I miss my umbilical cord.. /r/Jokes/comments/edho39/โ€ฆ
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/mr_reddit95
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
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A guy just told me that my wife and my daughter look like sisters.

I told him, โ€œWell, they were separated at birth.โ€

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 27 2019
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My dad was telling the story of when I was born...

I was delivered via C-section due to the cord being wrapped around my neck. My dad was telling the story about how he was so scared for me and my mom, and then when I came out everything turned out to be alright. So then my dad says he went to cut my umbilical cord and the doctor screams "NO THATS NOT THE UMBILICAL CORD!" as he cuts it.

He's such a dick. No pun intended.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/mrjanuary
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 24 2013
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