Did you hear about the band that got cancelled by PETA for their album art featuring trees made of flesh?
They caught a lot of meatwood flack
I’m planning a paint themed party for my friend, any paint/art themed puns I can use for the invitations?
It's weird being colorblind in an art gallery. Everything's a pigment of the imagination.
Why did the art thief’s van run out of gas as he drove away from the museum?
Because he had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh
The Earth without art is..
What is the difference between an art installation and performance art?
Crap on your neighbors doorstep then ring the doorbell - that's an art installation.
Ring the doorbell THEN crap on his doorstep - that's performance art.
The Earth without 'art'...
I'm still figuring out how to properly wear a face covering. Before I could master the art I was robbed of my beloved mask...
It was stolen from right under my nose.
I went to an art gallery and noticed that all the info was also available in braille.
I just found out that Mercedes is donating state of the art street sweepers to some of the largest cities around the world to help fight littering.
They’re calling it Mercedes-clenz
The result of an art competition...
I just read in the newspaper: "Painting stolen from art museum found by a set of dustbins."
Those dustbins must be very intelligent.
I was pondering some of the practical arts that are dying out like silversmithing and coppersmithing.
One of the most tragic is the art of hand making exit signs which is really on the way out.
If Da Vinci saw the Mona Lisa in an art museum,
I think he would have Louvred it
Why was the art restorer sent to prison?
He was a Monet launderer.
Have you heard the news about the Art club going missing.
They disappeared without a trace.
What's the difference between baseball and Chinese martial arts?
In baseball, many men chew, but few men smoke. In Chinese martial arts, many men smoke, but fu manchu.
My dad was bragging about his new hearing aid. “State of the Art,” he said, “It cost me a fortune.”
I said, “Awesome. What type is it?”
He said, “ Two thirty.”
The only type of art that people despised
Thought you all might enjoy the art I made for new ears eve
Who improved the art of stealing to perfection?
I was going to get a tattoo in Madrid, but the tattoo artist I wanted to go to got in trouble for making some anti government tattoo art, which was quite a surprise
No one expects the Spanish ink sedition
He knows the subtle art of denial
Did you hear about the baker who started taking martial arts classes?
After only 4 weeks he was a black belt in Tae Kwon Dough
I re-skinned my drums with the skin my faithful steed Chestnut. I want people to reflect on the emotional connection between man and beast through the art of drum solos.
But my wife says I'm just beating a dead horse.
I was going to study the art of treating the body by rubbing and kneading my wife's body to stimulate circulation...
But then I found out that would be massage-ony.
The art critic had to see a podiatrist.
He was diagnosed with aesthetes foot. (OC)
why are the discarded papers that once held the halloween candy just like vocalists who have lost their rhythm, art, and poetry?
they are both empty rappers
Old man Art was planting flowers in his front yard. The homeowners’ association fined him $100.
Yard Art is strictly prohibited.
What did the tutor call the 4th year art student's work?
Art isn't mine but the pun is.
I would have won the art contest
I've been trying to read a book called "The Advanced Art of Lockpicking"
But I just can't get into it.
I am a huge fan of the art of cooking steaks.
When done right, it is a rare medium done well.
I made it to the final round of the Art Competition, but didn’t win.
It turned out to be a draw.
My friends always say contemplating the meaning of art is the most philosophical side to art...
But when I’m drawing, deciding “2B or not 2B” is the real question.
Someone should start a line of houses with state-of-the-art security systems
Call it "Sure-Lock Homes".
Why didn't the famous clock in the art museum work?
It was a timeless piece of art
Did you hear about the art competition?
The van at my local art museum...
If Metallica went to the Jim Henson school of Arts and Media...
Would they graduate with a Master of Puppets?
(Kudos to my brother for this one.)
The art forgeries were discovered when the heads fell off the statues
I gave the art restoration people very simple instructions
If it ain't baroque, don't fix it
Everybody at the martial arts dojo gets really excited about my car.
When I drive by, I can hear them shouting "KIA, KIA!"
“Hey did you hear about the martial arts class that only accepted people with one leg?”
It was called Tae-one-toe
I heard they finally caught the art thief
But I think he was framed.
What would the earth be without art?
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