An ape joined a monastery but couldn't get in.
He was missing his monk-keys.
what do you call it when apes battle?
gorilla warfare.
I went to the zoo and saw 2 massive hairy apes, covered in cream and cherries on their heads..
Apparently they were Meringue-utans.
What do you call it when a group of apes start a company?
Monkey business
If monkeys start stealing clothes from everyone it'll be the Rise of the planet of the Dr'apes'
Did you hear about the ape that got bullied because of his low status?
He was a norankutang.
My friend did not believe in the existence of underwear for apes.
I told her to looked them up and showed her on the internet .
I said "Ha!... Chimp pants, see?".
A new study is showing surprising advances in primate evolution: Dr. Thomas Ink, a researcher in southern Africa has found certain groups of apes 'brewing' alcohol by leaving old fruit to stand in water pools then drinking from it and becoming inebriated.
Dr. Ink has dubbed these 'Monkey Bars'.
Did you guys hear the news an ape opened a tanning salon in Bangkok I know heard he named it “A Range Of Tans”
What do you call an ape that knows martial arts?
King kong fu
What do they call the golden ratio on the planet of the apes?
The gibbonacci sequence
What's the scientific name for Apes...
I guess it starts with "Hom-"? i no idea
What do you call south american apes that get quickly delivered packages?
amazon primates
What do you call an ape that likes to barbecue?
Grill-a
My wife came last in the Pun About Apes competition.
I might gorilla about it when she gets home.
What do you call an ape made from tobacco?
A cigorilla.
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes soundtrack is prodigiously punny! (X-post from /r/movies, thought you guys would appreciate) en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daw…
I heard the ending of the new giant ape film is really good
It has the best Kongclusion.
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes OST
- "Level Plaguing Field"
- "Look Who’s Stalking"
- "The Great Ape Processional"
- "Past Their Primates"
- "Close Encounters of the Furred Kind"
- "Monkey to the City"
- "The Lost City of Chimpanzee"
- "Along Simian Lines"
- "Caesar No Evil, Hear No Evil"
- "Monkey See, Monkey Coup"
- "Gorilla Warfare" 7:37
- "The Apes of Wrath"
- "Gibbon Take"
- "Aped Crusaders"
- "How Bonobo Can You Go"
- "Enough Monkeying Around"
- "Primates for Life"
- "Planet of the End Credits"
- "Ain’t That a Stinger"
dad said this at Rise of the Apes last night
During the charge scene he leans in and says
"Talk about guerrilla warfare"
what do you call it when apes battle?
gorilla warfare.
