My Dad made the best (or worst) Dad joke at our Christmas Dinner

Cousin: I really want a dog this year.

Wife: What kind do you want?

Cousin: I’m really wanting a poodle.

My Dad: Just wait until it rains. There will be plenty of β€œpoudles” around.

Everyone else : πŸ™„

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WeepJangler
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
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Meanwhile, at our Christmas dinner table...

Me: "So I've decided to give up studying medicine to become a yoga instructor."

Mum: gets up, pushes her chair in and leaves the dinner table

Me: "Nah, ma! Stay!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/haymalb
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2019
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I'm addicted Christmas Dinner leftovers...

...but it's hard to give up cold turkey.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GrandMakai
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
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For Christmas dinner, we all had a bowl of alphabet soup.

Unfortunately, in my soup, there was Noel.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JohnnyZillion
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
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An old couple were eating dinner on christmas eve.

The old man was cheery and happy while his wife did not share his joy. The old man said; "honey why're you grumpy? It's christmas!" She said; "but deer look! All our crops are dying if this goes on we won't survive the winter. We need a christmas miracle for that." The old man looked outside and said; "Honey, look a christmas miracle!" The old lady got filled with glee and looked outside, and there was santa flying in his sleigh. She said; "But honey was wasn't hoping for santa in his sleigh, I was hoping for rain-dear!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DinoDongo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2019
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What fish should you serve for Christmas dinner?

A hollybut.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheScarletSho
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2018
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After finishing Christmas dinner

My daughter is now eating the left over gravy from the jug with a spoon. Mrs points out how much she's eaten, to which I replied... "If we were to crash on the way over to granddads later and she needed a blood transfusion, they'd need to use type Beeef Positive!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/helin0x
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2016
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My Great-Grandpa at Christmas Dinner

Great-Grandma- "Did you get another plate?" Great-Grandpa- "No. It's the same one."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/YiteMoka
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2013
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Dad is peeling potatos for Christmas Eve dinner..

..and none of the newer peelers are working for him, so he grabs the peeler he's had for years.

Dad: None of these peelers work as well as this one. There's a reason I buy and keep things like these.

Me: So you would say that one is most appealing to you?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Flintose
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2013
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Dad joked by my uncle after Christmas dinner

Uncle: Do you know why a lion never cheats?

Me: Why

Uncle: Because they're bad at it.

Me: Oh, is that so?

Uncle: Yeah, but tigers are great at cheating.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrHGScience
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2013
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Dad jokes at Christmas dinner

As the family was gathered around the table for Christmas dinner, I asked my dad to make a toast. His response was: "there isn't any bread".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MegaComrade53
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2014
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Dad's Christmas dinner zinger

So my family are eating Christmas dinner together a few days early, when my mum innocently asks for the stuffing. Dad turns to me, "hey mate, your mother wants stuffing!". I lost my appetite.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Draygn
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2013
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Made the Christmas dinner.

Ok so the context is our family's big Christmas dinner, almost everyone is sitting at the table ready to eat. We always start with a prayer. Mom: Okay everyone before we start eating, would somebody say grace? Dad: GRACE!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/timboslice00
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2013
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Wouldn't be Christmas dinner without a terrible Dad joke.

My brother was talking about his new torque wrench, and my dad says "You should be careful with that", and, as we all glare at him, waiting for the punchline, he says, "Didn't Miley Cyrus get in trouble for torque-ing?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/goodgod-lemon
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2013
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Dad just walked in the door before Christmas dinner

Him: Who is Santa's favorite singer?

Me: I don't know...

Him: Elf-is Presley

This is going to be a long day.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/obso1337user
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2013
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Sitting at Christmas dinner with the family

Aunt: There's to be gale force winds tonight.

Dad: It's all those Brussel sprouts

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlickBoogie
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2013
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My dad at christmas dinner

Dad: Get some hot potatoes now, otherwise they'll be gone. They go like hot potatoes...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/yknow_that_guy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2013
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