A man would have written: "Itsy-Bitsy, GIANT CRANK, Yellow Polka-Dot Bikini."
He wanted to getta long little dogy
A flea's teeny weenie.
A whim away, a whim away, a whim away
they have Hallow-weenies!
Because their husbands have “hallo weenies”. Lol happy holidays y’all.
To get a long little doggie.
He drew an itsy, bitsy, teeny-weeny, yellow, polka dot linguini
Mr. Witch had a hollow weenie.
"Hot dog, it's your birthday! Let's be Frank, you're probably planning to party your buns off, so go ahead - don't be a weenie! Relish every moment of your celebration."
Because they have Hollow Weenies
Why don't ghosts have babies?
Because they have Hollow weenies!
A hollow weenie costume.
Burnt his ass to the ground..!
He told me he had 5 knees now Left knee
Right knee
Kidney
Hiney
And weenie
Because warlocks have hollow weenies and crystal balls!
I mean, Happy Hollow Weenie!
Why couldn’t the witch have children? Her husband had a hallow weenie.
Which ghost is the best dancer? The Boogie Man!
Friend: What are you gonna be for halloween? Me: Drunk!
For Halloween I’m going to write “Life” on a plain white T-shirt and hand out lemons to strangers
This Halloween, the only Candy I’m interersted in swings from a pole and has daddy issues
“Halloween” = an excuse for girls to dress up like sluts.
Thank goodness for Halloween, all of a sudden, cobwebs in my house are decorations!
I’ll be your trick if you’ll be my treat.
How do Rednecks celebrate Halloween? Pump kin!
When do ghouls and goblins cook their victims? On Fry Day
What’s a monsters favorite desert? I-Scream!
What do you call a Halloween boner? Petrified wood
What do you call a dancing ghost? Polka-haunt-us
What do you call a hot dog with nothing inside it? A “hollow-weenie!”
Did you hear about the wild party at the haunted house? The whole vibe was anything ghost (goes).
How do you write a book about halloween? With a ghostwriter.
I’m going to celebrate Halloween the same way I always do… by murdering a bunch of teens by the lake. Sincerely,
Two monsters went to a Halloween party. Suddenly one said to the other, “A lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?” The other monster replied, “Be a gentleman and roll them back to her.
The lesson of Halloween is that pretending to be something you’re not will lead to a sweet reward.
I remember when Halloween was the scariest night of the year. Now, it’s Election night.
I want to be something really scary for Halloween this year so I’m dressing up as a phone battery at 2%.
Why dident the skeleten go to the halloween party? Becuse he had no body to go with.
What did the bird say on Halloween? Trick or tweet!
What do Italian’s eat on Halloween? Fettucinni Afraid-o (Ha ha ha)
Why can’t the boy ghost have babies? A. Because he has a Hallo-weenie.
What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty on Halloween? A. Ghoul-aid!!!
What do ghosts eat for supper? Spooketi
What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house? Hope it’s Halloween!!
What is the most important subject a witch learns in school? Spelling.
A hollow-weenie. Happy Halloween y'all!
Why can't ghosts have babies? Because they have Hallow weenies
So, there's this yellow toad wandering around in the forest kinda pissed off because he doesn't want to be yellow. Life would be easier if he were brown like the other toads.... He'd sure be less visible to predators for one thing. Anyway.... This yellow toad bumps into a fairy godmother. "Fairy godmother, please make me brown like the other toads" he begs her. "I'm hacked off being so visible to predators. The stress is like, killing me, you know?" "Okay" says the fairy godmother, who whips out her magic wand and goes: "Abracapokus! You're brown!" The toad looks down and sees that he is brown! Except..... for his weenie, which was still yellow. "Hang about lady," he says to the fairy godmother, "My pecker's still yellow!" "Yeah, well I don't do weenies," she says, "You'll have to go see the Wizard of Oz for that." So the toad thanks her and hops off on his way. There is also a purple bear wandering about the very same woods. As luck would have it, he encounters the very same fairy godmother (yes, okay, it's a coincidence, but it's true). "Fairy Godmother! You're just the person I need!" says the purple bear, "I can't pull any bearesses cos they don't want to be seen with a purple bear on account of the hunters. They can spot me from a mile off." Being a fairly nice fairy godmother, she takes out her magic wand. "Oh for goodness sake, what is the matter with you lot round here" she says and with that, she yells: "Pokuscadabra! You're brown!" The bear looks down and sees that he is, in fact, brown. Except for his goolies, which remain purple.. "Hold up sweetheart!" he says to the fairy Godmother, "My goolies are still purple!" "Yeah, well I don't do those goolie things," she replies, "You'll have to go see the Wizard of Oz for that." "Well that's just dandy, innit?" the bear replies, "How the hell do I find the Wizard of Oz?" "Easy," says the fairy godmother as she flew off saying......... "Just follow the yellow-prick toad !!"
Hello Weenie
Grandpa: Did you know I was born with three knees?
7 year old me: No way grandpa, that's impossible!
Grandpa: Sure I was, I have a right knee, a left knee, and a weenie!
It's better when spoken, but still my favorite joke.
Anytime I used to fall and scrape or bump my knee the conversation with my dad would go something like this when he noticed I'd fallen.
Dad: "What happened?"
Me: "I hurt my knee."
Dad: "Which knee? Your left knee, your right knee, or your weenie?"
After I hurt my knee in a hockey game.
Dad: "Which knee is it, your left knee? Right knee? Or your weenie!? "
A flea's teeny weenie!
Four. Right knee, left knee, weenie, heinie.
