I haven’t got mush-room in my stomach.
They said he'll be given a tough sentence.
There wasn't mush-room to grow there.
“I couldn’t get them, there wasn’t ‘mush room’ in the trolley. “
She threw things at me
So my front yard has a lot of weeds and crappy grass I've been trying to get rid of for years. They're mutants, so nothing will kill them. This year, one of the decorative rocks has turned out to be covered by a giant shroom as well. This thing is enormous. It has about a hundred different canopies, but as far as I can tell it's all one organism.
So I was talking with her about things I might be able to use to get rid of all this stuff, shroom included, and after she suggested a mixture of various household products I asked if it would work on fungus as well. She said it was worth a shot and asked why I wanted to know.
I replied, "Because that thing's just taking up way too mush room."
I was over it in a few seconds, but she's been randomly cracking up for days now. Send help.
They told me they dodnt have mush room for a fun-guy
Because despite their houses' appearance, they don't have mush room
Because they’re fun guys
I said it mush be Neigh-fever
Today was the first day of his class, Special Topics in Poetry. We walk in and there is a guest with some ceramic art. We thought we were gonna write poems about it or some shit, but then the professor says, "Welcome to special topics in pottery."
The whole class is like wat...?
Then the guest lady starts showing a powerpoint of some of her work and then we literally spent the whole class mushing clay and making bowls and shit.
To make things even dadder, he chuckled "poetry pottery heh heh heh" like we didn't get the joke and he had to explain it to us.
Son: “what kind of bear never gets hot?” ... Son: “-a kool..alla “
Daughter: “what do you call a witch you’ve never met?” ... Daughter: “hermione stranger”
Wife: “what do you call a squishy collection of domiciles?” ... Wife: “mush room”
Daughter: “what do you call a Canadian cow?” ... Daughter: “moooooose”
Me: “what beverage do you get when you remove a baby cow from its Mom?” ... Me: “decalf”
I also submitted my joke about the earthquake, like a letter gone international (it’s in another post) or a wayward string gone rogue (in another thread)
I have the best family.
There is so mush room
A Mush-Room.
I've just finished my final paper on Starbucks, Diversity, and Excellence Theory. My professor loves witty titles, but my brain is mush. Suggestions? I can't espresso how much it will help me. Thanks a latte.
Thanks everyone! I loved all of your responses. I titled my paper Brewing Effective Public Relations: Excellence in Diversity at Starbucks.
I ordered pizza from dominos. All I wanted on mine was BBQ sauce and meatballs. When I opened the box, there was mushrooms on it!
I turned to the wife and told her; 'All I wanted was BBQ sauce and meatballs, there wasn't Mush-room for error'.
There isn't mush-room
Apparently, Alaskan racing dogs perform optimally when they consume non-meat products mid-run; needless to say, this has caused a great change in tactics. A lot of it is untested, but a few dogs are going through trials to see how various types of fungi impact their speeds. The training facility was just built; they call it the "mush room."
The other night, my wife made a fantastic peach pie. It was the best one she has been ever made (she even put my initials in it with a heart around it). As she was showing off her handiwork, the pie slipped out of the pan and splattered everywhere. The wife started crying, the kids started complaining. My 23 year old nephew walks into the room and looks at the ensuing chaos. He grabs a handful of the mush, eats it, and says to my wife, "I think the pie turned out just peachy."
The other day I made lasagna for my family. Half of us love mushrooms while the other half hates them, so I usually make two.
Me (pointing to the individual ones): "That one has mushrooms and that one doesn't"
My dad got a sad look on his face when looking at the one w/o mushrooms and said, "Awh, this is terrible. I can't get the spatula in."
Me: "Why not?"
Dad: "There's not mush room in there"
We left without buying anything. Later at dinner: Friend to Bride: "Do you want to go over any dress in particular so they don't all mush together? Kind of a like a debrief?" Me: "Yeah, you don't want to get post-traumatic dress disorder!"
Groans.
How many mushrooms can you fit in a mushroom?
A lot because there's so mush-room!
