I like my women like a pile of Lowe’s precut studs:

Cheap, stacked and knotty

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SunRevolutionary8315
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 13 2021
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Why is my stud finder constantly going off even when it isn't touching the wall?

Oh wait... I'm holding it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ndisa44
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 10 2021
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Got to stud-dee to get my de-gree in my fave subject, Pun-o-graphy !
πŸ‘οΈŽ 63
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/bornagain-stillborn
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 29 2020
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He's always been a stud, but I guess that wasn't enough for himshelf
πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/vaalhallan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 29 2020
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I went to the Home Improvement store this weekend and walked past the stud finders...

The noise was unbearable.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SerbianTarHeel
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 21 2020
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I was tool shopping yesterday, and happened to walk by the stud-finders.

The noise was unbearable.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/rwsdwr
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 27 2020
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Ordered a Stud Finder on Amazon and forgot to give them a shipping address.

Still made it to my door.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 49
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NoodleMaps
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 31 2020
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My friend got her leg pierced with a lot of diamond studs...

She might have a gam-bling addiction.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 19 2019
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Is the β€œStud Finder” joke the quintessential dad joke?
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Odinspawn2
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 05 2019
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So I held a stud detector up to myself.

It beeped.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/OneOfManyParadoxFans
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 28 2019
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My 10 year old stood a few feet away from me and asked... Dad? How far away is a stud?

...my mind raced with punchlines of the β€œabout this far” variety. I tried a few on for size.

Then I realized he was looking distraught and realized I was potentially stomping on his blooming dad-joke career. So I stopped and said: β€œI don’t know son, how far?”

He still looked confused, and then I realized that he for real thought a β€œstud” was a measure of distance and this was a legit question. So I had to transition into google searching images of wall framing and what studs are. What a roller coaster of dad emotions.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cid73
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 07 2019
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Hey ladies, are you looking for a stud?

Well, I got the STD now all I need is u.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 115
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HeyRustyTrueMemester
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 15 2017
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Stud finder

Was headed home from work to wall mount my TV, wanted to swing by my parents to get my dads stud finder. His reply is priceless.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Dougisfast
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 18 2019
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Wife asked me to hang some pictures, I said no worries I got a stud finder

But it always go off when I pick it up.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/EarthlyStranger
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 25 2018
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Hey Dad do you have a stud finder?

Your Mum found me, didn't she?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/4orbes
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 27 2018
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Got a stud finder for Christmas

We had to take the battery’s out.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kickahippo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 01 2018
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How can you tell when u have a stud seahorse?

You can tell by its scallop!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mariotaboatinghoes
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 07 2015
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"Dad, how does a stud finder even work? Does it just beep at the wall or what?"

"Oh, Alcoholicia, I have a hell of a time with them - they just keep going off every time I pick one up." - Dad.

"Oh well maybe I shouldn't buy one if I can't fig... Wait. Oh my God, Dad, you're so embarrassing." - Me

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Alcoholicia
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 06 2017
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How to do the stud finder joke - a step by step guide (may not work for all models of stud finder)

Discovered this today while hanging a curtain rod.

I am using the zircon one step stud finder, seen here http://m.acehardware.com//product/index.jsp?productId=1298011&KPID=997266&cid=CAPLA:G:Shopping_-Measuring_Tools/Marking_Tools-_New&pla=pla_997266&k_clickid=21a0e1ae-1f94-44cd-b27e-a6a83ba1fdc1

Begin by using the stud finder to locate a stud as normal. Release the button.

Lift the stud finder off the wall slightly and press the button. This will help calibrate the stud finder to "empty space", making it think that any hard surface is a stud.

Quickly place the stud finder on your chest, onto your breastbone, the stud finder should beep indicating it is on a stud.

Make joke as normal

This saves you from making the beep noise yourself, which, in my opinion weakens the joke.

This way the tool itself confirms that you're a stud.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jsgunn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 12 2016
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Stud Finder

Dad: Have you seen my stud finder? Me: Maybe it found a stud and lived happily ever after. Dad: tearing up I have nothing left to teach you.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jade_vk
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 22 2015
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Looking for some tools (variation on the "stud finder" oldie but goodie)

Wife asked me to hang up some new wall decorations she picked up. One was a little heavy so I wanted to nail into a couple studs instead of just using drywall anchors. She saw me rooting around in the garage and asked what I was looking for.

"My stud finder. Wish I could turn it on remotely so it would just find me instead!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/captainwoj
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 28 2014
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Stud-Finders

My brother, my dad, and I were getting ready to move, and we started talking about the different stud-finders we own. My dad says something along the lines of "We only have, and need, one stud-finder. Your mom is a great one!"

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Howzieky
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 20 2014
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Sister needed to borrow the stud finder

"Sure! Mom is usually done at work around 4."

My sister just turned around and left the house.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Everun
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 01 2014
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