Is anyone interested in my religion that worships pinto beans?
We believe they're holy frijoles!
Why did the Scotsman only eat 239 beans?
Because if he had one more heβd be (Scottish accent) two farty.
Ivanka Trump: Whatβs the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea?
Daddy never had a Garbanzo bean on his face.
Pirates of the carib bean
It's bean long since I've heard a classic pun.
What is a bag of beans you can't eat?
Which bean loves women the most?
What is the friendliest bean in the world?
Did you know there are exactly 239 beans in Irish stew?
Any more and it would be two farty...
Did you know every can of Busch's baked beans has exactly 239 beans?
Just one more and it'd be "too farty."
My friend tried to ride his horse from Maine to the Southwestern United States for a type of bean but was hit by an older Ford...
This morning, my wife was grinding coffee beans and suddenly said, βWeβre through.β
It was grounds for divorce.
Coffee beans must have the lowest self-esteem...
Theyβre always getting roasted!
God blessed my beans and meat
It's spirit-chilli ready to eat
What do you get when you eat a peanut butter & baked bean sandwich?
A fart that sticks to the roof of your butt.
Bill, the weatherman: βTodayβs weather forecast will be two beans in a tomato, meat sauce.β
Anchor: Bill, what on earth are you talking about?
Bill: Itβll be a little chili.
What do you call Mexican jumping beans with a cold?
You need exactly 239 beans to make Irish soup because if you add one more it becomes too farty.
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︎ Oct 25 2019
This year for Valentine's day I gave people a can of root beer and a can of refried beans.
Told them to have a rootin' tootin' Valentine's day.
Mr. Lima Bean
π︎ 29
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︎ Nov 17 2019
At the end of the day we're all human beans
And together, we will rice!
People who eat beans everyday,
Have a higher risk of having a fart attack
Whatβs the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea?
Iβve never had a garbanzo bean on my face.
bean.
π︎ 65
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︎ Sep 06 2019
Why do the Irish only put 239 beans in their soup?
Because one more and it'll be too-farty
Tik tok bean o clock
π︎ 13
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︎ Nov 06 2019
At the end of the day, weβre all Human Beans.
And together, we will rice.
Lettuce Pray.
Ramen.
π︎ 12
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︎ Dec 01 2019
Why should you insult your coffee beans before brewing them?
To make sure they are well roasted.
π︎ 18
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︎ Nov 05 2019
Easier than stealing a bean from a beanie baby
π︎ 28
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︎ Sep 27 2019
Bean bag chair
π︎ 10
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︎ Oct 13 2019
Garbanzo bean kidding me
π︎ 24
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︎ Aug 10 2019
So my daughter was eating leftover baked beans for lunch, and she said really likes them...
I told she could be my Beanie Baby!
π︎ 3
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︎ Nov 29 2019
Bean nice
π︎ 4
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︎ Sep 02 2019
Coffee isn't electrically conductive in bean form.
But it is when it's ground.
π︎ 17
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︎ Jun 30 2019
You got Bean boozled!
π︎ 2
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︎ Jul 26 2019
How many beans are in a can?
239, one more and youβd be too farty
Credit: u/theboomerman and where ever he got it from
π︎ 20
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︎ Jul 11 2019
Me making dinner: How much green beans should I make? Two cans?
Or I can try to make parrots instead...
π︎ 4
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︎ Oct 20 2019
BIG BEANS [OC]
π︎ 28
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︎ May 20 2019
I was rubbing a lamp containing fermented soya beans and suddenly a mythical creature popped up and started making sexist remarks against women.
π︎ 6
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︎ Sep 16 2019
What do you call it when you throw lima beans into a river?
π︎ 12
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︎ Aug 20 2019
What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chick pea?
I've never had a garbanzo bean on my face.
π︎ 14
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︎ Aug 18 2019
What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?
Chickpeas are only half awful, garbanzo beans are falafel.
π︎ 3
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︎ Aug 02 2019
What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?
I've never had a garbanzo bean on me before.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jul 01 2019
Why are there only 239 beans in a can?
If thereβs one more, it would be too farty.
π︎ 72
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︎ Feb 16 2019
Coffee Beans are bad parents. Their kids are always grounded.
π︎ 176
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︎ Apr 03 2019
Why are there only 239 beans in a can of beans?
In thick Irish accent
Because if there were one more itβd be too farty
π︎ 10
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︎ Aug 02 2019
Me and the boys out at 3am looking for BEANS
π︎ 2
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︎ Jun 17 2019
If you work for Starbucks, and are caught stealing beans...
It's grounds for dismissal.
π︎ 136
π
︎ Oct 25 2018
I think I put too many baked beans in my eyes
It was a poor decision, in Heinz sight.
π︎ 10
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︎ Jul 17 2019
Cool beans
π︎ 14
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︎ Feb 16 2019
My friend was making some beans in tomato sauce for dinner and she spilled some
then she giggled and said βwe canβt eat those now, theyβve bean on the floorβ
π︎ 23
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︎ Jun 18 2019
Do you know what you call a yellow bean?
π︎ 2
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︎ Aug 11 2019
Whatβs the difference between a chick pea and a garbanzo bean?
I would never pay to have a garbanzo bean on my face
π︎ 4
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︎ Jun 16 2019
π︎ 2
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︎ Apr 27 2019
Did you know there is a limit of 239 beans in a can of beans?
Adding 1 more would make it 2 farty
π︎ 26
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︎ Apr 18 2019
Why are there only 287 beans in a can?
If there were 288, it would be two gross.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Feb 16 2019
Bean
π︎ 16
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︎ Oct 23 2018
My attempt at juggling 3 cans of beans resulted in a messy kitchen,
in Heinz sight, it was a bad idea.
π︎ 31
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︎ Jan 29 2019
Beans, beans theyβre good for your heart,
The more you eat...wait, how did it start?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jun 30 2019
What do Russians say to people who eat too many beans?
π︎ 14
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︎ May 11 2019
I mentioned intense circle jerk Tuesdays and beans earlier
π︎ 11
π
︎ Jan 30 2019
Why does Irish bean soup have 239 beans?
1 more & it'd be 'too farty'
π︎ 11
π
︎ May 13 2019
My friend came over and asked what i was writing and i spilled the beans...
I've got a bean and paper salad now
π︎ 2
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︎ Jun 29 2019
What do you call a vampire that eats lots of beans?
π︎ 3
π
︎ May 31 2019
Two baked beans were travelling around Australia, do you know where they ended up?
π︎ 22
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︎ Jan 23 2019
"I say ole bean, java pen?" "Why yes, I do what Sumatra with yours? "Cool beans mines not too perky."
π︎ 5
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︎ Jan 22 2019
Bean
π︎ 239
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︎ Nov 25 2017
What happened to the coffee bean when he was bad?
π︎ 6
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︎ Apr 08 2019
the bean
π︎ 8
π
︎ Dec 01 2018
What kind of beans are in God's burrito?
Holy Frijoles!
(PS this is original as far as I can tell, so proud yuk yuk)
π︎ 8
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︎ Mar 29 2019
cool beans
π︎ 2
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︎ Jan 13 2019
How does Mr. Bean introduce himself in Spain?
π︎ 9
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︎ Feb 26 2019
My dad and his beans.
π︎ 3k
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︎ Oct 15 2013
What do you call a coffee bean security guard?
π︎ 3
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︎ Apr 08 2019
Do you know why the Irish only put 239 beans in their soup?
Because one more would be too-farty
π︎ 108
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︎ Jun 16 2018
What did one bean dude say to another bean dude?
π︎ 9
π
︎ Feb 19 2019
What do you call beans that are seasoned with marijuana?
π︎ 15
π
︎ Oct 14 2018
What did one bean say to the other bean?
Hold me close, Iβm a little bit chili.
π︎ 2
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︎ Mar 29 2019
What is the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea?
Iβve never payed $100 to have a garbanzo bean on my face.
π︎ 16
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︎ Aug 23 2018
bean a long time
π︎ 4
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︎ Oct 14 2018
What's the difference between a Garbanzo Bean and a Chickpea?
I wouldn't pay $300 to have a Garbanzo Bean on my face
π︎ 5
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︎ Feb 15 2019
I sent my brother navy beans, because he's in the Navy
No. That's the whole joke. I'm just waiting til he receives the package now
π︎ 4
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︎ Oct 03 2018
Lightning never strikes coffee in its bean form.
π︎ 20
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︎ Sep 17 2018
At the end of the day, we are all just human beans.
π︎ 2
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︎ Aug 06 2019
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