Here's a 50 y/o pun on a magnet
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︎ Aug 29 2020
A pail o' puns!
1. What is the most important drink in life?
Vitali-tea.
2. What do you call an uptight man with wet tapestry?
A wet blanket with a wet blanket.
3. Describe an uptight man with an erection holding an alcoholic beverage.
A stiff with a stiff with a stiff.
4. What do you call introverted window blinds?
A shutter-in.
5. What do you call an uncooked deer cookie?
Dat doe dough 'dough.
6. What do you call a plant's religion?
Agri-culture.
7. What do you call a football players' phone charger?
A Charger's phone charger.
8. What do you call a clock tower striking twelve?
High noon.
That's all I got.
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︎ Jun 13 2016
Out-dadded by my 5 y/o niece
I'm staying at her mothers house, and she said, it's only 8:30 pm and everyone's already ready for bed.
My niece chimes in and says, "not me.", to which i respond, "You don't count."
Without missing a beat, she said, "Yes i do. One, two, three, four."
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︎ Oct 05 2020
What starts with 'O' and ends with 'nions' and sometimes make you cry?
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︎ Dec 05 2020
Is it o.k. to start drinking as soon as the kids are at school...
....or, am I a really bad teacher ?
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︎ Dec 15 2020
A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y,Z
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︎ Dec 25 2020
I believe I have made a hum(o)rous (c)omedic joke.
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︎ Nov 21 2020
What do you get when you divide the circumference of a Jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
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︎ Oct 26 2020
A little Christmas song. A B C D E F G H I J K M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L...
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︎ Dec 02 2020
How do you fix a broken jack-o-lantern?
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︎ Oct 12 2020
What do you call an 'O' on fire?
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︎ Nov 20 2020
11 year old named Kevin: I donโt know who Catherine OโHara is.
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︎ Dec 04 2020
Did you know that the Type O was actually meant to be Type Zero but....
It was misread to be Type O blood. I guess you could call it a typo.
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︎ Nov 24 2020
When Shaquille OโNeal gives you a birthday card, he always signs it with a reference to his favorite 80โs song.
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︎ Nov 20 2020
Recent father. Yesterday my wife told me we โwould be having dinner at around 6:30, 7 oโclockโ
I told her I might be running late and asked if we could make it 6:38 instead?
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︎ Oct 23 2020
What do you call a 60 y.o terrorist?
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︎ Nov 12 2020
My 7 y/o told me this one tonight: What did the manager say when he came out of the closet?
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︎ Aug 25 2020
Cardi O
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︎ Jun 18 2020
5 y/o: โhey dad, make some more jokes please
dad: โwhy do i need to make more jokes? iโve already made you
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︎ Oct 09 2020
How do you mend a broken Jack o' Lantern?
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︎ Sep 17 2020
O sh*t
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︎ Sep 04 2020
This is not oc content it MAY be a re p o st
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︎ Jun 20 2020
My imterviewer asked me why I put A, C, D, E, I, M, N, O, R, and T on my application.
I told him they were the letters of recommendation.
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︎ Jul 10 2020
I swear stairs are gonna be my d o w n fall, the way they keep s t a i r i n g at me...
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︎ Feb 06 2020
My favorite author is S.O. Teric
Youโve probably never heard of him.
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︎ Sep 21 2020
Teacher asked โWhat is the formula of water?โ Student said โH I J K L M N Oโ teacher said โthatโs not the formula of waterโ
Student said โyou said the formula was H to Oโ.
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︎ May 28 2020
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
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︎ Aug 09 2020
Got to stud-dee to get my de-gree in my fave subject, Pun-o-graphy !
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︎ May 29 2020
My 5 y.o. son walked up to me with his under armour shirt on backwards so the words were on the back.
He said, โI got back words!โ How did I not see that one coming?
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︎ Jul 11 2020
College offers some questionable class choices, but o you know which one is the most sketchy?
Art class: Pencil Drawing 101
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︎ Aug 09 2020
I'd rather have a full bottle in front o' me...
Than a full frontal labotomy
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︎ Aug 15 2020
Why is a Catholic Mass like The Gunfight At The O.K. Corral?
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︎ Aug 15 2020
My 10 y/o dad joke
He looks at me while heading to the fridge and says, "Hey mum I need ketchup to catch up on these hot dogs"
I laughed for several days and thought I would share it to make someone else smile.
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︎ Jul 27 2020
"Let me get this straight, you want me to write a kids song about a dog with a funny "name-o"
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︎ Aug 10 2020
What begins with o and ends w/ s?
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︎ Jul 04 2020
What did the O say to the other o?
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︎ Apr 19 2020
What did the letter A say to the letter O?
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︎ Jul 18 2020
What do you call "swiss cheese" w/o any holes?
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︎ Jun 05 2020
Itโs o-fish-ial
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︎ Jan 26 2020
Did you hear about the vegan who had O.C.D?
They always wanted everything to be just soy.
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︎ Jul 16 2020
All my baby says is A E I O U...
I have no idea where he picked up this vowel language.
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︎ May 15 2020
That line O-O
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︎ Jun 25 2019
What do you get when you divide the circumference of a Jack-o-lantern by its diameter
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︎ Oct 27 2020
How do you fix a broken jack-oโ-lantern?
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︎ Nov 17 2020
A, B, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, & Z are all racists.. How do I know?
Because they're all not 'C's.
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︎ Dec 11 2019
What starts with โoโ and ends with โnionsโ and sometimes make you cry?
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︎ May 23 2020
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