I never understood why this guy hosts so many tournaments.
The radio host sailed to the same part of the ocean each year
Mike Tyson is going to be the host of a reboot of Pimp my ride.
It will be called Cus-tom auto.
I went to a costume party dressed as a harp. The host said my costume was too small to be a harp.
I replied, "Are you calling me a lyre?"
What do you call an Incarcerated late night TV show host?
how do you host a party in outer space?
I wonder if the host of Jeopardy! absorbed all the trivia he used as answers... he woulda been mighty intelligent...
It would have made him a smart Alec.
It would be impossible to host a professional hide n seek tournament
Since good players are hard to find
Warning: when you host a lobster race, all shell can break loose
I was watching an Australian show and the audience applauded when the host made a lemon meringue.
I was confused because I thought Australians usually boo meringue.
I was all ready to host a limbo contest, but then I found out that someone stole my special limbo bar.
I mean, how low can you go?
They’re demoting me from food server to host starting Monday.
I asked my friend if he would rather be hit in the genitals really hard, driven over a cliff and smacked in the face by a lesbian OR watch his favourite late night host. “That’s easy”, he replied...
I went to a dinner party yesterday. The hosts are chefs and made all kinds of food, buffet style. I arrived early had some hors d'oeuvres. Then I realized I was thirsty, and I wanted to try the mixed juice drink. At this point everyone else was getting food, so I walked right up and got a cup...
I didn't think I'd like being the host of a parasite...
But it's really grown on me.
Here's the latest episode of a competitive pun gameshow that I host, 'Punnit'. Where 3 contestants deliver their best pre-written pun to categories such as Board Games & Kitchen Utensils, Pokemon & Takeaway Dishes + more.
youtube.com/watch?v=sjQg5…
At dinner yesterday, the host asked if we were hungry
I said no we are American
What's the name of the space bounty hunter who used to host Deal or No Deal?
I'm Going to Host a Boat Race
The winner will get pasta. It will be called the Penne Regatta
Who's the cleanest radio host?
One of the hosts of the View invited me to her home and we sat in her den. She then offered a pillow...
TIL the host of Dirty Jobs is now a college proffesor who teaches students about money management and how spending affects the world around them.
The course is called Mike Rowe Economics.
What does the radio host say to their guitar every night?
Qatar has been announced as the hosts for the Olympics 581 years from now.
It’ll be known as the Qatari 2600
Ladies and gentlemen. New host of meme review.
Company came over and we had nothing in the house, so my wife wanted to put out my gourmet cheeses. I refused but she said I had to be a good host
[need help] I have to host a fake wedding and I wanna fill my sermon with as much puns as possible
I think I'll start with "What is love? Baby don't hurt me", but then I have to say "we're gathered here today, ect.." and finish with "you may now kiss the bride",
It'll last about 1 minute, and I wanna really embarrass them. Any ideas?
Did you hear they are trying to get Barbara Walters to host the New Years Eve ball drop?
We will bring in the New Year with "I am Barbara Walters and this is 2020"
I was watching a documentary about Jesus when the host announced that they are having a commercial break.
"Jesus of Nazareth will return."
Can anyone help me tell which of my coworkers is host to a shape-shifting alien life form?
I wasn't gonna tell the host that I considered wearing a t-shirt covered in poo to his party.
But in the end I decided to come clean.
I heard Toad always hosts the best parties
They say he is a really fungi
Jeff Dunham is going to host the Oscars this year
It’ll be the Acadummy Awards
Matt LeBlanc won't be very good as the new Top Gear host...
because he will always be stuck in second gear!
If /puns were to host a fence building party according to the rules...
(This is more parody/satire than a pun, but I tried to make sure it had puns.)
-
No more than half the people attending can wear trucker hats.
-
The fences must be measured and spaced using meters. It doesn't matter if you're putting them in someone's yard.
-
If you pull up a fence post, you cannot reuse it. In fact, you cannot use recycled posts from other people's yards.
-
Don't keep up with the Jones'. But if you can't avoid this, make sure you give the Jones' the credit due for coming up with it first.
-
You can bring lunch as sort of a potluck affair, but do not bring canned meat products from Hormel.
-
If you bring a fence post, it must look like a fence post. If it might be confused with something else, make sure the box or protective wrapping calls it a fence post.
-
When announcing the event, you are not allowed to make references to punch or people getting in line for punch. Just like Fight Club...
For now, we have no rule about promoting one stock car event over another as you work, or discussing other controversial matters. That won't change as long as you don't abuse this. Please keep your fence posts in good taste and suitable for all audiences. But if you do bring risque fence posts, make sure to cover them with a shroud labeled adult only, and I won't pull them up, provided the other rules are followed.
I'm a karaoke host. Last night I had a singer named, Alexa.
She signed up to sing The Killers. Right before she sang, I said, "Alexa, play The Killers."
I have to host an early morning staff meeting tomorrow, does anyone have any good openers for an early morning meeting to break the ice?
Jamie used to be a blackjack host, but was offered a better deal
Fox News Host Jeanine Pirro Gets Ticket for Speeding at 119 M.P.H. but, fortunately there was no accident.
She was charged with wreckless driving.
My school hosts a volleyball tournament every year. Here are some if my favorite team names
- The Notorious D.I.G.
- The Orval Redenblockers (I probably butchered that spelling)
- The Volley Lamas
- The Gold Diggers
- The Serve-ivers
Wheel of Fortune should host a show in Washington state.
Then I could winna Winnebago in Walla Walla, Washington
[Request] Trying to come up with punny names for a host at a zombie room escape.
He's an assistant to the room's zombie, a neurosurgeon named Dr. Oxy.
How do you host a space party?
How does Mike Rowe (Host of Dirty Jobs) cook most of his meals?
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
