I don't think the coast is clear just yet
πŸ‘︎ 680
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ohsureyoudo
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
🚨︎ report
I don’t trust people on the west coast who don’t like seafood.

There’s something fishy about them.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Digomansaur
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28
🚨︎ report
An American ship is sinking off the German coast.

The captain goes to use the radio to get help and says β€œwe’re sinking! We’re sinking!”

The German operator answers β€œwhat are you sinking about?”

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoamTheSHEEP
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04
🚨︎ report
Me and my friend were going to a costume party. He told me he was coming as a small island off the coast of Italy

I said don’t be Sicilly

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 19
🚨︎ report
What type of person most likely gave the US part of the west coast?

An Oregon donor

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Draykonslayer
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
🚨︎ report
My Friend is going to a fancy dress party and said he's going to dress up as a small island off the coast of italy...

I said don't be Sicily.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/matimo123
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2019
🚨︎ report
It used to be free to fill your car tire up with air. Now it coasts 1.50. You know why?

Inflation.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HoshForce
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Just reached the coast of Labrador, looking for signs of retrievers.

(what my dad texted me from the airplane home)

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lucidDreamcast
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15
🚨︎ report
What did Justin Timberlake say when the lead singer of Weezer asked him to name a major peninsula on the northern coast of the Black Sea?

Crimea, Rivers.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/underdog_rox
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend said to me he wanted to become a small island off the coast of Italy

I said dont be Sicily

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JRHMUK
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Why couldn't the coast guard rescue the hippie?

Because he was too far out

πŸ‘︎ 123
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wookslayer69
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2018
🚨︎ report
"How long do you think it would take to walk across the entire US, coast to coast?"
  • Oh, wow. I don't really know, maybe a year?

  • No son, May be a month.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Packiestan
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2018
🚨︎ report
So I was given the ability to fly the other day, decided to give it a whirl over the pacific. Little did I know how tired I was getting but just in the knick of time I saw a remote location that looked deserted off the coast, so what do I do?

Island.

πŸ‘︎ 158
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Snaaaaaaaaaake
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2017
🚨︎ report
People on the West Coast are so overdramatic.

It’s 2019 here, you gotta stop living in the past.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Red1474
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Why doesn’t anyone want to live on the West Coast of South America?

Because it’s Chile...

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2018
🚨︎ report
A man came up to me and said he was going to dress up as an island of the coast of Italy...

...I said "don't be Sicily"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Just_John_
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2018
🚨︎ report
What did the Coast Guard say to the hippy?

You're to far out man!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/4abcde
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2018
🚨︎ report
What does santa do when he's driving around the coast of california?

Santa cruz

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Vi3ual
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2018
🚨︎ report
I've always wanted a narrow land bridge between Hampshire and an island off the south coast of England.

I'm dreaming of a Wight Isthmus.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlRedux
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2018
🚨︎ report
Mussels off the coast of Seattle test positive for opioids

If they had tested positive for marijuana, would they be baked mussels?

Mussels off the coast of Seattle test positive for opioids

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/IchWillRingen
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2018
🚨︎ report
Which coast of Antarctica has the most shoreline?

The north coast

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bew132
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2017
🚨︎ report
A U.S. Naval ship is sinking off the coast of Europe

As soon as they found out they were in trouble, they started over the radio, β€œMayday, Mayday, We are Sinking, I repeat, We are sinking!”

A little while later the German Coast Guard responds, β€œ Allo, zis is zee German Coast Guard, Vat are you sinking about?”

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wizardofozmak
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2018
🚨︎ report
To those living on the west coast

Happy Wester!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/omart3
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2017
🚨︎ report
At the beach, I told my GF I woke up early in hopes of seeing dolphins off the coast, with no luck.

"Well babe, I guess I woke up early for no porpoise."

She normally loves puns but all this got me was a eye-roll and a groan.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/heyitsmecolku
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2017
🚨︎ report
Parents visited the lighthouse at the coast

Dad said it was the highlight of his trip

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RawrHaus
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2016
🚨︎ report
My friend just told me that for Halloween, he's dressing up as the Archipelago off the southwest coast of Britain....

I said, don't be so scilly.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Manson_Girl
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2015
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about all the banana stands opening up along the east coast.

To me, this just sounds like a bunch of monkey business.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/icrose33
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2016
🚨︎ report
What do you call only listening to West coast rap?

No Biggie.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kiro0613
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2016
🚨︎ report
Tropical Storm Colin is soaking the coast...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sixmilesoldier
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2016
🚨︎ report
East Coast Represent!

Last night my wife and I were getting some of our things together in preparation for a vacation this weekend.

Wife: there's just too much to pack

Me: Yeah, it's not a Biggie

Wife:... shakes head sadly

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VanTil
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2014
🚨︎ report

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