My OCD stricken friend blows off stress by repeatedly hitting F5.

He says he finds it refreshing.

I told him he needs help, now he keeps hitting F1.

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👤︎ u/Rav4xle
📅︎ May 29 2020
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My friend takes time off work to go dig for water in drought stricken areas.

He has a well paying job.

👍︎ 3
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📅︎ May 16 2019
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What do the grief-stricken and tormented eat for breakfast?

Anguish muffins

👍︎ 3
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📅︎ Oct 21 2018
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Where do poverty-stricken Italians live?

In the spaghetto.

👍︎ 2
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📅︎ Oct 14 2015
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There's a local restaurant my family frequents called "Deja Vu".

"Have we been here before? I'm sure we've been here before." - Every male member of my family (including my Alzheimer's stricken grandfather).

Every time.

👍︎ 1k
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📅︎ Apr 06 2015
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Dumb uncle

A lady is 9 months pregnant and is in a car accident. Turns out she was pregnant with twins and they had to an emergency C-section. She wakes up the next day and asks about her babies. Nurse tells her that her brother showed up and he named them. Fear stricken because her brother is an idiot she asks the nurse to bring in the first one, a girl, nurse tells her that she was named Denise. She thinks to herself well that's not bad. What is the boys name? Danephew.

👍︎ 6
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📅︎ Oct 10 2016
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Dad Joke From One Dad To Another

I'm a dad, and I told my dad this, so I think it counts. It got a lot of groans, so I think it's great, if a bit long.


I once lived near a small, simple town where there lived named Hugh.

Hugh was a very smart man stricken with a series of personal tragedies earlier in his life. As a result, he moved to this small town and took a job in his local florist shop, relaxing the days away arranging flowers and trying not to think of times past. Hugh grew to love working there.

One day, a disaster struck the town. A small, single engine airplane crashed a block from Hugh's shop, killing those on the plane and setting fire to several buildings, both occupied and empty.

The impact ruptured a gas line, which ultimately exploded, creating a shock wave that caused part of the building next to the florist shop to collapse and trap several of Hugh's customers and co-workers inside. The situation was desperate, as the shop would be burned to the ground at any moment.

Acting quickly, Hugh located the gas main, shutting it down. Next, Hugh noticed a water storage tank nearby, and opened a release valve that suffocated the fire before it reached his beloved shop.

With the fire out, and the florist shop saved along with those trapped inside, Hugh was a hero. The town presented him with a plaque in honor of his courageous deeds. On this plaque was a detailed etching of a bear, and Hugh was touched because he loved bears. But it was the words etched beneath that truly touched him.

"Only Hugh could prevent florist fires."

👍︎ 5
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📅︎ Jul 08 2015
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