He said, "Well this is a rest home."
My wife and I brought our new daughter to meet my grandmother who lives in a nursing home in another state. This nursing home has a cat and two dogs that also reside there. I only saw one of the dogs, but my grandmother told me that the other one has no tail. I asked "why not?" she said "It's mother bit the tail off." - I said "What a bitch!" It took a moment, then she said. "She IS a bitch." - We both laughed.
She's 92 now. We have no idea where she is.
In America you can buy a square foot of bricks for around $8.50. There are 7 bricks in a square foot, meaning you are buying each brick for about a $1.21. Today one dollar is 0.75 pounds, so $1.21 is about 0.92 pounds, meaning for a full pound you can buy 1.087 bricks for about a pound. Each brick weighs 5 pounds, which means 1.087 bricks weighs 5.435 pounds. Now on the other hand you many buy 48 feathers for one dollar in America , considering that one dollar is 0.75 ponds, you could buy 64 feathers. with one pound. Each feather weighs around 0.0003 ounces, which multiplied by 64 is 0.0192 ounces , which is 0.0012 pounds. 5.435> 0.0012. There you have it a pound of bricks weighs more than a pound if feathers .
DAD: Would you like to be the sun in my life?
MOM: Awww... Yes!!!
DAD: Good then stay 92.96 million miles away from me
90+91+92+93+94+95+96+97+98+99 =945 !!!!! Ba dum tss!!!
He had what I thought was an Asüna Sunfire at some point and I was sure it came out in '93, but he suddenly goes, no, I got this one in '92.
The Asun...as possible.
... yeah it was pretty awkward getting my head down in that trough.
Told to me by my 92 year-old neighbor/WW2 Navy veteran
I was buying cake and candles for my wife's 29th birthday yesterday. The clerk scanned the cake and the "2" and "9" candles and said, "Oh, someone's having a birthday, huh?"
"Yup, it's my wife's birthday today," I replied. "It's amazing, really. She's already 92, yet she doesn't look a day over 90."
Some man approached my dad and asked him what year he graduated looking at his class ring. My dad tells him class of '92 and he asked how that was possible because my father looks pretty old. He informs him it was for his PhD and that his kids like to call him a doctor that doesn't help anybody. The stranger responds, well my kids call me a doctor that just sits on a stool and passes gas. We were both obviously confused until he let us know he was an anesthesiologist.
90 + 91 + 92 + 93 + 94 + 95 + 96 + 97 + 98 + 99 = 945
90+91+92+93+94+95+96+97+98+99=945
90+91+92+93+94+95+96+97+98+99=945
90+91+92+93+94+95+96+97+98+99 = 945
