man sell ice cream?
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︎ Jun 06 2020
Jesus was an automobile enthusiast and had a car he really loved. Everytime Jesus went to visit his parents, he would return with his car sporting a new colour
His father was a Carpainter
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︎ Jul 21 2020
I just went the doctors, turns out Iβm colourblind
The results came completely out of the purple!
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︎ Dec 09 2020
Colour me surprised.
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︎ May 05 2020
Still on colours.
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︎ May 08 2020
βMr. Bond, you are turning old and grey. Do you want to colour your hair?β
Bond: No time to Dye. Dye another day.
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︎ Apr 25 2020
Man looks everywhere for his colourful tie when his wife tells him "I'm afraid you can't wear it anymore". "Why?"
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︎ Jul 06 2020
"I was teaching my son colours while I drove him to school."
"Primary?"
"No, he's in college."
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︎ May 19 2020
What colour is a bear's socks?
They don't wear socks.
They have bear feet.
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︎ Jun 09 2020
My colour blind friend told me there were only two kinds of people in the world.
I told him to stop seeing things in black and white.
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︎ Jun 09 2020
What colour's the wind?
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︎ Jun 28 2020
What's blue in colour and not heavy?
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︎ May 29 2020
The colours red, white and blue are the colours of freedom.
Until they are flashing behind you.
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︎ May 09 2020
What colour is an instruction to cry out in pain?
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︎ May 23 2020
Credit goes to Puns on Facebook. I am partly colour blind and this is fβin funny!
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︎ May 11 2018
My friend, Hugh, asked me if I was colour-blind.
"Where are you?" I replied.
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︎ Apr 20 2020
BREAKING NEWS The M6 has become blocked after a truck shed its load of brightly coloured writing paper and envelopes...
Police say the traffic is pretty stationery.
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︎ Mar 26 2020
Every time my wife gets her hair coloured at the hairdresserβs, she records it on her phone.
I think she watches the highlights later.
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︎ Feb 26 2020
I was doing shots of food colouring last night.
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︎ Sep 01 2018
I drank some food colouring yesterday.
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︎ Sep 12 2018
I think I swallowed some food colouring.
I've dyed a little inside.
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︎ Jul 22 2016
According to ancient Japanese lore, the colour of a personβs aura changes when they die.
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︎ Oct 31 2020
According to ancient Japanese lore, the colour of a personβs aura changes to cyan before they die.
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︎ Dec 17 2019
Barber: Mr. Bond, you are turning old and grey. Would you like me to colour your hair?
Janes Bond: No thanks. Dye another day.
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︎ Dec 27 2019
According to ancient Japanese lore, the colour of a personβs aura changes to cyan before they die.
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︎ Jun 01 2020
What color is the wind??
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︎ Jun 06 2020
It is said no two people see a colour the same
It's al just a pigment of your imagination
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︎ Apr 17 2020
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