Don't worry, I'm 0K.
-an apple after going on an earthquake simulator.
So I took up belly dancing
I've a duel core processor.
Korean.
An abdominal snowman!
Pic of my new device here - http://i.imgur.com/UwQ8ZUE.jpg
Me: I'll ab-stain, thanks.
Dad: groan Oh, that one was abdominal.
If we got rid of the Earth's core, it would be dismantling to our infrastructure.
It was a cider attack.
because it’s a core-idor!
He was a subdued sub dude.
They worked their core-set
iWood
Soft core porn
but at their core they are seedy as hell.
I know it's been done before, and many a dad before me and many a dad after me will get to experience this, but in these dark times this was a ray of light that pierced me right to the core with joy.
I came home, and my bright and bubbly ballerina 6 year old runs up and says can I have a hug!?
She asks very tentatively because she knows I have been out all day and the routine is for me to grab a shower (COVID) before I let them get all over me.
So I say, not yet I'm dirty.
She says awww... then she turns to walk away, but then spins back around and looks at me dead in the eye and says:
Hi! um...
wait a sec,
um, I know um,
um, wait.... dir...
[Face beams the biggest smile of accomplishment]
Hi Dirty! I'm [daughter]!
I know we have those proud moments when they turn, but man her delivery, the awkwardness, and the sheer pride she beamed out when she realized she just pulled the reverse dad joke on me...
It's not the getting reverse dad'd, it's the joy and pride she had... she could have just graduated college, and that's how big her beaming smile was right then...
It's a memory I am going to keep and it really lit up this dark time.
What’s the core temperature of a tauntaun? “Lukewarm”
I said “war, ore, door”
He was core-wrecked.
Core-ean
It was exactly what I expected.
She said, "that's almost core-rect."
I got repossessed.
...because it was boring.
It is the apple of my eye
"I wonder if quad core or duo core matters much..."
"Well, Apple's have a single core, and they run fine."
*Cue groaning
Spill the thesis
Core-on
Seize the day!
Now they’re spoiled to the alba-core.
I guess he’s into soft core.
Last night I was playing an online game with some of my son's friends, and one randomly texted on the in-game chat: "I just ate an apple. RAW!"
I wrote back, "That's hard core!"
Nobody laughed. At least, that I saw. :(
Edit: Holy moly, it gets mediocre response two days ago when it's posted, then it blows up over the weekend. Thanks for all the upvotes, folks! Love all the other terrible jokes & puns on here!
I've been getting into cornography lately! Do y'all know of any good corn sites? I'm a big fan of hard core schucking, but I like the occasional slow stuff.
all of my friends hate puns to the core, but i love them so so much and i like to annoy them with the really really bad ones, so give me your best reddit and make me proud :D
Core-ean
Core-ean
Core-ean
Core-ean
