Why was the writer kicked off of the movie set?
Why Did The Cook Want to Become a Writer?
Because he wanted to flip the script!
Did you hear about the unreadable writer with a colostomy bag?
Turns out he only had a semicolon.
How many Mystery-genre writers does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to screw it almost all the way in and the other to give it a surprising twist at the end.
I got fired from my job as a sports writer, they said all my articles were too short
I guess a pitcher is worth a thousand words.
Why did the author suffer writers block after rectal surgery?
He was left with only a semicolon.
My friend is a ghost writer.
He is currently working on his boo-ography.
I quit my job today as a sign writer.
I could see the writing was on the wall.
What do you call a writer who doesn't follow the rules of sentence structure?
As an aspiring writer, I always make sure to proofread carefully
Otherwise, I might accidentally some words out
They should just have been paperback writers.
Why was the writer comfortable in the army?
He was familiar with the magazines.
Have you heard about the mystery writer who was a Chubby Checker Fan?
All of his stories had Twist endings.
Today I learned: The writer Stephen King has a son named Joe.
I’m not joking, but he is.
VP Joe Biden announced he has hired a female amputee speech writer.
He said she would be really good at stump speeches.
This writer had a field day
The headline writer for this article had waited years for this moment. Though it is rumoured his final idea came to him on the tube...
bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england…
My son is a very persistent writer.
I have an author you can't refuse.
What can you hear whenever the writer of Futurama tells a dad joke?
Why do writers have to tell the truth?
Because if not, they would be called wrongers.
An essay had a picture of a young sheep. Nowhere did the writer cite where he got it from.
Where's the lamb source!?
My writer buddy went to buy a new boat...
A condition that every writer fears
What do i have in common with movie script writers
99.9% of the things i try to do gets rejected by everyone.
A writer on The Good Place submitted the following list of restaurant name puns with the script for her episode. It includes gems like "Squab Goals" and "Pie Another Day."
twitter.com/meganamram/st…
Why did the writer go into a restricted area?
Because she’s an authorized person
Being a writer is enjoyable...
But the job of editor is more rewording.
The writer of Harry Potter tripped and fell...
She was J.K. Rowling on the Floor
Why do writers wait for movie end-credits?
I went to high school with a Buzzfeed writer, and I remember him offering me $20 to hang out with him and his friends.
Turns out it was Clique bait.
I was going through my twitter account, and remembered I write puns when I have writer’s block. Hopefully this counts.
An ancient Greek playwright was suffering writer’s block. Kept scribbling down lines and then tearing up the pages.
Picking up the torn pages, his friend asked, “Why Euripides?”
One of CNN's headline writers is obviously a dad
I sea what you did there!
http://i.imgur.com/tEp5yIh.png
What did Jesus say to the gospel writer?
What do you call a second-rate writer?
My dad gave me some advice on writer's block.
"Forcing creative work is like forcing a fart...it will probably come out much worse than you had hoped."
What's a writer's favorite thing to watch on TV?
A writer tells his friend, "I once got fifty dollars a word!"
"I talked back to the judge!"
What do you call a letter that seems to be a submissive writer?
“A” likened sub-scribe
please kill me
How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to change the bulb and another to give it an unexpected twist at the end.
How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. One to screw it almost all the way in and another to give it a surprising twist at the end.
How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to screw it in most of the way and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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