Windscreen Puns

A list of puns related to "Windscreen"

What snakes keep the windscreen clean?

Vipers

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👤︎ u/Tankerman05
📅︎ Nov 25 2019
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Its bloody cold today just had to use my Company’s staff discount card to scrape the ice off my windscreen.

Still only managed to get 10% off....

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👤︎ u/IAMBiSH
📅︎ Jan 31 2019
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What is everyone using to scrape ice off their windscreen?

This morning, I used a discount card from my wallet, but it was no good. I only got 20% off.

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👤︎ u/BenAdam321
📅︎ Feb 01 2019
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If your car windscreen is frozen over on these cold winter mornings

Pouring boiling water over it is a cracking idea.

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👤︎ u/Sparko_Marco
📅︎ Feb 02 2019
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Whats the last thing to go through a flies mind when it hits a car windscreen?

It's ass

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👤︎ u/The-Explodey
📅︎ Jun 10 2016
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I saw a guy this morning wearing a black cloak and scraping the frost off his windscreen with a Scythe...

I was going to offer a hand but my wife told me it's not a good idea to de-ice with death

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👤︎ u/26326312
📅︎ Oct 31 2017
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What's the last thing a fly sees, when it hits your windscreen?

It's Arse..

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👤︎ u/jaslam88
📅︎ Sep 06 2013
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What do you get when you hit a duck on the freeway?

A quack in the windscreen.

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👤︎ u/potatostomach
📅︎ Dec 26 2020
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Someone complimented me on my driving the other day.

Left a note on the windscreen; Parking Fine!

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👤︎ u/tiger7971
📅︎ Oct 12 2020
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Somebody complimented me on my driving today.

They left a little note on the windscreen, it said “Parking Fine”. So that was nice.

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👤︎ u/CdotBigz
📅︎ Oct 22 2018
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I got complented on my driving today.

Somebody left a little note on my windscreen. It read 'parking fine'.

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👤︎ u/December_Soul
📅︎ Mar 29 2019
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A stranger got me while asking for directions.

I'm driving around looking for a friend's house who's just moved in and my phone's dead so I can't look it up.

I see a guy so I stop to ask him, "What's the best way to get to Seymour Road?"

"Get a bigger windscreen."

I laughed against my will.

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👤︎ u/ryanocerous123
📅︎ May 09 2015
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What was the last thing that went through his mind?

Driving in car and bug hits windscreen Dad: What was the last thing that went through his mind? Pause Dad: His arse! Cackles

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👤︎ u/Androgynousy
📅︎ Nov 17 2014
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