A list of puns related to "Amends"
It's called the Santa Clause
They were triggered.
If you are against the second amendment, you could get fired.
I call it "The Right To Bare Arms"
Don't they have a right to bare arms?
The 1st amendment is the right to freeze peach.
Dont thread on me.
But I'll take a shot at it!
Because he loved his bear arms
Freedom of SCREECH!
Although it's lovely to receive such high praise from HMRC, to be honest I can't even remember sending one in.
His Chief of Staff explained to him that in the US, the First Amendment guaranteed all citizens the right to free speech, and that yes this did indeed include unflattering depictions in newspapers' editorial cartoons.
"You will be a simile, Ted"
No appeal
Say what you want about the 1st amendment...
"Yes, Your Honor, my client ripped the arms off of every teddy bear in the store. But as I recall, the second amendment states he has the right to bear arms."
If I were her attorney, I could get a not-guilty verdict using the First Amendment. She was exercising her freedom of expression.
Because according to the 2nd amendment.....the hunter has the right to bear arms
Her: "Zevran, you're next few levels are going to Constitution..."
Me: "He needs a Bill of Rights."
Bonus: "How many amendments are you going to give him?"
I'm currently stuck in traffic on the way to dinner with friends. One of them looks over, sees a shoe store, and suggests that we could go shopping while waiting for traffic to move. He then amends with "but I don't see a soul in there". I replied with "there's plenty of soles in there!"
I got two laughs and a groan.
"Highly Wreck Amended."
Me (reading news): Huh, there must be an large Irish Priest named Margin...
Wife: Why?
Me: I just read "Voters in Ireland back amendment allowing gay marriage by big margin"
Wife: ...
Me: That's going to be one busy priest....
Wife: ... ...
So the joke goes "You know, James Madison was a naturalist. A lot of people don't know that. He really loved the environment and care a lot about wildlife. In fact, he tried to put protecting wildlife into the bill of rights, but a lot of people don't know that he was dyslexic too. So when he was writing the 2nd amendment he wrote the right to bear arms, but what he meant was the right to arm bears!"
Just went on a tour of revolutionary battlegrounds (truly amazing if you ever get the chance) and that joke was told in excess of 50 times, no exaggeration.
DAD: "Hey do you know who made Thanksgiving a holiday?"
ME: "Abraham Lincoln"
DAD: "Did you know he also invented Black Friday?"
ME: "Really?"
DAD: "Yeah, it was part of the 13th amendment"
Don't they have a right to bare arms?
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.