A meat-loving king has a contest to find the next royal chef. He invites 3 renowned chefs from all over the kingdom to serve him and the favorite will become the new royal chef!
The first chef serves the king an enormous rack of ribs. "Very impressive," said the king.
The second chef serves a huge steak, cooked to perfection. "So satisfying," said the king.
The third chef gives the king a plate with small rocks on a bed of shredded cabbage. "What the hell is this," the king asks.
The third chef says, "These rocks fell from the sky into my back yard. Indeed, ribs and steak are very meaty, but asteroids are meteor!"
They’re just such lightwooded jokes but I understand that it doesn’t teaks everyone’s fancy. I’m running out of tree puns so I might have to branch off to other puns or spruce up my current ones
Guac Guac
Me: "Hey dad, hypothetically, if the world suddenly ran out of beer, what would you do?"
Dad: "I'd probably swap to pandas."
Me: "Is ... is that like a type of cider?"
Dad: "No, it's a black and white animal."
Me: "Dad? There aren't any pandas in New Zealand?"
Dad: "Well, there's no bears either."
Reptile
Sal.
When UB40.
He became an extractor fan.
After a day's job a sniper comes home to his wife.
Sniper: I missed you baby
She said she ain't no Halbach girl.
Breaking into hives
Guns N' Moses
Thanks in advance!
I said, “No, but a pen is.”
But if you could only see the way they loved me, maybe you would understand.
Aria Speedwagon
Melon-Collie.
(I made this one up.. melon = fruit, collie = dog..)
He was trying to secant.
He didn't get it.
