I'm lucky to have survived Mustard gas and pepper spay when I was in the Army.

I guess you could say that I'm a seasoned vet...

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2018
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[Request] Puns for spay/neuter veterinary surgery team.

Hello, I'm in Vet school and just can't seem to compete with some of my fellow students' surgery team names. As students, we work together to do spays and neuters for shelter animals. We like to use funny pun names.

Ideas that have already been taken: "Ovarian Cysters" "Dogtors at Your Cervix" "Eggs Ovary-Z"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ilostpoints
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2018
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Did you hear about the woman who refused to get her female cat spayed?

She was arrested for littering.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MidnightArt145
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
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My female cat just got fixed, but the vet insisted on referring to it as "feline ovarian removal".

Look, sometimes you have to call a spayed a spayed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
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Why don't pets make good astronauts?

They're afraid of the spay station

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cereal-soup
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2020
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If groups of kittens and puppies are called litters...

...is a failure to spay or neuter your pet considered littering?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zatchf
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2019
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My dad is very blunt about neutered pets...

He'll always call a spayed a spayed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlRedux
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2019
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Got my girlfriend to groan really loud with this one

We were talking about her cat and it went something like this:

Me: Is your cat spayed?
Her: Yep, poor Tubbie (the cat's name) has no uterus.
Me: Really? I thought they would have just tied her tubes instead of giving her a full "Hiss-terectomy"
Her: Groans for days

I am not yet a dad but one day I think I'll be decent at it.

Edit: formatting

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Joeisthinking
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2014
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Cat surgery

My wife is in vet tech classes and today they're bringing in a cat named Peekaboo from a local shelter . They're going to work with the vet on a spay surgery.

I told her to be careful so they didn't send the cat to the Peekaboo ICU.

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2013
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