How do you stop Canadian bacon from curling in a frying pan?

Take away its tiny brooms 🧹

πŸ‘︎ 330
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tthrivi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I left my job at the Chinese restaurant and took my favourite frying pan, until I heard the owner yell...

"Don’t wok away from me!"

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lovethebigones
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2020
🚨︎ report
My first dad joke. Why did snoop dog preheat his frying pan?

For sizzle

πŸ‘︎ 137
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/flushyjames
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s a frying pan’s favorite song?

Home on the range

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thegreatjamoco
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Today I bought a non-stick frying pan

I can confirm that there were no parts of a tree in the pan

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Spidery7
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Two sausages are frying in a pan

One sausage says to the other: "it's getting pretty hot in here"

The other: "WTF, a talking sausage!?"

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ipoointhepool
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2019
🚨︎ report
How is Europe like a frying pan?

It has Greece at the bottom

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ChillFamGgNoRe
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Wife is frying a lot of mushrooms in a tiny pan.

Me: Doesn't look like you have mushroom left in there.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2016
🚨︎ report
What did the astronaut see in his frying pan?

... an unidentified frying object

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DarkPhoenix07
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2015
🚨︎ report
Ok, this is a mom joke...

My stay-at-home wife came in earlier and asked what I wanted for dinner. "I don't know... You pick, you're cooking it after all."

A few minutes later she comes in with a frying pan. "Here ya go!"

It was a piece of paper. With the words "I don't know" written on both sides.

proof

... Smartass, lol.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/breakone9r
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the best kind of pan to make sushi in?

Japan

πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/oldie101
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2017
🚨︎ report
What do you call a monk who steals a grilled cheese sandwich right off the griddle?

Out of the frying pan and into the friar.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/allymeow
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I walked into the kitchen this morning and I saw my wife was cooking breakfast in her slippers again.

I thought to myself "I really should buy her a fry pan "

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AustralianGroan
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend was arrested for assault using an iron skillet

We'll see how this pans out but I think she's fried

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I hope this joke pans out
πŸ‘︎ 721
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/USCgamecocks
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2015
🚨︎ report
I'm turning my life around and joining a religious order.

I'm getting out of the frying pan, into the friar!

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kakulu_Mono
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2018
🚨︎ report
I just got a new flying pan

Don't you mean frying pan? No, it was made in China

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cybot2001
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2018
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend says she might be pansexual...

Here is a screenshot. Me and my girlfriend were texting each other:

Her: One day I do want to try having sex with a girl just to see what it's like, but I think I'm just really open minded about it. Or I'm pansexual which my dad thinks I am.

Me: -I send her a picture of a frying pan- So does this turn you on? I knew you liked cooking, but I didn't know they had a word for it.

Her: I'm gonna kill you -_-

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/J52
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2015
🚨︎ report
Person one: "Don't put the pots and pans in the dishwasher, it wrecks the anti-stick stuff. That's how I ruined that big pan."

Person two: "I guess you could say the anti-stick went out of the frying pan, into the water."

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hahaijoinedreddit
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2015
🚨︎ report
A dadjoke at the restaurant

Dad: "I'll have the steak diane"

Waitress: "How do you want that cooked?"

Dad: "like this" pretends to be shaking a frying pan whilst making sizzling noises

Waitress: Genuinely laughs

πŸ‘︎ 76
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/smallbrainbighead
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2014
🚨︎ report
What to do when it starts raining

"If you put a frying pan over your head while it's raining, it becomes a drying pan!"

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ArabianDisco
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2015
🚨︎ report
Got my girlfriend as we cooked last night

We were making tuna steaks for dinner, and she was looking for a particular pan in my cabinet.

Gf: "where's that deep frying pan.. aha!" (She found it mid sentence)

Me: "I believe it's pronounced ahi"

I could feel the stare she gave me without looking at her.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mossybeard
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2014
🚨︎ report
I'm a dad, this is one of my jokes...

An egg and some bacon were frying in a pan. The egg turns to the bacon and says "Phew, it's hot in here isn't it?" To which the bacon replies...

"Fuck me! A talking egg!"

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MrTomFTW
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2013
🚨︎ report
I was dad joked by a customer today.

I work at Goodwill, and while I was working register a customer came up to pay.

He placed a frying pan on the counter, and casually said, "Hey man. What's cooking?"

His significant other just rolled her eyes and walked off. We laughed like maniacs.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/waitn2drive
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2014
🚨︎ report
What dad joke gets a laugh every time?

I'm male and when people ask me about my family I tell them I have four brothers. "No sisters?" "Nope. I'm the only girl."

When I fry an egg for breakfast as I'm cracking the egg into the pan I say "Whoa! This pan is hot enough to fry an egg!" Although this one gets a laugh every time it doesn't really count because I'm usually the only person in the room.

πŸ‘︎ 46
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/agoatforavillage
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2013
🚨︎ report
How do you get Canadian bacon from curling in the frying pan???

How do you get Canadian bacon from curling in the frying pan???

You take away its little brooms!!!

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ciceronic
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2020
🚨︎ report
How do you stop Canadian bacon from curling in the frying pan?

You take away its tiny little broom!

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/derawin07
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2018
🚨︎ report
How do you get bacon to stop curling in the frying pan?

Take away their brooms.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/izzyjubejube
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the scientist see in his frying pan?

An Unidentified Frying Object.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/goshdurnshame
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2013
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.