Tubers, one stone.
Called the dish, Mea Pulpa.
I told her yeah, I watch it Alda time!
Because they make nice gray-V's.
I guess you could say I’ll just be getting sMASHED from now on.
Anyone can mash potatoes.
I replied I had never thought about it before, but I suppose I’ll take the right side.
Cashier: “sir, I meant mashed potatoes, corn, or beans.”
Me: I just looked next to the mash potatoes and there it was!
Source: tedthestoner2.0.
He falafel.
And I always tell them that I'm not choosing sides.
With not a lot of skin, just a little.
Bride: How come you never help with the dinner
Frankenstein: I did
Bride: How?
Frankenstein: I did the mash...
Bride: Don't you dare
"Get off my mother's grave, NOW!"
...he was forced to take out a restraining order.
I falafel.
It's very unapeeling.
A hummusexual
When he was put to death, his captors ground him up and baked him in the oven covered in gravy and mashed potatoes.
When questioned as to why such a cruel and unusual punishment was administered, they stated that this was the only way to correctly execute a shepherd spy.
Especially next to a pile of mashed potatoes.
So while we were peeling the potatoes, I dropped some of the skin onto the floor. So instead of picking it up, I stick it onto her leg. She then says "Am I appealing????"
I am so proud
If it's two monsters, it's a monster mash.
Otherwise, it's a graveyard smash.
"Make sure to put some in your pocket for later!!"
So lame and it happens EVERY TIME.
Monster mash
The potato asked the yam, "Wanna be my spudy?"
To which he replied, "We're a perfect mash, I already yam."
Johnny: She'll mash them.
I came home for a weekend and my mother was catching me up on some current events in the family.
Her: Oh yeah, your cousin has enlisted in the Navy and he's going to training pretty soon.
Me: Wow, how does the family feel about that?
Her: What do you mean?
Me: Well, are they... pause... All aboard with the idea?
both can't contain laughter
Everyone in my family is witty and we all love dad jokes so we always have a good time around the dinner table.
Super Mash Bros.
“They Mash!” “Yes son! They do the monster mash”
They stepped off the curb and a speeding car came around the corner and ran one of them over. The uninjured potato called 911 and helped his injured friend as best he was able. The injured potato was taken to emergency at the hospital and rushed into surgery. After a long and agonizing wait, the doctor finally appeared. "I have good news, and I have bad news," he told the uninjured potato, "The good news is that your friend is going to pull through." "The bad news... is that he's going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life"
"Mashed potatoes, meatballs. Balls, meet mashed potatoes."
MASHING!
The Muenster mash.
Having dinner with fiancé and parents, sausages, mash, vegetables. Delicious.
Fiancé sits down with her dinner, my Dad asks her why she doesn't have broccoli?
Her: "I can't eat it with irritable bowel"
Me: "you should eat it with carrots like the rest of us"
Uncle and Dad laughed, everyone else stopped forks halfway to mouths.
Spare ribs!
Courtesy of a giggling 4 y/o
Anyone can mash potatoes...
Anyone can mash potatoes
