Bill and Melinda Gates got divorced. Melinda got the house...

But Bill kept the Windows

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ScubaPride
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
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Ughh..shut up and bill my purchase...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WetSoggyTaco
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2021
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Bill Gates meets Arnold Schwarzenneger at a party and asks him if he's upgraded to Windows 10 yet? Big Arnie replies.......

"Ah still love Vista Baby....."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ipoointhepool
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2021
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Asked my contractor why he didn’t bill me for my new roof

He said β€œDon’t worry about it, it’s on the house!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JAK-the-YAK
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2021
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Five years back I couldn’t pay my electricity bill, those were the dark days of my life
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chiniandspice
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2021
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Without Bill,

Melinda will be just an ionaire.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RayInRed
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2021
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My friend just can't afford to pay his huge water bill...

I've just sent him a 'Get Well Soon' card.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2021
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I heard Bill and Melinda Gates are getting divorced.

Apparently he refused to ever empty the recycle bin.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Meerkat_Mayhem_
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
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Why did Bill and Melinda Gates divorce?

They argued about who will clean windows.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/danielsoft1
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2021
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I was going to make a joke about Bill Gates Divorce but I decided not to..

It’s not PC

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πŸ“…︎ May 06 2021
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Melinda was going to sue Bill for not giving her the amount of money she wan entitled to

So Bill said: "A lawsuit? For real? You know I always windows"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/omarkrimlyreddit
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
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Every one wants to know why Bill and Melinda divorced

But sure the Gates won't open up.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chihiro_yoru
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2021
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Bill Gates: Hey Melinda, can I keep the MS Office as part of the divorce settlement?

Melinda Gates: Bill, ...you have my Word.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2021
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I like to stuff dollar bills in my belt.

They tell me it’s a waist of money.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kshep1188
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2021
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I know Bill Gates is going through a tough time right now.

I just hope he will accept my cookies.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
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Melinda moved out from Bills

I hope someone remembered to update their drivers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/THPSROCKS
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2021
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What do you call a wreath made with $100 bills?

Aretha Franklins

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jigsatics
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
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About bill and melinda

So, Bill and Melinda Gates are getting a divorce She gets the house and He gets the Windows!

According to Melinda Gates, Bill just didn't Excel at his marriage. Apparently he had no Power Points while arguing, but he always had to have the last Word And now that he no longer had Access to her heart, the Outlook was not looking good for them. They couldn’t work together as Teams On the Surface they were a perfect couple, but deep down there was hardly any Kinect. He kept everything hidden like an X-Box and she never found it re- Azuring. The main reason she divorced Bill Gates because he was in Office365 days.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sq009
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2021
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What do you call 454 dollar bills?

A pound

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheeMainEvent
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2021
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I was a little shocked to find out that Bill and Melinda Gates are divorcing.

They seemed so happy..on the Surface.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
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In college, my roommates and I were so broke that we couldn’t pay our electricity bill.

Those were the darkest days of our lives.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2021
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Bill Gates and his wife are separating

Guess his dick was micro-soft

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pronepali
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2021
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How does cereal pay its bills?

With Chex.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FunPeach0
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2021
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Can we start gossiping about Bill and Melinda Gates now?

Or is that not PC?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nightwingpianist
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
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What does the genie say when you wish for a $50 bill?

I’ll β€˜Grant’ it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PonianYoutube
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2021
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What do you call a lady who refuses to pay her bills?

Bernadette.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nerscylliac
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2021
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My landlord texted saying we need to meet up and talk about how high my heating bill is.

I replied back: β€œSure, my door is always open.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Daudelin1
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2020
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Why can't bill gates get married?

Because he was micro-soft

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Major_Cupcake
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2021
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I heard Bill Gates is really unsure if he'll ever find love again. But as the old saying goes...

there’s plenty more Phish in the (C:)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SammDogg619
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
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Did you hear that Bill and Melinda Gates are getting divorced?

He threw her out the Windows. He Excels at that. He wants a Word with his lawyer. He's PowerPointing her to the door. I guess they just weren't on each other's Teams.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/clutchdeve
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2021
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THIS JUST IN: A man is still in critical condition after swallowing $100,000 in large bills.

No change is expected

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πŸ‘€︎ u/junerlegion
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
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Bill Clinton is banned from all the French bakeries in his neighborhood.

He kept feeling their pain.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2021
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I just finished painting a customer’s home and they were surprised with the bill...

Them: β€œYou’ve factored in all the labour, but what about the paint?” Me: β€œIt’s on the house”

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2021
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I opened my wallet and got confused when I only saw paper bills..

It doesn't make any cents.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/borsken
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2021
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Growing up, there was a time my parents couldn't pay the electric bill.

It was the darkest day of my life.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/elster000
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2021
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What do you call a woman who sets fire to all her bills ?

Bernadette.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
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Thousands of people have found the device that can cut their electric bills in half......

Scissors.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/denandbil
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
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My son wanted to glue $20 bills to his belt

I told him that would just be a waist of money

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πŸ‘€︎ u/phresh_69
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2021
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I once made a belt out of one dollar bills.

It was a waist of money.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/deeporange_j
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2021
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What do you call a wreath made of $100 bills?

Aretha Franklins

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Imnotarobot12764
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2020
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My friend couldn't afford to pay his water bill

So I sent him a "get well soon" card

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedCakesYT
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
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My friend couldn't afford to pay his water bill.

So I sent him a "get well soon" card.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VVIIVVI
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2021
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I just spoke with Bill Withers and told him "Ain't No Sunshine" is poor grammar.

He said "I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know..."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/klwill1192
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2021
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My friend said that he couldn't afford to pay his huge water bill....

So, I sent him a 'Get Well Soon' card.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
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What do you call a woman who sets fire to all her bills?

Bernadette.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2021
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I once made a belt out of dollar bills

It was waist of money

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JPXR_
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2021
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