After the events of Avengers: Endgame, Professor Hulk opened a custom woodworking business

It was called Bruce Banisters

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👤︎ u/AllanCD
📅︎ Jun 18 2020
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I failed shop because I couldn't handle the bow saw used to cut intricate external shapes and interior cut-outs in woodworking

I had trouble coping.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Feb 14 2020
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My friend is always bragging about his woodworking tool like an axe but with the cutting edge perpendicular to the handle rather than parallel.

What an adze!

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Mar 18 2020
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What's the best way to learn woodworking?

Wittle by wittle

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👤︎ u/irbinator
📅︎ Sep 19 2019
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r/woodworking? Um yeah I sure hope it does. reddit.com/r/woodworking/…
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👤︎ u/melonwheel
📅︎ Oct 04 2019
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I picked up a book on woodworking.

Just need to carve out some time to read it.

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👤︎ u/tigger3370
📅︎ Jul 30 2019
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My 70 year old Dad, is SO proud of his "bird house" (r/woodworking crosspost)

I was told /r/dadjokes would like this.

My dad says it's the biggest birdhouse in the world. http://imgur.com/lzKJ3w4

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👤︎ u/clineco
📅︎ Apr 09 2014
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I just lost my virginity today in woodworking class.

Probably the only time i will get nailed (through the leather soul and foot).

P.S: i am alright, no infection.

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👤︎ u/blackcat74
📅︎ May 04 2017
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A man registered for a woodworking class...

A man registered for a woodworking class at his local college. At the end of orientation day, he went up to his professor and nervously enquired whether they would be learning how to make chairs.

"But of course," exclaimed the instructor. "Why?"

"Oh well you see," the man exhaled, visibly relieved "I suffer from IBS and my doctor requested a stool sample."

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👤︎ u/Thewilltosucceed
📅︎ Feb 17 2017
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Dad joked my dad about woodworking.

My mom was having trouble cutting some wood. She said it was hard to keep it stable. My dad, "Grab a couple of horses" (like sawhorses), and I immediately replied, "Wouldn't that make it more unstable?"

It took him a minute. Then he told me I had to leave.

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👤︎ u/jz88k
📅︎ Mar 22 2014
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Me and my roommate go to school for woodworking and are looking forward to the lathe next semester.

I told him "I can't wait to start learning how to turn:, I then turned 90° to my left and exclaimed "holy crap I'm getting the hang of it already"

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👤︎ u/Mackhasarack
📅︎ Dec 07 2014
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This r/woodworking thread is a series of great dad jokes.
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👤︎ u/grobota
📅︎ Jan 03 2015
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/r/woodworking channels their dad side

http://www.reddit.com/r/woodworking/comments/2idwk0/my_wife_asked_me_to_make_a_key_ring_that_stopped/cl1itf6

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👤︎ u/MDDDIY
📅︎ Oct 06 2014
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Given to my friend who is a woodworker
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👤︎ u/mango_chair
📅︎ Feb 14 2021
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A master woodworker needed transportation, so he built a motorcycle out of the best lumber in the workshop.

It wooden start

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👤︎ u/ToastyZ71
📅︎ Feb 22 2021
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I tried to make a carpentry pun that woodwork

But nobody saw it!

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👤︎ u/Frindwamp
📅︎ Jan 09 2021
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How does a British woodworker get around?

A cab innit

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👤︎ u/lilAKoof
📅︎ Aug 25 2020
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Why should you use your mouth to paint woodwork?

Lips gloss

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👤︎ u/maccer20
📅︎ Apr 22 2020
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Im looking for a joke about carpentry.

Does anyone know one that woodwork?

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👤︎ u/Thecobs
📅︎ Feb 16 2021
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I noticed that 80% of woodworkers have bad backs from their trade.

So I’m starting a lumbar support group.

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👤︎ u/nftpc
📅︎ Jan 25 2020
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What do you call a fish who makes his living as a woodworker?

A Carp-enter

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👤︎ u/Kerlandays
📅︎ Aug 08 2019
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I'm learning woodwork, but it's taking a long time.

I wish it was a whittle faster.

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👤︎ u/SweetShakes
📅︎ Dec 28 2017
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I asked a woodworker if he could make some wider chairs for me right now...

but he told me to sit tight.

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👤︎ u/TommehBoi
📅︎ Oct 03 2018
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What does a vain woodworker with a lisp say to the mirror each morning?

I am in love with my shelf.

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👤︎ u/OneEyeGrommsh
📅︎ Mar 28 2019
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I thought of a carpentry joke.

I just wasn’t sure if it woodwork.

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👤︎ u/s_tormbringr
📅︎ Aug 15 2020
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There was a lumberjack who moonlighted as a serial killer. He used wood chippers to dispose of the bodies, which is why he was so prolific.

Every once in a while, these guys come out of the woodwork.

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👤︎ u/sarcasticpremed
📅︎ Jan 04 2021
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I see more and more woodworkers making things out of poplar.

It's becoming quite...

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👤︎ u/agoatforavillage
📅︎ Dec 07 2017
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How do you know your turtle is dead?

Rigortortoise sets in

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📅︎ Jul 06 2020
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Wood working dad jokes?

Just wondering if anyone has some good woodworking related dad jokes?

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👤︎ u/ASmaller
📅︎ Oct 16 2018
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One of the first jokes I ever wrote. Met with many a groan.

A doctor walks into a woodworking shop. He finds the woodworker, asks him "Do you make all these yourself?" The woodworker says yes, he does. The doctor continues, "Because I'm looking for some backless chairs for my office and I don't see any on the floor. I'm not ready to buy yet, so I'm going to need a stool sample."

GET IT?

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👤︎ u/ambergillmore
📅︎ Jun 13 2015
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Doing a little hand carving
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👤︎ u/MEatRHIT
📅︎ Aug 10 2015
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"Dad, my friend and I have nothing to do"

Dad stops woodworking and says "Okay, then look at this", and holds up a saw in the air. "Do you see it?" he says.

The two kids were puzzled, but affirmed it.

"Good," the dad said, "now you two have a see-saw."

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👤︎ u/thefizzynator
📅︎ Mar 25 2016
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So confusing when my wife asks me to make the bed...

We have a perfectly good one sitting right in the bedroom already, and I am terrible at Woodworking.

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👤︎ u/Wraeth_205
📅︎ Apr 24 2017
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Displaying small objects in DT class

Back when I were a young whippersnapper, we had a woodworking project to create something that would let us display a small object.

After a few minutes of the teacher asking us what we would display, and a large number of frankly stupid responses, he told us to stop shouting out. Then someone suggested they display some scissors. He asked "Why would you want to display some scissors?!"

Without skipping a beat I yelled out "To display the cutting edge of technology!"

I can still see him staring at me now!

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👤︎ u/LynchGFX
📅︎ May 27 2015
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Libraries

My dad and I were talking about info he needed for some woodworking project he was doing. This was in the late 90's and specific info like that still wasn't always on the internet.

"Maybe I'll just rent a book from the library."

"Dad, you don't rent books from the library, you borrow them."

"Huh... Well, maybe I'll start my own library where you rent books instead. It'd be a novel idea."

That was 15 years ago now, and I still cringe (and then smirk) when I think of it.

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👤︎ u/1-900-OKFACE
📅︎ Feb 22 2014
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I was gonna do a carpentry joke..

But I didn't know if it woodwork

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👤︎ u/felinebarbecue
📅︎ Jan 03 2020
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