My masterpiece! (Answer/pun in comments)
A Kung Fu student asks his teacher, "Master, why does my ability not improve? I'm always defeated." And the master, pensive and forever patient, answers, "My dear pupil, have you seen the gulls flying by the setting sun and their wings seeming like flames?"
"Yes, my master, I have."
"And a waterfall, spilling mightly over the stones without taking anything out of its proper place?"
"Yes, my master, I have witnessed it."
"And the moon, when it touches the calm water to reflect all its enormous beauty?"
"Yes, my master, I have also seen this marvelous phenomenon."
"That is the problem. You keep watching all this shit instead of training."
Every day I come home and ask my dog how his day was, and every day he always gives the same answer...
I asked my hiker buddy about where his last adventure was, but he couldn't answer me.
Wanted a unique name for our new pet dog and asked a friend for ideas. His answer?
My coworker asked what it’s called when you ask something but haven’t gotten an answer yet.
I told him that’s an outstanding question.
I guess it's time to answer the call of Nature..💩
My dad’s answer to everything is alcohol....
He doesn’t drink, it's just that he's really bad at crossword puzzles...
No Concrete Answer Given.
An answer in a listening test was "specific background material" and a classmate asked if it was ok to just write "background material"
The teacher said it had to be specific
My dad's answer to what came first, the chicken or the egg?
The one you ordered first.
We have a joke calendar and we missed this week, my wife was having me guess the answers and we ended up accidentally creating this gem: what do you call a cow that was just born?
I keep asking iris why some people have dyslexia, but she won't answer.
Maybe my iPhone is just broken.
A guy is walking through the woods one day when he comes across a suitcase. He takes a look inside, only to find a fox and her cubs. So he calls the ASPCA and tells the woman who answers what he’s found...
She says, “Oh, that’s horrible. Are they moving?”
The guy replies, “I don’t know, but that would explain the suitcase.”
I've been on edge today searching for the answer.
I usually use Chrome, but today I'm on Edge.
The answer is what happened
Violins is never the answer
Sry I dont answer my phone on 9/11 . . .
I keep it on airplane mode.
I was on a game show and the final question was "What do you call a 3D painting made out of plaster?" I couldn't think of the answer and I was worried I'd lose all of the money. Then I got it right!
More than math and physics can answer
The DJs at prom don't techno for an answer
Answer: Sis, boom, bah.
Question: What is the sound of an exploding sheep?
Any time I ask my dad how he learned Braille, he refuses to give me a straight answer.
For him, it’s a touchy subject.
Confucius knew the answers to all of life’s questions.
The same cannot be said of his twin brother, Confusion.
A woman in the shower hears the doorbell. "It's the blind man". So she answers the door naked...
"Nice bewbs! Now where do you want me to hang the blind?"
I asked my daughter which state she likes most in the USA, but she didn't answer!
It's ok, Alaska again later.
Still can’t find the answer
Answer the question woman!
Somebody asked me to describe my life as an amputee, but I couldn't answer.
Think of a number between 5 and 15. Multiply by 2, add 3, and subtract 7 from the answer. Now close your eyes.
I asked my friends what is Potassium and was expecting an answer
But she clearly didn’t understand the question because she only said “K.”
Why is 6 afraid of 7? (The answer is not what you are thinking)
Not what you are thinking.
I asked my friend what he was doing with all the cement he bought. He didn't give me a concrete answer.
My girlfriend left me because I didn't answer her when she asked me for an eleven letter synonym of "complex".
I think the President has all the answers on COVID-19...
Ok babe, I have a question. I'm pretty sure the answer is no...
...but what is the opposite of yes?
My son told me to answer my phone.
But it didn't say anything.
What is the best gift you can give someone? Answer: a broken drum...
My son turned 21 today and as we were about to share our first drink together, I wisely advised him, "Remember, vodka may not be the answer..."
"...but it’s worth a shot."
A cowboy comes to his boss his ranch and says 'thats all 50 cows boss'. The boss answers 'how did you get 50? I only got 48!'
The cowboy answers 'I know, I rounded them up.'
I want to start a trivia game show for rednecks where wrong answers cost them their hair.
I'll call it "Mullet Over"
I wanted to know how to build big muscular shoulders. I tried asking a guy with big traps at the gym, but I still have no answer...
...every time I ask him, he just shrugs.
Every day I come home and ask my dog how his day was, and every day he always gives the same answer...
My dad’s answer to everything is alcohol.
He doesn’t drink, he’s just terrible at crosswords.
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