Teenie weenie
πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Leboy2Point0
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
🚨︎ report
A woman actually wrote the song: "Itsy-Bitsy, Teenie-Weenie, Yellow Polka-Dot Bikini."

A man would have written: "Itsy-Bitsy, GIANT CRANK, Yellow Polka-Dot Bikini."

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PotBuzz
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the cowboy get a weenie dog?

He wanted to getta long little dogy

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dahletor
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2018
🚨︎ report
What's smaller than a teeny weenie flea?

A flea's teeny weenie.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/danilaroo
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2015
🚨︎ report
The urge to sing β€œThe Lion Sleeps Tonight” is always just a whim away...

A whim away, a whim away, a whim away

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KoalaTeaNip
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2021
🚨︎ report
Why can't ghosts have children?

they have Hallow-weenies!

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mastr9ball
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Why can’t witches get pregnant?

Because their husbands have β€œhallo weenies”. Lol happy holidays y’all.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Lil_Username_
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
🚨︎ report
Why'd the cowboy adopt a daschund?

To get a long little doggie.

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/OhioTry
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the artist that has been drawing very small, colorful noodles?

He drew an itsy, bitsy, teeny-weeny, yellow, polka dot linguini

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DanGlerrBOY89
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Why couldn’t Mr. and Mrs. Witch have babies?

Mr. Witch had a hollow weenie.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ecmm
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2019
🚨︎ report
The card I got from my father is shaped like a hot dog

"Hot dog, it's your birthday! Let's be Frank, you're probably planning to party your buns off, so go ahead - don't be a weenie! Relish every moment of your celebration."

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/undeadpenguins
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Why cant ghosts have kids

Because they have Hollow Weenies

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Subliminal_Image
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2019
🚨︎ report
That time of year again

Why don't ghosts have babies?

Because they have Hollow weenies!

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/michaelkane911
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2019
🚨︎ report
What you call a hotdog suit hanging in the closet in October?

A hollow weenie costume.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mailfromphoenix
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2019
🚨︎ report
What happened to the man with two wooden legs who caught on fire...

Burnt his ass to the ground..!

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BeachcomberSBH
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2018
🚨︎ report
Was talking to my dad about his knee operation

He told me he had 5 knees now Left knee

Right knee

Kidney

Hiney

And weenie

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bretnova
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2018
🚨︎ report
Why don't witches have children?

Because warlocks have hollow weenies and crystal balls!

πŸ‘︎ 77
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/texasjoehotdog
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2017
🚨︎ report
Happy Empty Hotdog Day!

I mean, Happy Hollow Weenie!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SupremeDuff
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2018
🚨︎ report
Halloween Puns

Why couldn’t the witch have children? Her husband had a hallow weenie.


Which ghost is the best dancer? The Boogie Man!


Friend: What are you gonna be for halloween? Me: Drunk!


For Halloween I’m going to write β€œLife” on a plain white T-shirt and hand out lemons to strangers


This Halloween, the only Candy I’m interersted in swings from a pole and has daddy issues


β€œHalloween” = an excuse for girls to dress up like sluts.


Thank goodness for Halloween, all of a sudden, cobwebs in my house are decorations!


I’ll be your trick if you’ll be my treat.


How do Rednecks celebrate Halloween? Pump kin!


When do ghouls and goblins cook their victims? On Fry Day


What’s a monsters favorite desert? I-Scream!


What do you call a Halloween boner? Petrified wood


What do you call a dancing ghost? Polka-haunt-us


What do you call a hot dog with nothing inside it? A β€œhollow-weenie!”


Did you hear about the wild party at the haunted house? The whole vibe was anything ghost (goes).


How do you write a book about halloween? With a ghostwriter.



I’m going to celebrate Halloween the same way I always do… by murdering a bunch of teens by the lake. Sincerely,


Two monsters went to a Halloween party. Suddenly one said to the other, β€œA lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?” The other monster replied, β€œBe a gentleman and roll them back to her.


The lesson of Halloween is that pretending to be something you’re not will lead to a sweet reward.


I remember when Halloween was the scariest night of the year. Now, it’s Election night.


I want to be something really scary for Halloween this year so I’m dressing up as a phone battery at 2%.


Why dident the skeleten go to the halloween party? Becuse he had no body to go with.


What did the bird say on Halloween? Trick or tweet!


What do Italian’s eat on Halloween? Fettucinni Afraid-o (Ha ha ha)


Why can’t the boy ghost have babies? A. Because he has a Hallo-weenie.


What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty on Halloween? A. Ghoul-aid!!!


What do ghosts eat for supper? Spooketi


What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house? Hope it’s Halloween!!


What is the most important subject a witch learns in school? Spelling.

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Punsville
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2017
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you take the insides out of a Hot-Dog?

A hollow-weenie. Happy Halloween y'all!

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/steppek
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2017
🚨︎ report
Oldie but goodie

Why can't ghosts have babies? Because they have Hallow weenies

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/michaelkane911
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2016
🚨︎ report
WhereΒ΄s the Wizard of Oz?

So, there's this yellow toad wandering around in the forest kinda pissed off because he doesn't want to be yellow. Life would be easier if he were brown like the other toads.... He'd sure be less visible to predators for one thing. Anyway.... This yellow toad bumps into a fairy godmother. "Fairy godmother, please make me brown like the other toads" he begs her. "I'm hacked off being so visible to predators. The stress is like, killing me, you know?" "Okay" says the fairy godmother, who whips out her magic wand and goes: "Abracapokus! You're brown!" The toad looks down and sees that he is brown! Except..... for his weenie, which was still yellow. "Hang about lady," he says to the fairy godmother, "My pecker's still yellow!" "Yeah, well I don't do weenies," she says, "You'll have to go see the Wizard of Oz for that." So the toad thanks her and hops off on his way. There is also a purple bear wandering about the very same woods. As luck would have it, he encounters the very same fairy godmother (yes, okay, it's a coincidence, but it's true). "Fairy Godmother! You're just the person I need!" says the purple bear, "I can't pull any bearesses cos they don't want to be seen with a purple bear on account of the hunters. They can spot me from a mile off." Being a fairly nice fairy godmother, she takes out her magic wand. "Oh for goodness sake, what is the matter with you lot round here" she says and with that, she yells: "Pokuscadabra! You're brown!" The bear looks down and sees that he is, in fact, brown. Except for his goolies, which remain purple.. "Hold up sweetheart!" he says to the fairy Godmother, "My goolies are still purple!" "Yeah, well I don't do those goolie things," she replies, "You'll have to go see the Wizard of Oz for that." "Well that's just dandy, innit?" the bear replies, "How the hell do I find the Wizard of Oz?" "Easy," says the fairy godmother as she flew off saying......... "Just follow the yellow-prick toad !!"

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/janeybabygoboom
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2016
🚨︎ report
What do you say to a hot dog on October 31?

Hello Weenie

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheFifthStep
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2016
🚨︎ report
My late grandpa's favorite joke

Grandpa: Did you know I was born with three knees?

7 year old me: No way grandpa, that's impossible!

Grandpa: Sure I was, I have a right knee, a left knee, and a weenie!

It's better when spoken, but still my favorite joke.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tge7
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2014
🚨︎ report
Hurt Knee

Anytime I used to fall and scrape or bump my knee the conversation with my dad would go something like this when he noticed I'd fallen.

Dad: "What happened?"

Me: "I hurt my knee."

Dad: "Which knee? Your left knee, your right knee, or your weenie?"

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/beat1706
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2014
🚨︎ report
Unfortunately, I repeat this dad joke whenever someone hurts their knee

After I hurt my knee in a hockey game.

Dad: "Which knee is it, your left knee? Right knee? Or your weenie!? "

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kreuzade
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2013
🚨︎ report
What is smaller than a teeny weeny flea?

A flea's teeny weenie!

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PensionNo8124
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
🚨︎ report
How many knees do you have?

Four. Right knee, left knee, weenie, heinie.

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAmigops
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2016
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.