I make a mean Tex Mex...

Statistically it's average.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KaPauw
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
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Why is six afraid of seven?

Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness.

Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary. Six is afraid of Seven because he is a damn psychopath.

πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
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How does Chipotle' inform their customers that their order is ready?

...by tex-mexage.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dmatlack1023
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2020
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Did you hear about the tornado in southern USA that was swallowing everything in its path?

It was called the VoreTex-as.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Deciperer
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2020
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Got my girlfriend while I was eating pie.

GF: Is your pie good?

Me:On a scale of 1-10 I'd give it a 3.14.

On a serious note though the pie was delicious.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/justinhood88
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2015
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Apparently I'm culturally insensitive

Me eating Girl Scout Cookies:
"You guys can call me Te Kā. Cuz I destroyed these Samoas."
Wife: "Go away... "

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Furryraptorcock
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
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I heard there’s a place on the border of Texas and Mexico that is making giant manned robots.

It’s called Tex-Mechs.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mortalfloater
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2019
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What’s the most accurate name for an Asian professor?

Te Ching

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SpaceCA18DET
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2018
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Chemistry Puns

Funny collection of chemistry puns

What do you get when you mix sulfur, tungsten, and silver? SWAG


Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now.


What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution.


How do Sulfur and Oxygen communicate? A sulfone


What do you call Iron blowing in the wind? Febreeze.


Why do chemists call helium, curium, and barium the healing elements? Because if you can’t helium or curium, you barium!


Why did the noble gas cry? Because all his friends argon.


Why did the acid go to the gym? To become a buffer solution!


Why can you never trust atoms? They make up everything!


Why does hamburger have lower energy than steak? Because it’s in the ground state.


How many moles are in a guacamole? Avocado’s number.


If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice? H2O cubed.


What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.


Why are chemists great for solving problems? They have all the solutions.


What element is a girl’s future best friend? Carbon.


I had to make these bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon.


Anyone know any jokes about sodium? Na


Why can you never trust atoms? They make up everything!


Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now.


What do you do with a dead chemists? Barium


What animal is made up of calcium, nickel and neon? A CaNiNe


What did the chemist snack on during lunch? A β€˜gram’ cracker.


What would you call a clown in jail? Silicon (Silly Con)


What weapon can you make from the elements potassium, nickel and iron? A KNiFe.


How did carbon propose to Hydrogen? With a β€œcarbonkneel”


What did one titration tell the other? Let’s meet at the endpoint.


How can you spot a chemist in the restroom? They wash their hands before they go.


Why are chemists great for solving problems? They have all the solutions.


Anyone know any jokes about sodium? Na


Why do chemistry professors like to teach about ammonia? Because it’s basic material.


Did you hear about the chemist who was reading a book about helium? He just could not put it down


Why do chemistry professor like to

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Punsville
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2017
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What are your favourite type of witches?

Mine are sand-witches

I'll walk myself out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KiRo88TheMLGNoob
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2016
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My friend claimed he was talking to his friend through a piece of bread.

He calls it the "te-loaf-one".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pokefan993
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2015
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What do you call Al Gore dancing?

An Al-Gore-Rythem

I actually thought of this in the shower and wondered if I should post it to /r/showerthoughts.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DISREPUTABLE
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2017
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Made a french dadjoke with my girlfriend.

French here, so the joke is in french, maybe some will still like it.

Ma copine me dit un soir: "oh merde, Γ§a m'endors !"

J'ai directement rΓ©pondu: "sinon tu peux faire un truc qui te Liechtenstein, ou qui te Monaco.."

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2015
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The worst case scenario
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sigfin
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2016
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Soybeans..

Hola, beans! Soy te padre!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SurprisedPotato
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2016
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Found on twitter.

http://imgur.com/nfmXzTE

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/samsweetmilk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2014
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My coworker got a good one in last night

The the kitchen I work in, two of the cooks normally have the local Latino top 40 station on the radio. Last night, a bachata song was playing on the radio, when one of my coworkers asked one of the cooks, Omar, about it. I noticed he had a huge grin on his face. I knew something was up.

Coworker: "Hey Omar, what is this stuff on the radio?"

Omar: "It's bachata, te gustas? [do you like it?]"

Coworker: "Oh yeah guey, I love horchata."

Omar then gives my coworker the much needed groan, while I laugh my ass off.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Etrex
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2014
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