I believe instead of 911 or 112, in case of a medical emergency you should call 12345678
Because that's the proper First Aid number
Why should you write “republican” in lower case?
Because they don’t deserve to be anywhere near the capital.
My friend found a custom pc case shaped like a boat.
I told her "I hope the USBs are portside"
In case you're feeling crummy.
Given that a case of the sniffles means staying home from school, we give my daughter a daily allergy medicine. My wife was giving her breakfast before school, and when I walked out, I asked if she’d had her medicine yet.
My daughter said yes, and I replied, “So you’re de-Claritin that you’ve had it already?”
All this stress lately has me trying new things. For example, I've discovered that brake fluid is actually delicious. I'm up to a case a day, but there's no need to worry about me.
Are all cases U2's lawyer does...
Why did the case of the toilet bandit go cold?
They had nothing to go on.
What's the president's backup plan in case the USA gets invaded?
Why is there no COVID cases in Antarctica
Because it’s so ice-o-lated
A Harper Lee novel on trial refused to open up about their case case, but was still judged by it's cover.
Moral of the story... Don't kill animals.
Edit: remove one case
Why do detectives tend to scrutinize individuals with bluish eyes in cases of poisoning?
Because the real killer is usually cyan-eyed.
The deaf girl didn’t show up to her court case yesterday
The lawyer always kept losing his cases
He didn't mind cause he was practicing
What do cops do when handed a cold case?
They work on it undercover.
Why aren’t there any COVID-19 cases in Antarctica?
Because they’re all ice-olated.
My ADHD medicine comes in a case shaped like a 3-sided polygon where each side is the same size, and the pills are distributed uniformly.
It's an equal Adderall triangle.
From the mouths of babes (in this case my seven year old daughter as I was leaving this morning...)
Daughter: Dad, it's really STUPID out there today. You'd better take your dumbrella.
Me: I've never been more proud.
My favorite Hollywood movie has to be “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”.
At the hospital they’re taking virus cases on a ‘first catch’ basis...
It’s in a corona-logical order.
Johnny Depp has lost his case against The Sun newspaper even with evidences
Hard to win if Amber is Heard and Johnny is not
This case has been a stain on our reputation.
We need to solve it quickly. Send for Det. Urgent
Just wrote a book about falling down the stair case
It's a step-by-step guide
The German government is calling for everybody to stock up on sausage and cheese in case of a second lockdown.
It's the Wurst-käse-scenario
With the increasing cases of Covid in America, I was worried there would be a shortage of paper towels.
But I found the grocery story to be Bounty full.
Why there's no COVID Cases in Antartica
-Cause they're ICE-O-LATED
Why did Stalin only write in lower case?
He was afraid of Capitalism.
I wasn't able to carry my case.
I recently opened a building with an exhibition of dermatological skin cases.
It’s a real gallery of the fine warts.
Initially the US was way behind other countries in COVID-19 cases.
Little did those countries know, the US had a Trump card.
Does anybody know how many COVID-19 cases they have in Antarctica?
None. Because they’re Ice-o-lated.
No one knows for sure how many Covid cases there are...
An English professor was telling his class that a double negative makes a positive, but there was no case in which a double positive creates a negative.
From the back of the room a Physics professor said, "Yeah, yeah."
I wonder why the corona cases are so low in Deutschland
I mean, its called Germ-many
So Poland's dealing with a surge in the number of the novel coronavirus cases. Can we say that the Winged HusSARS arrived?
The audiologist had his malpractice case thrown out.
The judge ruled the evidence was all ear-relevant.
Just in case you haven't seen this before.
Did you hear about North Korea shutting down because of a Covid case?
It turns out Kim Jong is not the il-est.
My friend found a custom pc case shaped like a boat.
I told her "I hope the USBs are portside"
Why are there no cases of Covid in Antarctica?
Because they're so well Ice-o-lated.
Why isn’t there any COVID-19 cases in Antarctica?
Because they’re ice-o-lated.
Why are there no cases of COVID-19 in Antarctica?
Because they're ice-o-lated
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