My Bluetooth speaker wasn’t working so I threw it into the lake.
The other day my dog fell into a lake and was drowning. Then some German guy came out of nowhere and saved his life
After I thanked him, he said to me: "Don't vorry, just dry him off and keep him varm, he vill be fine"
I asked him, "Are you a vet?"
He answered, "Am I vet? I'm soaking"
What do you call Walt Disney standing on a frozen lake?
I can't take my dog to the lake anymore because the ducks keep attacking him.
That's what I get for buying a pure bread dog.
When asked if he had family in Salt Lake City, Robert de Niro replied,
If Lake Superior is a wolf and Lake Michigan is a squash, what is Lake Erie?
Why can't the lake have two docks?
Because it would be a paradox.
I drove around Lake Superior last Fall...
It had me fondly thinking back to the time years ago when my friend Mitchell and I toured four of the five Great Lakes one summer.
I wonder if I’ll ever see Mitch again?
I spent all morning at the lake photographing birds. Enjoyable but I didn’t see a thing.
Why did the chicken cross the lake?
It didn't. Chickens can't swim.
A guy brings his friend to see his new lake house. When they get there, they see a goose on the front steps.
The friend says "hey, is he yours?"
The guy replies "yep, kept him after I found him alone by the lake. He can't communicate with any of the other birds."
His friend looked confused. "Is he mute?"
"No. I think he speaks porch geese."
I can't think of a better way to cross the lake
A man is out ice fishing, but not having any luck. But he sees a guy across the lake pulling out fish after fish.
So the man goes over and says “I’ve been watching you catch so many fish today, but I’m getting nothing. What’s your secret?”
The other man says “Mffffmmm mmmm mfffmmmm mmmmm”
The first man says “What?”
The other man spits something into his hand and says “I said, you gotta keep your worms warm!”
My friend bet me money that I couldn’t name a Great Lake.
I dropped my phone in the lake...
What is the coolest lake in the world?
Lake Chad...
slow motion sunglasses in front of explosion.gif
My friend keeps asking me if I’ll help him build a dock behind his lake house, even though I keep telling him “no.”
Honestly, I’m feeling a lot of pier pressure.
How to Catch a Polar Bear: 1)Find a frozen lake 2)Dig a hole in the ice 3)Surround the hole with frozen peas 4)Hide nearby.
When the bear stops to take a pea, kick it in the ice hole!
Be careful if you go swimming in Philosophy Lake.
I was at the lake, and I had a really bad feeling about the dock.
I was just trying to enjoy a day out on the lake. No matter where you are, you can never escape the puns.
Went fishing with a friend that wanted to throw rocks into the lake
I told ‘em we should just skip it
Had to tell my family we can't take the boat to the lake cause my truck broke down. Fortunately, avocado.
While we were out on the lake, my girlfriend swore she saw a bird dive into the water...
What do people who like to annoy grammar snobs call it when you leave the Great Lakes unprotected?
The reason lakes are bigger than rivers is because one has running water whereas the other water is merely standing.
How does the flower cross the lake
I lived in Salt Lake Utah
That makes me a SLUT resident
why didn't the indie lake make a games platform
it was afraid of becoming steam
I keep thinking about how fun it would be to get a couple friends and go out to the lake. Maybe rent a pontoon boat.
I dunno, I’ll float the idea by my brother.
Why did the hipster fall in the lake?
He went ice skating before it was cool.
Standing in a lake in Africa.
I told my friend I was standing in a lake in Africa. He exclaimed to em "no you're not, your in de-Nile!" sorry all.
How does a flower get a boat across the lake?
We were camping near the lake and my wife wanted to go canoeing...
She asked: "Which paddle should I take? The short wooden one, the long metal one?
I replied: "Doesn't matter, its either-oar situation"
I threw my iPhone to the lake the other thay
I once hiked to a lake with the states of Michigan, Ohio, Pennsylvania, and New York on its western, southern, and eastern shores. Not a bird was singing and the lake was still...
I saw a boat out on a saltwater lake!
Right now everyone in Cleveland is taking social distancing very seriously. Even the walkway around the lake is empty
What is the lake's favorite season?
I wanted to teach my goldfish to jump, so I took it to a lake in the mountains
But it turns out spring water is just false advertisement
I took my dog to the lake to day and noticed he floats very well
I had to give a guard a toy before I was allowed to go fishing in the lake...
I guess that's the Fisher Price.
My Bluetooth speaker wasn’t working so I threw it into the lake.
Why did the hipster fall into the lake ?
He went ice skating before it was cool.
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
