Everyday biology pun

What do you get when you mix picture day with writing a biology essay?

photos-and-thesis

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dwright124
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2019
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Give me your best biology puns/jokes
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πŸ‘€︎ u/theotherpurple
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2014
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Help, biology pun needed

Hi guys, I need a pun involving bacteria and electricity for a school project, such as plug n plasmid, bactronics etc, it's for a modular biological circuit project

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ollieburton
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2016
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What was the name of the janitor at the French marine biology school?

Jacques Custodian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bridgeonjames
πŸ“…︎ May 24
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Everyone remembers the mitochondrion from biology class. But who remembers the Kite-o-Mondrian?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mcdj
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16
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What are the requirements to work in marine biology?

Your grades need to be above C-level

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πŸ‘€︎ u/evac95
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14
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Why did the biology teacher and the physics teacher split up?

They had no chemistry

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dex_77
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04
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Why did the biology teacher break up with the physics teacher?

They had no chemistry πŸ₯Ί

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πŸ‘€︎ u/x_graveyard152
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2019
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The marine biology seminars weren't for entertainment,

but were created for educational porpoises.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GobAteMyHamster
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23
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β€ͺDid I ever tell you about the premonition I had in Biology class?‬

‬ It was a cell fulfilling prophecy.‬

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πŸ‘€︎ u/allanon101
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2019
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We were having a biology lecture about Pavlov's dog

We laughed and we laughed then the bell rang and we all went to the cafeteria

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pabloescobar9000
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
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My biology teacher asked "What's heavier, the Indian or African elephant?"

I said "The elephant obviously!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kangamooo
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2019
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When you're brave and they're not in Biology class, you learn that...

Dissection is the better part of valor.

Love,

Kermit

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πŸ‘€︎ u/seudonim
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2019
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My dad found out that I am at risk of failing biology

He told me, β€œIf you fail at biology, you fail at life.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/yeezuhzz
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
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My Biology lab presented a slide show about using a microscope.

It was called "how to focus" but I wasn't paying attention to the rest.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HAJpodge13
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2019
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Biology jokes

What do you call a closted bottom

A substrate

Its horrible ik

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2019
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A Biology Classic
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yerdawizard
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2018
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I walked into the biology lab, and saw my lab partner dissecting an insect.

I said, β€œI think your fly is open.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2019
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Dear punners, my biology class has to decorate our door. We will make a bunch of snowglobes out of petri dishes. But i need Pun! Help?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/keishii10
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2018
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A Marine Biology student was compiling a list of all the sea creatures they could find on Wikipedia. The next day they handed it in to their Professor, who took one look at it and said..

Lacks Cetacean..

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Irorii
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2019
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Tomorrow's my biology practical exam and I don't know how to chemically test for glucose

I'm so gonna be Fehling the test

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πŸ‘€︎ u/killercatto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2018
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My biology teacher was late for class today.

I guess she missed her period.

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2018
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The local school board just purchased a powerful new microscope for the high school biology lab...

It's completely changed the way students look at life!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2019
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Biology joke
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iammei
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2018
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My sister just dropped her Biology textbook on my foot.

MY TOE SIS!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/koske
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2019
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A researcher working in a biology lab is brought two insects to dissect...

A cricket, and a tick.

He decides to start with the larger one, the cricket, and proceeds to put it under a microscope and carefully rip the dead insect apart writing down the results. Nothing unusual.

Moving on, he goes back to the delivery petri dish and notices the tick is missing.

He searches around for some time but the bugger is nowhere to be seen. Just before giving up he notices it crawling on his hand. Before the tick can bite him, he expertly grabs it and throws it under the microscope.

He turns it to the highest magnification and says to himself: "Let's see what makes you tick."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MoffKalast
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2018
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Puns from biology
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rayraegah
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2018
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Biology Dad Joke

My Bio professor was teaching us how to press plants for our field journals. He kicked off the lecture with:

"Well, let's get down to the pressing business, shall we?"

Out of a room of twenty people, one person laughed. That person was me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AnorexicBuddha
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2014
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I retired from marine biology today...

Now my life has no porpoise.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/breadispain
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2017
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I once met someone in the Biology Lab..

he sure was a fungi.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/yourdose
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2018
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We learned about nervous tissue in biology today.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/flameoguy
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2014
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What do you call a cat with a PhD in Marine Biology?

A Doctopuss.

Thanks.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/silwat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2017
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I received my grade for my Marine Biology class....

It was below C level.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Godzilla_KOM
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2017
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As I was putting together a skeleton in my biology class, I held onto my table's skull...

Not paying attention, I nearly dropped the skull. Without skipping a beat, I said "Whew, nearly lost my head for a second there!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ansakicus
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2017
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Biology teacher pun

Teacher: How does Juliet maintain constant body temperature? Class: Ummm..... Teacher: Romeostatis

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nicolas--
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2014
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I failed a quiz in biology class. There was a question on the parts of a flower...

and i didn't know the anther!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BuckSturdley
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2017
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What do Jedis learn in biology class?

"Midichlorians are the powerhouse of the Force"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jrdbuch
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2017
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My Dad is a former Biology teacher...

I was telling my family that my friend's dad, James, had recently gotten a vasectomy. Without missing a beat my dad exclaimed "If he were a plant he'd be a Jim-no-sperm!" and laughed uproariously while the rest of the family just shook their heads.

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πŸ“…︎ May 15 2014
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My biology professor caught us with this one at the end of class

How do you make a hormone?

You leave without paying

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tattered
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2015
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Dirty biology dadjoke.

So while tutoring a Biology study group, (mind you, they are 18-20 year old guys and ladies I'm 24 and married) I was explaining a hard concept to the group, and a girl exclaimed: "Jesusdo, you're hard!" Because apparently I wasn't making too much sense...I responded with: "Thanks, but I prefer to receive that compliment from my wife though" That girl's face went redder than a tomato the same with everyone else's and much laughter was had. :)

Edit: autocorrect messed up my username.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jesusdo
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2014
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Biology Lab involving Plant Eggs

My friend was disgusted about cutting up the plant to see its egg, so I told her to stop ovary-acting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WillfulWilliam
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2015
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Dad told my biology teacher a marine life joke.

It was otterly embarrassing! I think he's made anemone.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AtMetaphase
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2015
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I was studying biology with my dad

Dad: "What would you call the plate without the ampicillin?"
Me: "The control"
Dad: "And what if it were really far away from the other plates?"
Me: "Um, I don't know"
Dad: "The remote control!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/buckets41
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2014
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Biology teacher pun part 2

Teacher: What did one daughter cell say to the other daughter cell when she stepped on her toe?

Class: Umm....

Teacher: That's my toe sis! (Mitosis)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nicolas--
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2014
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The author of my biology book must be a dad

http://imgur.com/ZNeesEp

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2014
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Dad joked by biology teacher

Q: How do you determine the sex of a chromosome?

A: You pull down it's genes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gaymommy
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2014
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My brother is a biology student...

After having completed his internship on bowel diseases, he was talking about the primary function of the colon. When he was finished, I helpfully added that the colon has the added purpose of indicating that you were about to start a list. "For example, 'colon', item one, item two, item three..."

The groan/glare he gave me was quite a reward!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nmukerjee27
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2014
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AP Biology teacher was giving us a verbal quiz, when a question with the answer "hormones" comes up.

After several fruitless attempts at trying to get us to say "hormones," he cracks this one:

"What noise comes out of a brothel?

Whore-moans!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mydogsnameisdixie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2013
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I have a biology exam tomorrow..

Enzyme shitting myself.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jordosaur
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2013
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