and orders everyone a round.
was a mazing
She said try Sarah Topps.
Now she's a small medium at large.
Shame on him for trying to make a quick buck.
I heard he uses a lot of cymbalisms in his works
They thought it was cannon to the story.
JK rolling
At least he died on his own terms.
I said that I didn’t feel tempted to do so et. al
They contacted his next of Ken.
That's a damn good joke. I'm proud of that joke.
Because everyone knows the first rule of writing is “show, don’t tell”
But it's hard to say...
You’ve probably never heard of him.
I lost the case
An authoritative write winged government.
He was left with only a semicolon.
They put him in the writers block. Couldn’t get past his first sentence.
Toast-oyevsky!
“Well son” I replied “it’s a long story”
Because she's Rowling on the floor with laughter
His favorite author is Fido-r Dogs-toy-evsky.
Guess the authorities thought I was a cereal killer
He's mostly known for his polyp fiction.
"Mark my words"
Authoritis!
So, she walks over and takes a seat next to him on the bench, turns to him and says, "Sorry to bother you. I know this may be a little forward but I would love to grab coffee with you some time."
Flattered, the man responds, "Sure... but what makes you so certain you and I would get along so well?"
"Well..." the woman says. "A couple things, actually. I noticed you were wearing an Iron Maiden t-shirt. Iron Maiden are my favorite band of all time. When they went on their reunion tour in 1999, my parents took me to see them in Cleveland. I was 12 years old and it was the first concert I ever went to. I absolutely love Iron Maiden."
The man can't believe it.
"I saw them play Cleveland in '99! First concert I ever went to on my own. My best friend Jimmy Spitz and I told our parents we were sleeping at each others' houses, snuck out, took a bus into the city and saw them play at the Plain Dealer Pavillion!"
Naturally, they're both shocked.
"If that isn't weird enough..." says the woman. "I noticed you're reading Mark Twain. I was a communications major in university and I actually wrote my thesis on Mark Twain and how he used satire as a lens to comment on current events of the time, comparing him to satirical news sources of today. He's my favorite author."
Now the man is really taken aback, "Get out of here! I was an English major in university! I specialized in 19th century American literature and this is like my fourth or fifth time reading Tom Sawyer, I absolutely love Mark Twain."
They both can't believe it...this has got to be a match made in heaven.
"Ok..." the woman says. "Well, buckle up because here's the icing on the cake. I noticed you're eating a prune. Prunes are my absolute favorite fruit. When I was a kid, my grandfather lived on a farm. He had an orchard that mainly grew apples and some lemons, but he knew how much my sister and I loved prunes so he kept a couple of plum trees. Every year at the end of the summer, we'd go up and harvest the plums with him. He'd dry them and by the time we'd go back to his place for Thanksgiving he'd always have those prunes saved just for us. They're my favorite fruit! I love prunes, you're eating a prune, this has got to be fate. What do you say?"
The man puts down his fruit and responds,
"It's a date!"
After reading it, the authorities all agreed that it was a killer joke.
Walking
JK
Rolling
sorry if it’s a repost my cousin told me it like 2 months ago
Autobiography
They don’t like Dick’s
So I drove down the manualbahn instead.
...apparently he had been trying to give it away for almost 20 years, but nobody would return his emails.
Police are working tirelessly to catch him
She said, “Try Sarah Topps”
