Water Heater Puns

It's a thankless heater.

It’s often a tankless profession.

It's a tankless job, but somebody's got to do it.

It's a tankless job, but he loves it.

Yet it remains tankless.

This is a tankless job.

When I asked him how it was going he said, "it's a tankless job, but somebody's gotta do it."

It's a tankless job, but someone has to do it.

A plumber is finishing up his last job of the day when he gets a call from his dispatcher to install a water heater. He argues, but the dispatcher says everyone else has gone home and it’s marked as urgent. The plumber concedes the argument and says “It’s a tankless job, but somebody’s gotta do it”

My boy, Arthur, is slow. He is the slowest child I’ve ever met. And I don’t mean mentally, he just doesn’t move quickly at all no matter what the urgency.

He takes an hour to get out of bed and stand up in the morning. He takes an hour to eat. When we go anywhere we have to tell him 20 minutes in advance because he takes that long to get his shoes on. His showers…we had to install an industrial sized water heater and hook it up to his shower exclusively because he would drain the tank and shower in ice cold water and started getting sick from it.

The worst part is that even if you help him out he doesn’t go faster. We can feed him and he’ll just swallow slower. We can wash him and he’ll just sit there for longer.

I’ve learned to live with it and be content because I know he won’t change. But my wife can’t take it. Just the other day she told me she was going to punish him to make him go quicker:

“I’ve had it with him! I’m going to start giving him timeouts and taking away toys for going so slow!”

“Honey,” I said, “it’ll never work.”

“Why not?!”

“Because you can’t rush Art.”

Because it’s a tankless job...

It's a tankless job.