At the end of the physics lecture, I asked my professor, β€œWhat happened before The Big Bang?”

He said, β€œSorry. There is no Time.”

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2021
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I need help following up with this pun, this is a video about a scientist giving a lecture about fire, I can’t think of any more other than pun-ch line
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Huiplayshd1
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
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The professor had used the entire blackboard for the lecture

The blackboard is now chalk-full of information

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gssn-nospace
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2020
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A student is arrested and brought to court for carrying a weapon to his morning lecture

Judge: Why did you bring a taser to your lecture?

Defendent: Well you see sir, I have a hard time getting up in the morning. But I’m not a big fan of soft drinks or coffee, so I thought the next best thing was to give me a good shock.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pumped_Pipe
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2020
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What excuse did the student use to get away with skipping their zoom lecture?

"My dog ate my computer."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anti1447
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2020
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Why do my university lecture theatres have all this blank artwork on the walls?

Link.

It's baffling.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ktisis
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2020
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What do talks, lectures and jokes on Reddit all have in common?

They are all free speech!

https://www.battleforthenet.com/

Stop the FCC from removing net neutrality!

πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/caleb7m
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2017
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My teacher is giving a lecture on the mechanisms of drilling

So far, I find it very boring

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gssn-nospace
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2019
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Why was the duck kicked out of his psychology lecture.

He kept calling the professor a quack.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/StormtrooperMJS
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2020
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We were having a biology lecture about Pavlov's dog

We laughed and we laughed then the bell rang and we all went to the cafeteria

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pabloescobar9000
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
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I forgot to prepare for my lecture today.

I was speechless.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/xhenryxx
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2019
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How do mathematicians lecture their children?

If I’ve told you n times, I’ve told you n+1 times!

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2019
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That time I beat my dad at his own game. In the middle of a heated lecture about not joining my friends' shenanigans, dad said, "Two wrongs don't make a right."

"Two Wrights do make an airplane."

"I'm proud of you. You're still grounded though."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JustJosh724
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2018
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What do you call someone who learns to draw from online lectures?

A Khan artist.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ryzensai
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2019
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A doctor, who was just newly a dad, decided to give a medical school lecture on the human reproductive system and what he learned throughout his partner's pregnancy. When a student asked what the correct pronunciation of ovaries is, he shrugged and said:

Oh, varies.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/noahep22
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2019
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I recently gave a lecture instructing people how to give directions by violently thrusting their arm towards the intended destination.

It was a PowerPoint presentation.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/procrastiprov
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2018
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When I was little, we went to an outdoor lecture featuring the original cast of Star Trek. I was especially excited to see Bones. Unfortunately, we were seated toward the side of the amphitheater, where huge oaks had been planted to frame the stage.

As a result, I couldn't see DeForest through the trees

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πŸ‘€︎ u/confibulator
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2018
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In college, I always fell asleep during my β€œIntro to Marxism” lectures.

I found it hard to achieve class consciousness.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2018
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In lecture this morning my professor...

My professor was talking about Barbara McClintocks work on corn kernel genetics. He stops all the sudden and says "her work really is not all that a-mazeing." He then proceed to look around to see if we laughed, Which almost no one did, cleared his throat and went back to lecturing.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ipittydafoo
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2013
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I attended a psychology lecture by a famous professor today.

It was mental.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SirHolyCow
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2017
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Listening to an accounting lecture when the professor drops some dad puns...

>Do you know where the smartest and most reasonable people work? > At the US mint, because all they do is make cents!

I thought it was over and then two minutes further into the lecture.... >Do you know where else really smart and reasonable people work? > At a perfume factory! All they do is make scents!

Now I am just sitting here posting this and trying to think of more puns...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dmack1228
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2013
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This is what happens when a lecture goes a little too long... imgur.com/HdoHf
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kellygrl6441
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2012
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What is the worst animal to deliver a lecture?

A boar!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/eric67
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2016
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One of my classmates dadjoked a whole lecture hall today

We are in medical pharmacology right now and are starting a series of lectures on chemotherapies. My professor begins the lecture by saying "Who's ready to learn about cancer drugs?!"

This guy gets on the mic, and says, "I'm more of a Libra drug kind of guy."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arkaega
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2015
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What so you call it when a boring chemistry teacher starts a lecture?

Getting your boron.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DededEch
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2015
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In my Neuroanatomy lecture today. Professor: "Are you familiar with the nucleus ambiguus?"

My loud response: "It's ambiguous!"

crickets

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HammerLite75
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2015
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Teacher mentioned specialist who would massage one's aura in a lecture on holistic medicine...

..."I could really go for an aural massage right now" I said.

I didn't realize I'd spoken aloud until I felt everyone silently staring at me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/djtossaway
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2017
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Chem professor dropped this on our lecture...

See how the basic unit is a photon? It has the same '-on' ending as other basic units - like electron, neutron, proton. Now what's the basic unit of sociology?

...

...

...

A pers-on.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/486217935
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2014
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My professor brought up costumes at lecture.

Prof - "Its good that ya'll got so excited for Halloween, but this row (indicates with hand) needs to take off the masks because its too scary for me to teach!"

No one was wearing a mask.

The prof is a grandpa so his dad jokes are squared.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GrenadeStankFace
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2013
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Engineering Professor (who has kids) got our entire lecture

Prof: "What's a hydraulic ram used for?" "Its where you get steel wool!" Lecture students: groans/laughs

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/golfman246
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2015
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At the end of the physics lecture, I asked my professor, β€œWhat happened before The Big Bang?”

He said, β€œSorry. No Time.”

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
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At the end of the physics lecture, I asked my professor, β€œWhat exactly happened before The Big Bang?”

He said, β€œSorry. No time.”

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2019
🚨︎ report
At the end of the physics lecture, I asked my professor, β€œWhat happened before The Big Bang?”

He said, β€œSorry. No time.”

πŸ‘︎ 383
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2018
🚨︎ report
When the physics lecture ended, I asked my professor, β€œWhat happened before The Big Bang?”

He said, β€œSorry. No time.”

πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2019
🚨︎ report
After the lecture was over, I asked my physics professor, β€œWhat happened before The Big Bang?”

He said, β€œSorry. No time.”

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2019
🚨︎ report
At the end of the physics lecture, I asked my professor, β€œWhat happened before The Big Bang?”

He said, β€œSorry. No time.”

πŸ‘︎ 90
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2019
🚨︎ report

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