Summer vacation ends early for my kids

Ever since I came into my wife’s kids’ lives (6 and 9 at the time) I would tell them at 2:45 the Friday before schools started next week β€œsummer vacation is over. It’s just a weekend now.” Now I have my own 1st grader as the other two are off to college. The cycle begins anew.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SPEEDYTBC
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2019
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I asked my dad about our itinerary for this summers vacation in the southwest. He said we will start at the south rim of the Grand Canyon.

It's the perfect jumping off point.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Synisive
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2018
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Where do cantaloupes and honeydews go for summer vacation?

John Cougar's Melon Camp

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πŸ‘€︎ u/palmal
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2017
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While on a vacation last summer, my brother-in-law was telling me that he just got a deal on some really nice empty wooden Cuban cigar boxes as souvenirs for only $4 each - I replied...

"So, it was a good deal, but no cigar"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/obedienthoreau
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2016
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My son unintentionally dad joked my dad

So my dad (known as gramps) has taken my kids for a week for a fun summer vacation. While they were all eating at a restaurant, he texted me a conversation that took place:

Kid: "How do I know when my chocolate milk has expired?"

Gramps: "Look at the cap."

Kid: "Wow, they got this at best by!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vetokend
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2017
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Dad jokes at the old amusement park.

First day of summer vacation, pack up the family and bring them to Canobie Lake Park, a local amusement park.

We all get on the Ferris Wheel and the listen to the instructions:

Operator: "Please keep you arms and legs in the cart at all times, remain seated until the ride comes to a complete stop and please NO ROCKING!"

Me: "Awwww man, I was just abut to crank some AC/DC"

My family and the family in line behind us: ::audible groans::

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MikeTheBum
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2016
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About all that rain we've been getting...

My co-worker said: "You could almost call this a monsoon."
Me: "Yeah, but with summer vacations just around the corner, I'd rather have a monsoon than a monlater."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Paul_Cinnabunyan
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2015
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