Brisket Puns

Old timer

It smoked for 6 hours.

...so now I'm a naan smoker.

Patient: yes.

Doctor: marijuana, cigarettes, cigars, Vapes?

Patient: mostly brisket, and pork.

Guy:"Whats this about?" Bartender:"Well, if you can jump up and slap the meat, you get free drinks for the rest of the night. If you miss, you pay for everyones drinks for the next hour. You wanna do it? Guy:"Nah, the steaks are too high."

Luckily it finally dawned on me.

🤦🏻‍♂️ Got a big 12 pound brisket on the grill today, and several more dad jokes in the chamber. Doin dad stuff.

Mostly brisket and pork.

It's called Risk it for Brisket

but I didn't wanna brisket.

Two answers:

• The steaks were too high.

• He didn't want to brisket.

Let me preface this with some info. Firstly, me and my father are idiots; our jokes can become insensitive if we aren't careful, as we have few filters. My parents live in a tiny town amidst a thousand other tiny towns. One of the tiny towns right beside us (let's call it Townsburg) has a lot of forest and extra land, so towards the end of the summer when it's still hot but the land is starting to dry out, it's rather susceptible to fires. The other day, Townsburg caught fire in a few different places. The town my parents live in (we'll call it Cityville) is the sausage capital of our state. Yep. Sausage capital. Like brisket and such. Our proudest export is meat. Meat is what we are most proud of. I don't live there anymore, thank the universe.

So I went by my parents house on the way home from work one day to check on my retired, sick father, and watch the news with him (something I try to do whenever I can). And what happened next, well, it all just happened so fast...

Me: "Whoa, Townsburg is on fire again. I guess Cityville isn't the barbecue capital anymore, AYO." Dad: "Nope. Looks like they're about to be the barbecued capital." Me: "...we may need to stop hanging out so much."

Patient: yes

Doctor: marijuana, cigarettes, cigars, Vapes?

Patient: mostly brisket, and pork.