The mortician asked the deceased’s wife how she would like the body dressed. He points out the man looks good in the black suit he’s already wearing. The widow however said she thought her husband always looked his best in blue, and she would really like him in a blue suit. She then hands the mortician a blank cheque and says “I don’t care how much it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing.” The woman returns the next day for the wake. To her delight she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe. Remarkably, the suit fit him perfectly. She says to the mortician, “whatever this costs I’m very satisfied, you did an excellent job and I’m incredibly grateful. How much did you spend?” To her astonishment the mortician presents her with her blank cheque, and he says “there’s no charge.” Shocked she replies “no really, I feel like i must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit.” “Honestly ma’am”, the mortician says, “it costs nothing, you see a diseased gentleman about your husbands size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday. He was wearing an attractive blue suit. So I asked his wife if she minded if her husband went to the grave wearing black. She had said it made no difference so long as he looked nice. So from that point on it was really just a matter of switching the heads.”
Because Batman has sworn to protect goth ham
It really came out of the purple.
You look for fresh prints
He seems to have his moments
He said, “Sorry. There is no Time.”
are 'Tolkien White Guys' in the movie
Well, it’s black and white.
The MOO-vie theater...
My next challenge is a green sock.
The Father responds with: “You bet your ass!”
...because everything is Rushin' to them.
...adding insoles to ninjary.
A crow with a machine gun
I like it, leather with a nice buckle.
Half a watermelon
Patrick the Panda.
Hopefully I'll C Major improvement!
It was the pot calling the cattle back.
Edit: Thank you for the awards.
I was expecting this to go noticed like most of my other posts. You peeps rock!
Everywhere else it has stripes.
When he arrives he sees the security guard at his desk, sobbing
“I c-can’t believe the boss forgot my b-b-birthday”
Seeing this opportunity, the thief sneaks round to the back steals the security codes and goes to access the vault.
Unfortunately for the thief, the head of the bank was busy giving a tour to some possible investors and is at the vault.
Upon seeing the thief (who is stupidly dressed in horizontal black and white stripes) he exclaims, “HOW DID YOU GET PAST MY SECURITY!!?!”
To which the thief replies, “You let your guard down”
Nothing they grab is ever returned.
At the end of the day, it's night.
A white penguin is coming towards you, while a black penguin is walking away from you.
He said "I'm going to choo choo"
Well I am.
"Hey dude, how've you bean?"
A penguin in a blender.