He does awnings and blinds, and I think I live him.
👍︎ 122
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📅︎ Jun 06 2019
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Why is it so hard to see a police officer standing beneath an awning?

Because he's under-cover!

👍︎ 6
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📅︎ Mar 09 2018
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Mom and her son

A woman and her 12-year-old son were riding in a taxi in Detroit. It was raining and all the prostitutes were standing under awnings.

"Mom," said the boy, "what are all those women doing?"

"They're waiting for their husbands to get off work," she replied.

The taxi driver turns around and says, "Geez lady, why don't you tell him the truth? They're hookers, boy! They have sex with men for money."

The little boy's eyes get wide and he says, "Is that true Mom?"

His mother, glaring hard at the driver, answers, "Yes."

After a few minutes the kid asks, "Mom, if those women have babies, what happens to them?"

She said, "Most of them become taxi drivers."

👍︎ 18
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📅︎ Jul 24 2020
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When someone says their friend runs a shady business...

"Oh, you mean like awnings or something?"

👍︎ 5
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👤︎ u/Dartmuthia
📅︎ Nov 20 2015
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Hail in Michigan

I recently went with a bunch of friends to see a hockey game at the University of Michigan. If you don't know, everyone who goes to that school is obsessed with their fight song which is titled "Hail to the Victors".

Anyway, we get outside the arena and then a torrential downpour starts. Our group runs underneath a bus stop awning thing to wait out the storm.

Then loud cracks start to be heard. Frozen rain has started to fall everywhere.

We look around at each other.

"Hey guys..." I say.

Everyone tenses up. I see the disappointment on their faces. They know what is about to come out of my mouth.

"Hail to the Victors!"

👍︎ 8
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👤︎ u/dbarts21
📅︎ Oct 30 2013
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