Did you hear? An attempted murder was foiled due to the assailant's severe grain allergy.
The killer was found, dead to rice.
What's the best way to prevent a murder?
A crow ... painting a murder.
Within minutes, the detectives figured out what the murder weapon was.
A group of geese is a gaggle, agroup of rats: a mischief, a murder of crows, bats a colony and men a crowd. What's a group of batmen?
Jokes about murders aren't funny
Unless they're properly executed, that it.
There was a murder on a train do you know if the suspect was caught?
No, he covered his tracks.
(Thought of this this morning go easy on me!)
I saw a murder outside my house today...
All the crows were just sitting in my tree...
How are mafia murders like candles?
Police are investigating a murder in which the victim was shot with a starters pistol.
The police think it's race-related.
Did you hear about the potsticker that went on a murder rampage?
It was an act of wonton violence.
Somewhere, between murder, and suicide........
There is a place called Merseyside - Milton Jones at the Apollo live
Sherlock and Watson arrived on the scene of a murder and the only clue was a measuring tape pulled out to exactly 12 inches.
Apparently something was afoot.
TIL that Mona Lisa was once accused of murder
A pencil isn't John Wick's primary murder weapon.
But it's definitely number 2.
A murder investigation or a murder investigating?
What do you call a murder in Greece?
Abortion isn’t murder
Its just cancelling your pre-order.
For the charge of murder, the judge only gave Ray Liotta and Joe Pesci community service
because they were goodfellas
Why would you never murder on an elevator?
Because it's wrong on so many levels
The convict was charged with first degree murder
I’m not sure why, but there must be a reason behind it.
If a group of dolphins is called a pod and a group of crows is called a murder, what is a group of small children called?
What’s the most effective way to write a murder mystery?
When I found my little son on the floor, I briefly thought a murder took place
Fortunately, it was just a kid napping.
If you commit a 1st degree murder in Canada
is it a 34 degree murder in the US?
I heard someone was planning a murder
I was worried until I found out he was a Crow
Why did i murder the woman who served me a glass of wine?
Because i wanted tequila.
Murders being conducted all over this block
I asked a friend for one reason I shouldn't murder my boss.
His answer was simple. There is no Netflix in prison.
Who decided to call them “murder hornets”
I witnessed a murder today
But as I got closer it flew away
If a group of crows is called a murder of crows...
does that mean 2 or 3 would be an attempted murder?
What do you call appetizers at a murder mystery party?
How did the pasta get away with murder?
The prosecution had gnocci witnesses
What did Margaret Attwood title her latest murder mystery novel, about an Egyptian serial killer who kept drowning people?
What did the train conductor use to murder his ex-wife?
Investigators aren't sure yet, but they discovered he had a loco motive.
I thought I witnessed a murder today
I only counted 2 crows though, so I guess it was really an attempted murder
A fish goes to court for murder
The fish is found “gill”ty
We then asked a artist about the murder:
“I art to be feeling bad” they said
What do you call a pub that’s famous for its murders?
I put original copies of "The Fall of the House of Usher", "The Murders in the Rue Morgue", "The Pit and the Pendulum" and "The Tell-Tale Heart" on credit hoping to pay them off slowly. Unfortunately, I couldn't make all payments...
A serial killer murders people by suffocating them with pig intestines
His media name is Wurst Case Scenario
Within minutes, the detectives figured out what the murder weapon was.
Mona Lisa was once accused of murder....
Turns out, she was framed.
Within minutes, the detectives knew what the murder weapon was.
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