Why did Inky, Blinky, Pinky and Clyde hate going on vacation?

Because they had to pack, man.

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Uncle_Bug_Music
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16
🚨︎ report
From my 70 year old dad: I hung up a map of the US in the kitchen and gave my wife a dart. I told her we would go on a two week vacation wherever she stuck the dart.

Looks like we’ll be spending two weeks behind the fridge.

πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pippingigi
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I got a fungal infection on my tropical vacation.

I'm never going to the moldives again.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MirRelevant
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20
🚨︎ report
I decided to go on a vacation with my family. Almost all the hotel rooms were booked except one

It was our last resort...

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DOU8LEJ480
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08
🚨︎ report
Where do impotent men go on vacation?

Viagra falls.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/arkym00
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Russia has started to vaccinate the inhabitants with their own vacation

I wonder what they putin

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FarmingFriend
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What does James Bond need to go on vacation?

A License to Chill

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TimeX13
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Where do ghosts go on vacation?

Boo!dapest

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sully1227
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I went on a once-in-a-lifetime vacation.

Never again.

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Helix_128
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
This is the first year I'm not taking a vacation to Hawaii due to Covid.

Normally I don't go because I can't afford it.

πŸ‘︎ 73
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
🚨︎ report
What do the vicugna pacos family say when they are about to go on a vacation?

Alpaca bag now.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sherlock_er
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What is Tiger Wood’s favorite place to go on vacation?

The golf coast.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jom_and_Terry0306
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I told my suitcases we weren’t going on vacation

Now I’m dealing with emotional baggage

πŸ‘︎ 224
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hfoste1380
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Where do hamsters go on vacation?

Hamster-dam.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/D3V1L420
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2020
🚨︎ report
What'd the llama say before his vacation?

Alpaca bag

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WantedDadorAlive
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Where do viruses go on vacation?

Germany

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fishy185
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s a pencils favorite vacation destination?

Pencilvania!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/streety22
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
🚨︎ report
I feel sorry for basketball players who can't go on vacation

Because they can't Travel.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/deadsea29
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2020
🚨︎ report
What kind of house do ninja turtles live in when they go on vacation from living in the sewers and fighting crime?

A cowabungalow

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zeke_Smith
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Where do fans of Disturbed prefer to vacation?

A-lah-ah-ah-ska

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NotA_Drug_Dealer
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked my kids when they wanted to go on vacation. I asked β€œWould July to August be okay?”

My son replied, β€œWhy would I lie to August? That’s not nice.”

I got dad-schooled.

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zedhead0628
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did Thanos settle on Asgard for his vacation?

He wanted to keep it low key (Loki)

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dinzlo
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
🚨︎ report
This is going to be the first year that I haven't taken a vacation in Paris, because of the pandemic.

Usually it is due to lack of money

πŸ‘︎ 121
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RDRC
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2020
🚨︎ report
This year due to COVID19, we could not go on a vacation....

Usually its due to lack of money.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bonp27
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Two friends are having a conversation. "My wife has just gone on vacation in the Carribbean" say's one. "Jamaica?" replies the other.

No, she wanted to go.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EastlyGod1
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
🚨︎ report
How do you know that trees long to vacation at the beach?

Because they always bring their trunks.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NThruThe0utdoor
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I was on a family vacation in Japan when I slept in one day. My dad flung open my door and told me to wake up. I said, β€œDad, what do you think this is?...

...the Land of the Rising Son?”

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Campagnolo412
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
🚨︎ report
I listened to a jazz ensemble when I was at the ocean shore for vacation...

Nothing beats sax on the beach!

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Where do crayons go for vacation?

Colorado.

(My 8 year old just made it up)

Edit: Thank you for the gilding, she's super happy about this all. You folks are too kind.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Megaseth
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Where do murderers go on vacation?

The Bahama-cides

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CapDonkey
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife and I can never agree on vacations

I want to go to exotic islands and stay in 5 star hotels. She wants to come with me

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I was tricked into buying an ill-fitting shirt while on vacation in a city in France.

It was Toulouse.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kilokiilo
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2020
🚨︎ report
I went on a once in a lifetime vacation

Never again

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I just told my suitcase that there will be no vacation this year, it sucks!

Emotional baggage is the worst!

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/midy-dk
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I am thinking of going Australia for a vacation

But will I get laid if I visit Adelaid?

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rumble_ftw
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Told my suitcase we could not go on vacation this year

As I'm looking at my empty suitcase I thought it looked sad... Then I thought "great... Now I have emotional baggage!"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BelgianRoo
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife took a vacation day to carry her pet lizard around town in her handbag...

It's a purse anole day for her.

Credit: Brevity by Dan Thompson for May 02, 2020

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Where did the swimmer pack everything for his vacation?

In his trunks!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2020
🚨︎ report
I just bought a cruise vacation!

Couldn't help it. It was too good of a sail.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Isntitabouttime69
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Where do beekeepers stay on vacation?

Air bee and bee.

πŸ‘︎ 74
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bigfoothobbit
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend Wat never gains weight on vacation

Wat goes a round, comes a round

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jpereira73
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Hey boss, I've been thinking about my next vacation. Boss: Oh?

Ya. I'm thinking of taking the rest of the year off

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/transformermike
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Dad:Hey kids! We are going on vacation to East York, PA. Again This year!

Kids: aww again?

Dad: yeah, I always like taking a trip down memory lane.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I was told punpatrol is on vacation
πŸ‘︎ 88
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πŸ‘€︎ u/-_-STRANGER-_-
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the Pirate take a vacation?

Because he desperately needed some ARRR and ARRRRRRRR!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/td941
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2019
🚨︎ report

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