All these hot shingles are from r/memes
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GingerManBearPig
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2019
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I need me some hot shingles
πŸ‘︎ 197
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Azreila
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2019
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My dog initially barked when the people installing my shingles started then barked again as they finished...

Re-roofing complete.

*Edit: reworded punchline. I think it might be better said "replacing my shingles" but I cannot for the life of me edit that part...

*ahem* without hacking.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2020
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Roofing a new barn with my daughter. "Hey, you know that song about women roofers?" (No....) "Yeah you do - Shingle Ladies."

It's on the album "The Roof is For Hire"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sunstoned1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2019
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I need some hot shingles
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πŸ‘€︎ u/glitchomojo
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2019
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Chicken pox parties are for kids. Adults go to a shingles bar.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/siphodeus
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2019
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Why was the dog stealing shingles?

He wanted to become a woofer!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cool-kid103
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2019
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I got the sack from the Dermatology Clinic for misdiagnosing shingles...

Which I thought was a little rash.

From Dad Joke of the day on facebook.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2019
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I was told there were hot shingles in my area...

Looking to get nailed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/maggierette
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2018
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Some asking my bio teacher what would Shingles evolve into...

He said " Roof tiles"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bowye
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2018
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Shingles

Singles with lisps.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RavalTech
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2018
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My dad has come down with a bad case of shingles...

.. which is weird because that usually only affects my roof.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Moe_Bot
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2018
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My little sister has shingles

And my older sister and I find it fairly funny. I'm chuckling to myself and my little sister says

>What are you laughing at?

I, in a stroke of genius, respond with

>Nothing. Not a shingle thing.

Me and my older sister laughed, my little sister just looked at me like I'm stupid.

I hope this is worthy of being called a Dad Joke.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Moonhowler22
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2014
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My girlfriend was diagnosed with Shingles recently..

Me: I'm sorry babe give me a hug :(

proceed to lift her

Her: What are you doing?! Me: Just raising the roof babe.

sighs

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kohlio
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2014
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A little moron and a big moron were shingling a steep roof when suddenly the scaffolding collapsed. They both slid down the roof and stopped at the very edge, and then one fell off. Which one?

The big moron. The other one was a little more on.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/big_macaroons
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
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My neighbor shingled my roof for free

He said it was on the house

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πŸ‘€︎ u/michaelveyrocks
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2020
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2 pebbles washes up on the beach. One says to the other, "Are you married?"

Other replies, "No, I'm shingle."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
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A roofer was decapitated today while telling a dirty joke to his co-worker

I'm not sure what the joke was, but somebody should get his head out of the gutter.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kcsmurf112
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2020
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Have you heard Beyonce's new track dedicated to Scottish roofers?

"All The Shingle Laddies"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fritzdkat
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
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My Girlfriend's Dad Said This While Shingling The Roof

"This roof is poison. One drop will kill me!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zippedlightning
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2014
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My wife and 2yo were just watching Paw Patrol. There is a cow mooing into a cell phone to video chat with the team to ask for help for a cat stuck on the roof.

I told my wife "That cat would have way more grip on roof shingles and I expect more I realism from talking cartoon cows. This is "UDDERLY" ridiculous."

She may have buried her head and avoided eye contact for a bit. I was proud.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/trich101
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2020
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They delivered materials for our new roof today. I looked out the window, confused. Said to my son, β€œhuh, that’s weird. There are several pallets out there. He asked why that’s weird.

I was just expecting a shingle pallet

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The1hangingchad
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
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Today I found out that roofing in the summer heat can be really dangerous.

WARNING: HOT SHINGLES ARE IN YOUR AREA.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2020
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Why did the house go to the doctor?

It was having window panes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
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What's the biggest perk of being a roofer?

There are hot shingles in your area

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2019
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Why Don't Roofers Like Getting Married?

Because they prefer the shingle life!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IAmXChris
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2019
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What do you call a nearby roof that's been in the sun all day?

Hot shingles in your area.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bloodredrogue
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2019
🚨︎ report
What to hear something that only anti-vaxers will get?

Tetanus

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πŸ“…︎ May 05 2019
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Why was the roof so lonely?

It's always shingle.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mastrwill
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2019
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I don’t understand how people build roofs

It’s all over my head

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bboosic
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2018
🚨︎ report
The doctor did a culture test on me and it came back positive!

For shingles :/

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Colorado87
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Daughter: Dad, can my girlfriends and I start a Roofing Business?

Only if you call it "All The Shingle Ladies"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/onejdc
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Someone told me a joke about the tops of houses

but I didn't laugh a shingle bit

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gnhhjmmnnbggh
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2019
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Why was the old house in pain?

It had shingles.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gabriel3334
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Did most roofs have chickenpox as children?

Because now they have shingles.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DeanHinkle
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2018
🚨︎ report
What did the roof say to the other roof?

Are you shingle?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrIca
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2018
🚨︎ report
Roofing jokes get to me

...every shingle time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SoDakZak
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2017
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Two thieves stole all of the roof tiles from the village church...

It was a separation of church and slate.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KZedUK
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2014
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My house is sick ....

It has shingles.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chris92057
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2017
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I saw a targeted ad selling roof-cooling services.

Looks like there are hot shingles in my area.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Level_51
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2018
🚨︎ report
Why was the roofer sent home from work?

He had shingles.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/She_Likes_Cloth
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2017
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My dermatologist prefers payment in large bills

But all I have is shingles.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ALinchpin
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2017
🚨︎ report
my neighbor shingled my roof for free

he said it was on the house

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/michaelveyrocks
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
🚨︎ report

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