I attached a coloring book to my shoulder when I went to the funeral

Just in case someone needed a shoulder to crayon

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BunzarTheFuzzy
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2019
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What’s a coloring book’s favorite drink?

crayonberry juice

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ExcelOceans
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2018
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I red a book about colors...

it blue me away!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fdaas403
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2021
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What's a book's favorite color?

Read.

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/electropriest
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2018
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Iron Bowl humor

Q: Did you hear that U of Alabama's library burned? A: It's true! They lost all 3 of their coloring books!

Q: What do you call a beautiful girl on campus at U of A? A: A visitor!

Q: What do a maggot and a U of A fan have in common? A: They can both live off a dead bear for twenty years.

Q: How many Alabama fans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: 80,001. 1 to change the bulb, 80,000 to talk about how great the old lightbulb was.

Q: How do you make Alabama cookies? A: Put em in a bowl and whip em for 60 minutes.

Q: Did you hear Saban was going to dress up 20 players for the Iron Bowl? A: The rest will have to dress themselves.

Q: Alabama is changing their mascot to the Opossums. A: They play dead at home and get killed on the road.

Q: What do Alabama players get on their SATs? A: Drool.

War Eagle!!!

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joblessidiot420
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
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West Virginia Capital Building Fire

Took out the whole trailer park. Library too. Both books are gone. Wife wasn’t done coloring one of them.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/baddad19
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2018
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He believed it for years!

As a kid I loved to get the sunday comics from the paper and read Calvin and Hobbes. I loved it so much my parents would get me the compilation books as gifts for birthdays and christmas. I always thought it was funny when Calvin would ask his dad how "x" works. One day my son when he was about 6 years old asked my why some TV shows were in black and white. Inspired by this calvin and hobbes comic where Calvin's dad explains why photos are black and white. http://picayune.uclick.com/comics/ch/1993/ch930919.gif

I decided to do the same thing to my kid. I told him that the world was black and white back then and that things didn't start to become in color for decades later. I got a good chuckle out of it, but because he was so young, I didn't realize that he actually believed it. I soon forgot that I told him the world was black and white. When he was about 11 or 12, one day I got a call from my wife and she asked me, "Did you tell your son that the world used to be black and white?" I start laughing immediately and said yes! How did you know? She said because your son is writing an essay about how the world used to be black and white for school and he asked me what year the world became color. He believed that for like 6 years!

πŸ‘︎ 534
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jimillett
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2015
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1001 Dad Jokes

My brother's wife recently gave birth to a beautiful baby boy, and being a new father, my brother and dad sat down to talk. I heard my brother expressing his concerns about being a new father, and all the challenges it would bring. My dad just smiled and put his hand on my brother's shoulder, pulling out a big, goofy colored book titled '1001 Dad Jokes.' With this, my brother began to tear up. He looked at my dad and said "Dad...I'm honored." My dad, with some tears of pride in his eyes as well sniffled and said...

"Hi honored, I'm Dad."

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThatOneRussian
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2013
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My Boss is a Dad

Today my boss, who is white, was talking to our book keeper tell her that he was going home for the dad because he is feeling sick. The book keeper told him yeah you look bad you have no color in your face. With lighting fast dad reflexes he quiped, "that's be cause you're looking at these guys all day"

Me and my coworker are both black and groaned appropriately.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dinobones1
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2014
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