Ancestry Puns

I'm waiting on the lab results!

So I’m well hung.

Now I can’t even look myself in the mirror.

It was due to the bounty on his head

these are all real. Some are made by me, some are not (ones with an "*" are mine.).

/r/NoPuns is a sub where posting puns will get you a ban.
/r/NoNoPuns is a sub for people banned from /r/NoPuns.
/r/NoNoNoPuns is a sub for people who weren't. *
/r/NoNoNoNoPuns is a sub where puns are mandatory.
/r/NoNoNoNoNoPuns is a sub where requiring puns is banned. *

A good pun is like a good cake: it has many layers. Subreddits are the same.

The AKC deems that a different sort of pet-degree.

He said he was a tadpolish.

ancestry.com

Your ancestry.

I work with another dad, and all day we trade off dad jokes cracking each other up. This one is from yesterday

Paul (the other dad) was asking about a new fixture we had at work. it was explained it was a highly sensitive camera used to test the polarity of magnets. I then came around the corner and Paul wanted to tell me about it.

Paul: "This is a new thing from Ancestry.com. I can stand by it and it will tell me what percentage Polish I am"

Me: Wow, although I have a similar thing right inside of me. My stomach can tell me how Hungry I am!

My friend and I were talking about our ancestry a little bit and she mentioned that she was French. So I said, "oh that's cool I didn't know that". She then replies by saying "Oui, I am 1/8 French". Seizing the opportunity I say to her, "Oh, so you have a little oui oui in you then huh?" We laughed for much longer than we should have.